silent thunder

Bums I am missing

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@songsofdistantearth!

@marblehead :(

@CT

 

 

 

Edited by manitou
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Right after I posted this, I saw a recent post from CT.  Apparently this entity can be stricken from my list of missers.

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6 minutes ago, blue eyed snake said:

I would like to add @manitou here, but maybe that is unnecessary.

 

I for one hope it is unneeded!

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On 2/4/2018 at 3:31 AM, joeblast said:

hehe...I liked her, she was feisty and poetic and, well I sympathized with her, that it seemed people had a tough time following her.....

 

On 2/4/2018 at 4:43 AM, silent thunder said:

deci has a rare level of insight and passion and a mental acuity/intensity and gift for language that boggled me...

 

I'm a word-smith and a language whore by nature... from my early childhood.  I learned young the power of language, particularly over the adults around me.  To gain attention, love and respect... or to injure. 

 

deci had deep insights and a very potent way of sharing... i miss that, especially the challenges.

 

It's funny... those close to me who have moved away, or passed away... often what I miss most about them were the quirks that used to make me frustrated.  Because, it was so quintessentially them.  In Alice in Wonderland terms... "it's their muchness".

 

I loved Deci's word styles so much I tried to copy cat it to a degree sort of like one would share a favorite song with people to gauge their reaction to it, thinking is this stuff really as genius and amazing as it seems to me? So I experimented with it on people on the internet, then observed curiously.  

 

I know that I was so into it because it is often detailed like dominoes falling with no gaps and made perfect sense to my mind, with stylishness that was cuttingly fierce that intoxicated me and produced a great deal of that feeling of longing for something that I couldn't place what it was, as if I'd lost simething but had never had it. The word Scheherazade came to mind but that's not the word, though maybe that too in a way. Saudade. That's the one. 

 

I'd write a list of who I missed but Im avoiding list making to a degree. 

 

I tried to join that originaldao forum a number of weeks ago, but my intro post was deleted due to mentioning in passing Library Genesis, and I had spent some time writing it and as I have been having a hard couple of years it kind of shocked me. Then I checked back and thought my IP address had gotten blocked. 

Edited by Songtsan
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1 hour ago, Songtsan said:

 

I tried to join that originaldao forum a number of weeks ago, but my intro post was deleted due to mentioning in passing Library Genesis, and I had spent some time writing it and as I have been having a hard couple of years it kind of shocked me. Then I checked back and thought my IP address had gotten blocked. 

 

I love your description of deci's style.  For what it's worth, the original tao forum is about to be disbanded, or at least that's what I've read elsewhere on the forum.  There's a thread about it in the Forum and Tech support section.

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Missing @Brian!  He hasn't posted in a year.  His sense of humor is greatly missed!

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I scanned this thread of missed souls and was not surprised in the least that I was not listed among them.  I was a wreck when I was in here; smoking way too much weed, taking way too much Vicodin, performing fairly well intellectually but so reeking of ego it's a wonder I wasn't permanently banned. I hit it off with a handful of folks but that's always a statistical likelihood. 

 

Developmental trauma ruins lives and snares people within the trap of learned pessimism. Once I captured an accurate vision of the depth of my negative conditioning, the switch to learned optimism finally occured.  My much intellectualized Buddhist and Taoist path finally became a more genuine path and I was finally able to tone down my own spiritual materialism. 

 

My apologies to all who were on the receiving end of my reeking egocentrism and projection. Those were not good days. 

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21 hours ago, Encephalon said:

I scanned this thread of missed souls and was not surprised in the least that I was not listed among them.  I was a wreck when I was in here; smoking way too much weed, taking way too much Vicodin, performing fairly well intellectually but so reeking of ego it's a wonder I wasn't permanently banned. I hit it off with a handful of folks but that's always a statistical likelihood. 

 

Developmental trauma ruins lives and snares people within the trap of learned pessimism. Once I captured an accurate vision of the depth of my negative conditioning, the switch to learned optimism finally occured.  My much intellectualized Buddhist and Taoist path finally became a more genuine path and I was finally able to tone down my own spiritual materialism. 

 

My apologies to all who were on the receiving end of my reeking egocentrism and projection. Those were not good days. 


It’s good to see you around when you make your occasional visits. I think, I noticed a change with you when you changed your name. Me and Blasto may have butted heads, however, me and Encephalon never did.

And the site had a different vibe back in the day…. I, myself, made many questionable posts, as have many others.

I offer my apologies to you for posts I made that may have taken some joy out of the TDB experience away from you.

I have always read what you post and appreciate your perspective.

I’d like very much to read new posts from you, I have wondered about you; how you’re getting along these days, your practices, thoughts in general, or whatever.

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Thanks for the kind feedback, Zerostao. I'm a little bit saner now and live under the light of positive expectation. Processing childhood trauma is a bitch but the strength at the end of the struggle, not to mention a broader, more comprehensive grasp of the human condition, seems worth the fight. Still, my life is not what it could have been, but I embrace the gift of growing old with my physical health and wits abounding.  Given enough time, the Fool's Journey will either become the Warrior's Journey  or end in a wimper. Lucky for the fools among us, we never quit.

 

Will soon be returning to regular nei kung practice and expect some good traction. 

 

Regards,

Scott

 

 

 

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On 9/15/2022 at 3:16 PM, Encephalon said:

I scanned this thread of missed souls and was not surprised in the least that I was not listed among them.  

 

Encephalon,

 

Your humility is rare and refreshing.  Some of the best people are missed quietly and without fanfare so being memorialized in this thread -- or not -- doesn't mean much.  One of my bucket list goals is not to take social media seriously. As projects go, this one is harder than knocking off a hundred consecutive pushups or mastering calculus.  Worth the effort though.  

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@natural

 

@Encephalon

i know you have a lot to share; my guess is your time available / lack of, for this place, factors.

 

@joeblast

 

i miss this bum’s unique practices, working with hexagrams, is an example. Definitely had/has energetics. 


There are several other bums that rarely venture back around here, some not even posting when they do pass through. These bum’s definitely add, well,  have added to discussions on the way. 
I won’t list then; and I have open lines to some of, but certainly not all of them.

 

I hope that @Earl Grey is doing well and I look forward to his posts upon his return.

 

 

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