Unable to just “observe” thoughts- tips?

[oglights]

I am embarrassed that I am still not able to do this even after many years of serious and devoted practice.

Whenever a thought occurs, whether I “observe” it, ignore it, or whatever else strategy I use (it seems like I have tried everything), I still always get pulled in by it. I seem to have no way of separating myself from my experience.

All of my thoughts seem to be “huge” and overpower me. They produce an emotional reaction (usually anxiety), no matter how much I try to objectively observe them as a detached watcher.

I do not feel much “space” between thoughts, because observing one thought just provokes another, and each thought provokes an emotional reaction that makes this worse. Observing the emotional reaction does not seem to do me any good either. When I observe my emotions, they do not dissipate- there is either no change, or they get more intense.

At this point I am wondering if there is anything inherently wrong with my brain. To be honest, I have been meditating for over a decade and regularly put in several hours of meditation a day (usually 1-4 hours per day, as hard as that might be to believe). I have experimented with many methods over the years. I finally decided to do the “waking up” app, and have been following it religiously for a minimum of 1 hour per day for a month now, and I have not noticed any improvement whatsoever.

The problem is, is that I get “entangled” in my mindstream regardless of what I do. I still have not been able to accomplish anything with the “watch the watcher”, either. So whether I put in 1 hour of almost all of my effort to be present, mindful, and follow the instructions, or I just let my mind do whatever it wants, the end result is pretty much the same at the end of the session.

One thing to note is that I do suffer from severe depression and anxiety, and am in an almost constant state of being overpowered by either anger, fear, or sadness. I have tried every conceivable form of treatment and therapy over the years with no improvement in this regard.

The ONLY thing that has ever worked for me over all these years is the “mind stopping” technique, which I am surprisingly able to do quite well. I am able to somehow completely shut out almost all thoughts, or stop them as soon as they appear. When I do this for 20-30 minutes, then I am FINALLY able to experience some semblance of inner space, and of the layers of consciousness and peace that are located beneath the surface waves. Unfortunately, this does not seem to be a viable method of meditation in the long term, because it does not enable me to deal with the inevitable thoughts when they appear.

I understand that I should let go of my expectations regarding meditation, but I figure if I have not had any improvement after a decade of dedicated practice, then I am most likely doing something wrong- or there is something wrong with my brain.

Tl;dr, I cannot stop “reacting” to thoughts, no matter how hard I try- any advice?

[Maddie]

5 minutes ago, oglights said:

I am embarrassed that I am still not able to do this even after many years of serious and devoted practice.

Whenever a thought occurs, whether I “observe” it, ignore it, or whatever else strategy I use (it seems like I have tried everything), I still always get pulled in by it. I seem to have no way of separating myself from my experience.

All of my thoughts seem to be “huge” and overpower me. They produce an emotional reaction (usually anxiety), no matter how much I try to objectively observe them as a detached watcher.

I do not feel much “space” between thoughts, because observing one thought just provokes another, and each thought provokes an emotional reaction that makes this worse. Observing the emotional reaction does not seem to do me any good either. When I observe my emotions, they do not dissipate- there is either no change, or they get more intense.

At this point I am wondering if there is anything inherently wrong with my brain. To be honest, I have been meditating for over a decade and regularly put in several hours of meditation a day (usually 1-4 hours per day, as hard as that might be to believe). I have experimented with many methods over the years. I finally decided to do the “waking up” app, and have been following it religiously for a minimum of 1 hour per day for a month now, and I have not noticed any improvement whatsoever.

The problem is, is that I get “entangled” in my mindstream regardless of what I do. I still have not been able to accomplish anything with the “watch the watcher”, either. So whether I put in 1 hour of almost all of my effort to be present, mindful, and follow the instructions, or I just let my mind do whatever it wants, the end result is pretty much the same at the end of the session.

One thing to note is that I do suffer from severe depression and anxiety, and am in an almost constant state of being overpowered by either anger, fear, or sadness. I have tried every conceivable form of treatment and therapy over the years with no improvement in this regard.

The ONLY thing that has ever worked for me over all these years is the “mind stopping” technique, which I am surprisingly able to do quite well. I am able to somehow completely shut out almost all thoughts, or stop them as soon as they appear. When I do this for 20-30 minutes, then I am FINALLY able to experience some semblance of inner space, and of the layers of consciousness and peace that are located beneath the surface waves. Unfortunately, this does not seem to be a viable method of meditation in the long term, because it does not enable me to deal with the inevitable thoughts when they appear.

I understand that I should let go of my expectations regarding meditation, but I figure if I have not had any improvement after a decade of dedicated practice, then I am most likely doing something wrong- or there is something wrong with my brain.

Tl;dr, I cannot stop “reacting” to thoughts, no matter how hard I try- any advice?

 

I apologize in advance if this is something that you have already thought about and/or tried, but if you can not observe thoughts without getting entangled in them then what about backing up to what you can do and perhaps try observing your frustration with your perceived lack of success observing the thoughts themselves? 

 

What I'm trying to say is don't observe the thoughts, observe the feelings of failing to observe your thoughts.  

 

 

 

[welkin]

Observe can mean many things for different people. I've used that term as well, and this post has reminded me of something i realized not too long ago.

 

Observing can mean having to do something. The idea is not to do anything and let the thought come to you, just as any sensations in your body might arise, without the need to look for it. If awareness of you observing arises it is like you going right through the backdoor and no longer being the observer.

 

Thoughts and feelings require attention, let them come to you and get the attention they need by simply being there for them. That's all you need to do. What happens next will take care of itself.

[idiot_stimpy]

Maybe you're expending too much effort on concentrating on thoughts only. If you take your awareness away from thoughts and into the space between or behind thoughts does it make a difference? As it might be beneficial to bring your awareness into awareness itself. Thoughts only make up a part of awareness, so bringing your attention into the totality of your awareness may be beneficial. 

[freeform]

Not enough Qi 

[oglights]

On 12/20/2020 at 8:53 PM, dmattwads said:

 

I apologize in advance if this is something that you have already thought about and/or tried, but if you can not observe thoughts without getting entangled in them then what about backing up to what you can do and perhaps try observing your frustration with your perceived lack of success observing the thoughts themselves? 

 

What I'm trying to say is don't observe the thoughts, observe the feelings of failing to observe your thoughts.  

 

 

 

 

Thanks for the reply.  Yes, I have done that, but it still creates a vicious circle of reacting-to-reacting.       My main problem is that I am not able to just observe a thought as a thought.  I react to every thought as if I believe it, even though I know it is not necessary true.  Even if I refuse to believe the thought, I still react to it, and I cannot find a way out of this.   Then, I have tried simply observing my reaction to the thought, and I (my body) reacts to that as well.  

[oglights]

On 12/20/2020 at 9:12 PM, welkin said:

Observe can mean many things for different people. I've used that term as well, and this post has reminded me of something i realized not too long ago.

 

Observing can mean having to do something. The idea is not to do anything and let the thought come to you, just as any sensations in your body might arise, without the need to look for it. If awareness of you observing arises it is like you going right through the backdoor and no longer being the observer.

 

Thoughts and feelings require attention, let them come to you and get the attention they need by simply being there for them. That's all you need to do. What happens next will take care of itself.

 

Yes, that is basically what I end up doing, however, there is no progress in my inner state or my daily life after many years. So, I know that I shouldn't have any expectations, but how do I move forward?

[oglights]

On 12/20/2020 at 9:19 PM, idiot_stimpy said:

Maybe you're expending too much effort on concentrating on thoughts only. If you take your awareness away from thoughts and into the space between or behind thoughts does it make a difference? As it might be beneficial to bring your awareness into awareness itself. Thoughts only make up a part of awareness, so bringing your attention into the totality of your awareness may be beneficial. 

 

Yes, focusing exclusively on the space between thoughts does help.    I have not had much luck in being "aware of awareness"- my brain does not seem to compute that command no matter how many angles I try to experience it from.

 

I have been primarily using the "Tao of Letting Go" or "Inner Dissolving" method, which focusses almost entirely on the body's energy and gives no importance whatsoever to thoughts themselves- however, I am having trouble with that because the thoughts themselves take up such a large part of my awareness.

[Maddie]

19 minutes ago, oglights said:

 

Thanks for the reply.  Yes, I have done that, but it still creates a vicious circle of reacting-to-reacting.       My main problem is that I am not able to just observe a thought as a thought.  I react to every thought as if I believe it, even though I know it is not necessary true.  Even if I refuse to believe the thought, I still react to it, and I cannot find a way out of this.   Then, I have tried simply observing my reaction to the thought, and I (my body) reacts to that as well.  

 

Then try feeling your aversion to all of this. It seems to bother you that you get caught up in your thoughts when you try to observe them. Just pay attention to this annoyance. 

[thelerner]

 maybe try- Meditate in a less comfortable position and keep the eyes half open, staring a foot and a little infront of you.

Sometimes meditation means falling into a trance state.  Keep the awareness sharper with a straighter back, and a half eye open stare, it might keep you more alert and focused.  Might help with thoughts coming and going by. 

[Sebastian]

Hey oglights,

 

First, thanks for sharing and I wish you success on your meditative path.

 

Some minor suggestions maybe, but it seems you’re focusing a lot on the context of your meditation, and less on the content.

 

Just know that whatever intent, suggestion or preparation you bring to your meditation will usually have a big impact on the outcome. Even if you are angry that day, in a rush... all of these disturbances will be reflected in the outcome. This is what I mean by context.

Another example is the story that no matter how much you try, you can’t seem to break through the pull of thoughts. This subjective perspective defines context for the meditation too. And the meditation just basically confirms the perspective. It just follows/confirms the original intent.

 

It’s hard for you because your trying to solve your problem with the same energy that created it. You need a new energy, a new vantage point to do your meditation.

 

That’s why I think the inner dissolving you are doing is great. Shift the vantage point of the meditation from the mind to the body.  Even if you end up caught in thought, just return to the body. 
 

And be careful that it’s really the body that is “meditating” and not the mind still controlling everything. You aren’t a performer, and being a performer hasn’t worked as well as you wanted up to this point. So drop the effort, drop the perspective of being a “failed meditator”, and start with a different perspective.

 

Maybe with the intent of curiosity, the intent of just letting go of all your mental defenses and projections and releasing them all into the body, maybe with a great sigh of “I don’t know”.....  maybe try that. 
 

But remember, from the perspective of the body, outcomes don’t matter, there is no performer, there are no mental problems. You just show up basically and sit your body down.... and that’s all there is to it.
 

So how does this fix your problems then ? It doesn’t directly, but it relaxes the mind. Instead of it being compressed or focused on something narrow it expands and unfurls like a flower. You become your awareness, your body, fresh again, and open to any possibility, potential. Because you haven’t defined yourself, you are open and receptive. Then the quality of your thoughts will change.

Anyways, just some ideas.... I also struggle with this and can learn from what I wrote as well.

 

 

 

[Sebastian]

On 12/21/2020 at 4:37 PM, freeform said:

Not enough Qi 

There is much truth in this.

You need Qi to change the quality of mind. The mind by itself can not see...
 

You can view it this way.... The mind is the function of life, but Qi is the substance.

 

Most people stick to the function and try to fix mental problems with the mind.... but thankfully there is another way.  We can cultivate Qi, the substance of life.

 

If you respect the substance of your mind, naturally the Qi will affect the mind. 
 

It’s like a cup of water. If you just let it settle and clear, and stop creating ripples on the surface, then it will naturally reflect.  

 

Eventually the substance of your mind will be so whole and complete, it can think thoughts for you without your conscious involvement if that makes any sense. 
 

The problem is when we mistake the function for the substance. The mind is a useful tool for many things, but we should recognize that it’s not the end of the spiritual world. In fact, it’s a latecomer. The spirit was there first.... As a child you lived for many years without mental chatter. And Qi is its mother...How else could we have thoughts. What are thoughts made of ? 
 

Even if we don’t believe in Qi, maybe folks could give this perspective a try and see if it has any merits. Stick to the Qi, to the body, and not the thoughts. Respect the wholeness of your Qi and energy. Don’t worry if thoughts appear though, just come back to the substance of the thoughts, and of your body. 

 

just some other thoughts.

 

 

[wstein]

On 12/20/2020 at 7:45 PM, oglights said:

I am embarrassed that I am still not able to do this even after many years of serious and devoted practice.

Whenever a thought occurs, whether I “observe” it, ignore it, or whatever else strategy I use (it seems like I have tried everything), I still always get pulled in by it. I seem to have no way of separating myself from my experience.

[...]

Tl;dr, I cannot stop “reacting” to thoughts, no matter how hard I try- any advice?

I would suggest in addition to 'observing' thoughts, to label each one "thought". Labeling creates some additional distance between you and that which is labeled (thoughts in this case). This method worked for me. Can't say if that's enough of an edge for you as my thoughts were not so overwhelming.

[Apech]

On 12/21/2020 at 1:45 AM, oglights said:

I am embarrassed that I am still not able to do this even after many years of serious and devoted practice.

 

First thing is don't be embarrassed, while there are many techniques and mechanisms to meditation it is more of an art than a science.  You can lead yourself to recognising where your mind is at and not where you think it should be at.

 

On 12/21/2020 at 1:45 AM, oglights said:

Whenever a thought occurs, whether I “observe” it, ignore it, or whatever else strategy I use (it seems like I have tried everything), I still always get pulled in by it. I seem to have no way of separating myself from my experience.

All of my thoughts seem to be “huge” and overpower me. They produce an emotional reaction (usually anxiety), no matter how much I try to objectively observe them as a detached watcher.

I do not feel much “space” between thoughts, because observing one thought just provokes another, and each thought provokes an emotional reaction that makes this worse. Observing the emotional reaction does not seem to do me any good either. When I observe my emotions, they do not dissipate- there is either no change, or they get more intense.

 

You have conceptualised what should be happening - feeling a space and so on - probably because you have read or heard that this is what is 'supposed' to happen.  This actually as much as anything is conditioning your experience.  Fair enough you have something you want to achieve, I'm not saying this is wrong, just that you should treat meditation as more of an exploration of mind and its potential than some kind of method towards a pre-defined end.  By 'mind' I mean the whole of your being or even 'being' as such.  Actually your description means that you are already observing what is happening ... being overpowered by huge thoughts and so on, this is normal, as distinct to the abstract hypothetical versions you may read about.

 

If your emotions get more intense on observation then that means you are investing in them in some way.   If I feel sad for instance and I focus hard on the sadness it does intensify - it kind of draws me into deeper sadness.  There are two ways of dealing with this - one is to use the emotion as a trigger to see what images and triggering memories it evokes, trace it back to its cause which is a karmic imprint in your mind and allow it to dissipate (the energy of it should re-integrate into your being).  The other is to just note it and let it be.  The second relies on using breath or some other focus to settle your mind - what Buddhists call shamatha (calm abiding) - this should be on-conceptual, no idea of 'observing' just sitting quietly and relaxed.

 

 

 

On 12/21/2020 at 1:45 AM, oglights said:

At this point I am wondering if there is anything inherently wrong with my brain. To be honest, I have been meditating for over a decade and regularly put in several hours of meditation a day (usually 1-4 hours per day, as hard as that might be to believe). I have experimented with many methods over the years. I finally decided to do the “waking up” app, and have been following it religiously for a minimum of 1 hour per day for a month now, and I have not noticed any improvement whatsoever.

The problem is, is that I get “entangled” in my mindstream regardless of what I do. I still have not been able to accomplish anything with the “watch the watcher”, either. So whether I put in 1 hour of almost all of my effort to be present, mindful, and follow the instructions, or I just let my mind do whatever it wants, the end result is pretty much the same at the end of the session.

 

If you are worried about your brain go and see a doctor for a scan or whatever.  But I think you may be trying too hard - and again you have picked up certain concepts like 'watch the watcher' which are actually, in my view, far from helpful.  In fact I would say, given the amount of time you have already spent meditating you are beyond this beginnery stuff that is spouted regularly by so called experts.  Be particularly aware of the so called 'mindfulness movement' which is full of spectacular nonsense.

 

 

On 12/21/2020 at 1:45 AM, oglights said:

One thing to note is that I do suffer from severe depression and anxiety, and am in an almost constant state of being overpowered by either anger, fear, or sadness. I have tried every conceivable form of treatment and therapy over the years with no improvement in this regard.

The ONLY thing that has ever worked for me over all these years is the “mind stopping” technique, which I am surprisingly able to do quite well. I am able to somehow completely shut out almost all thoughts, or stop them as soon as they appear. When I do this for 20-30 minutes, then I am FINALLY able to experience some semblance of inner space, and of the layers of consciousness and peace that are located beneath the surface waves. Unfortunately, this does not seem to be a viable method of meditation in the long term, because it does not enable me to deal with the inevitable thoughts when they appear.

I understand that I should let go of my expectations regarding meditation, but I figure if I have not had any improvement after a decade of dedicated practice, then I am most likely doing something wrong- or there is something wrong with my brain.

Tl;dr, I cannot stop “reacting” to thoughts, no matter how hard I try- any advice?

 

Meditation only works as part of a 'path' - which means you have also to attend to conduct (which includes your life generally) and understanding (which means your level of understanding of 'things' especially your own body/mind).  It's very difficult I know, because in a way we have to be our own shepherd or therapist.  If you try to use meditation alone you are trying to move a mountain with just a small pickaxe if you see what I mean - the condition of subtle body and mind will continually push you back to habitual patterned behaviour.  But the more you understand how this works, can adjust your own life towards greater consistency and integration - then sitting mediation can spearhead your self-investigation with some chance to feel better about yourself.

 

 

[steve]

@oglights

 

Sorry to hear of your struggles with meditation.

One thing I will point out is that the inner voice of depression is particularly powerful.

If you have severe anxiety and depression, it may be very difficult to find that place of inner peace and refuge that we look for in meditation, at least in my tradition. Combining meditation with some form of treatment of the depression may be necessary. 

 

One problem with "observing the thoughts" is that "the observer" who tries to disengage and observe the thoughts as if they were separate is simply a thought form itself. So we have a mental construct of a "me" trying to observe the other mental constructs, which are highly contagious and have enormous inertia. The tendency towards anxiety and depression makes these constructs far more magnetic and real, like the tracks on a roller coaster that lock to the car. As we put more and more energy into this "observer" we fuel the fire of mental activity rather than release it.

 

In the tradition I follow, the objective is to find that place of inner peace and silence and recognize it is the fundamental source of everything, our basic nature. The practice then becomes learning how to reconnect to that inner source When we are able to connect with inner stillness of the body, silence of the speech, and spaciousness of the mind, the thoughts and feelings have no where to hold and if we are in the right place, they can only self-liberate. Finding that correct place and posture of the body, speech, and mind is very tricky due primarily to its subtlety. This is a very powerful and effective practice but we all need different things depending on our karma so I certainly can't promise it will work for you. If you're interested in giving it a try check out the video.

 

My teacher, Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche, shares a practice from traditional dzogchen teachings, repackaged in a simple and non-sectarian form which is accessible for both formal and informal meditation practice. Below is a video teaching this practice in the context of daily, informal practice where we take each and every opportunity in our day to day life to continuously reconnect to the inner refuge of stillness, silence, and spaciousness. The same practice is used in our formal daily practices on the cushion. This can be the only practice one needs, a lifetime practice. There are also many other practices that can support it.

 

Spoiler

https://www.oceanofwisdom.org/watch-video.php?video=265

 

[helpfuldemon]

Have you tried smoking pot?

[hubi]

On 12/20/2020 at 8:45 PM, oglights said:

The ONLY thing that has ever worked for me over all these years is the “mind stopping” technique, which I am surprisingly able to do quite well. I am able to somehow completely shut out almost all thoughts, or stop them as soon as they appear. When I do this for 20-30 minutes, then I am FINALLY able to experience some semblance of inner space, and of the layers of consciousness and peace that are located beneath the surface waves.

Can you say a bit more about the "mind stopping" technique you have used and your experience with it?

[thelerner]

Glenn Morris had a mind scrubbing practice.  Counting breaths 1-10 & repeat, which is common in many practices, but he added- if a thought came up, you went back to 1.  Pretty hard to do.  So hard its not bad to start out counting each breath double, ie 1 for in hale, 2 for exhale, 3inhale, 4 exhale.  So you only have to get to 5 breaths and repeat, see if you can advance to 5, 10, 20.. minutes.

 

Giving each breath a full count is surprisingly hard.  Since at 9 you think 'almost there' which brings you back to 1.  Thoughts of my toe itches, why am I doing this, what time is it, I'm doing well, I'm doing poorly, all the many thieves of meditation and concentration fight against this simple practice. 

[Limahong]

On 12/21/2020 at 9:45 AM, oglights said:

One thing to note is that I do suffer from severe depression and anxiety, and am in an almost constant state of being overpowered by either anger, fear, or sadness. I have tried every conceivable form of treatment and therapy over the years with no improvement in this regard.

 

Hi oglights,

 

You write well and clearly. Your thoughts must be in order to write thus.

 

My take is that you are shackled with "thoughts" as a WORD.

 

  

 

 

You are touching base with yourself when you have recognized this ~ "One thing to note is that I do suffer from severe depression and anxiety... no improvement in this regard."

 

You aware of the root cause(s) of your predicaments? If so ~ you are on the right path to recovery?

 

On that path, may I suggest that you ~      

 

 

In the above video... @ 1:01/3:19...  NOTHING IS MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN A REAL SMILE STRUGGLED THROUGH TEARS

 

'Smiles' are less heavy the 'thoughts' ~ they are lighter by two letters.

 

YOU SURELY CAN SMILE!

 

- Anand

 

Edited December 26, 2020 by Limahong
Enhancement

[Paradoxal]

3 hours ago, helpfuldemon said:

Have you tried smoking pot?

Even if this was a joke, I would like to throw in that smoking pot *will* cause problems with meditation, and will literally never help someone get closer to mastery of this. It re-contaminates the system that meditation works on decontaminating, thus undoing your effort. 

[Limahong]

1 minute ago, Paradoxal said:

Even if this was a joke...

 

Hi Paradoxal,

 

Maybe we can sit together for a traditional native pow-wow... (without masks)?

 

 

 

 

- Anand

 

[steve]

3 hours ago, Paradoxal said:

Even if this was a joke, I would like to throw in that smoking pot *will* cause problems with meditation, and will literally never help someone get closer to mastery of this. It re-contaminates the system that meditation works on decontaminating, thus undoing your effort. 

 

My experience is cannabis makes thoughts stickier and brings up some repressed emotions. It also delays recognizing when I’ve disconnected and followed thoughts. It colors the clarity I can access. It has a major effect on my sleep and dream cycle - not at all good for dream and sleep yogas. Generally speaking it does nothing for me to enhance meditation, quite the opposite, but it can be taken onto the path like anything else.

[Spaceofawareness]

One thing I would ask, and it may be off base, but as these emotions are arising quite intrusively, and it seems you are averse to these emotions, are they attached to any current unfinished business?

 

What I mean is, are you trying to escape from the emotions by using meditation as a means to “zap” the emotions? 

 

If these emotions are simply left over waves in your being which no longer serve any purpose, then disregard my question, but typically, emotions point to something which we aren’t addressing in our lives. 

 

In this way, no amount of observing would be able to disconnect you from an emotion with an active source or root. 

 

I am not saying, follow the emotion and allow it to dictate your life, but maybe if it continually arises, there might be something which needs dealing with.

 

Alternatively, self inquiry could be useful. Asking yourself if there is emotion, and it is observed but with no distance, how is it this can be known. Could there be a deeper space of knowing in which this is appearing, and can you at least notice this space exists when the emotions subside?

 

Try bringing yourself back to the senses, such as observing sight, allowing colour, shapes, movement to come to you without naming it. Sitting quietly maybe sounds also come to you, merely just observing the quality and character of each sense experience. And definitely grounding this all in the felt sensation of the breath, which is the key to all of this. Become intimately linked to your breath, even when not sitting. Notice your breathing throughout the day whenever possible. But don’t make this a forced thing, and don’t tell yourself “keep noticing the breath”. Be kind to yourself, and allow the sensation of breath to come to you, and stick with you like a shadow, like you always have one eye on the breath. 

 

This might all be obvious stuff, but it sounds like going back to basics and just grounding yourself in this could be useful. 

 

Additionally, it could be you have been trying too hard. You might be caught up in doing this so much that it has become effortful which is antiproductive to this. Don’t force the attention on the breath, attention is the intentional and wilful directing of our consciousness towards a target. This is the “active”, effortful way of observing, but is not what you want to use. You also have a “passive” way of observing, which although can be gently directed, normally just allows the senses, or even the mind to direct it. This is what you need to become more in touch with. Rest more in the passive form of observation, just noticing things. This passive observing is already more spacious and detached compared to active attention. That’s not to say that emotions won’t rattle it, those emotions can and will overshadow this briefly, but, just make sure you come back to this passive observing space. Emotions shouldn’t be the target for now. If they arise, try to notice them, and come back to the breath in this passive observing. And if you do get caught in the emotion, it’s okay. You might be lost in the emotion for a little while. What is most important, is noticing when this has happened, not that it happens or not. Then, once you see clearly you were caught in that emotion, come back to the breath.

 

Another thing which might be useful is, instead of only doing this when doing sitting meditation, bring it into your day. For instance, when you are preparing dinner, observe the cutting, the actions, just notice that you are doing them. And all the while, link this noticing back to the breath.

 

If you are putting our the washing, focus on the way your body moves, grabbing the wet clothes, grabbing a peg, etc. 

 

If you are picking up the coffee cup to take a sip, observe the movement of your hand to the cup, the sensation of of the cup touching your lips, the sensation of swallowing the coffee. Also notice, did you choose to pick up the coffee cup, or did it just happen?

 

For all the mundane tasks in your life, do this. After a while it will become second nature, you will carry this mindfulness with you everywhere, like a shadow or an echo.  

 

But once again, don’t force any of this.

[freeform]

Having extra Qi is like adding space to the inner landscape... when the space of your inner landscape is unfathomably huge, thoughts appear like tiny clouds floating through. Easily ignored.

 

When your inner space is a small cupboard - obviously a cloud in there with you will take up all your awareness whether you like it or not.

 

Secondly extra Qi can ‘power’ your concentration - your ability to stay focused with no effort - so that your awareness grows still and unwavering.

 

Thirdly clearing your channels for Qi to circulate freely (this is on a deeper layer than qigong) - clears all mental detritus... meaning that when your channels are truly clear - simply sitting down and turning your attention inward, you will automatically enter into samadhi - no method, or action necessary - it becomes your default state... (though not where I’m at yet )

[dwai]

Hi OP, 

 

just go through these series of lectures and do the practices and you’ll be able to observe your thoughts without being drawn in.