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zerostao, March 3, 2011 in General Discussion
"As a Mortician, I always tie the deceased's shoelaces together.
That way, if there is a Zombie apocalypse, it will be hilarious."
Nothing... was in the middle of kunlun this morning... and laughed mindlessly. Then sang tunelessly the rest od the morning
I went to the post office to get some stamps. The guy at the counter asked me what kind. I said 'Anything but the flag'. He smiled and said 'you wouldn't believe how often I hear that'.
A 3lb Yorkshire terrier barking and posturing at a large coyote on the other side of a window.
At the store.
Mom: what part of no do you not understand.
Kid: the part that says I can't.
This poem (of sorts) is in honor of me changing my status from junior to Dao Bum on my profile.
Your a doabum:
If you are sitting on the pot but your really just posting a lot. Your a doabum
If you posted a great theme but nobody knows what you really mean. Your a doabum
If your walking out the door then you pause to post one more. Your a doabum
If you left your body behind and you are posting using only your mind. Your a doabum
If your holding onto your chair posting from a keyboard in the air. Your a doabum
If you transcended onto a new plane while your still posting your last refrain.
A British ship was floundering off the coast of Germany, they get on the radio .
" Hello, hello, is anyone out there ! "
" Hello, yes, this is the German Coast Guard ... what can we do for you ?"
" Oh, thank God ... we are sinking ... we are sinking ! "
" I see .... and what are you sinking about ?"
my son and I at the museum.
walking by an oil painting of adam and eve at the apple tree... with the serpent.
my son: Dad?
my son: why do they always paint adam and eve with belly buttons? what were they supposed to be attached to?
me: i love you.