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I was really looking for milestones. Things that would show itself when one has moved forward along this journey. That way I would know what I am doing is sort a right?? But, I think I come up short because I never have such experiences. No dramas, no insights, no feelings of energy. Only feeling lack of sleep. Finding myself staring into space. Thoughts rush in and out of which I have no control. The analogy would be like floating in the middle of the ocean just hanging onto a piece of wood. The night is cloudy. With no sense of direction, swim this way or that way makes no immediate difference. Effort is weak. All that can be seen is no change. Just stuck. Then, from desperation, the five stages of grief. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. Lastly, Give up and try again later. So, ever since beginning this when I was young, it has been off and on. Mostly off. And as I get older (65), I find myself at the bottom of the stairs again wishing to climb higher this time around. Reminds me of Moody Blues "Late Lament". Breath deep the gathering gloom, Watch light fade from every room, Bedsitter people look back and lament, Another day's useless energy is spent. Genetically in line for dementia. Good thing. This way I can forget my failures and become a different person.
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Yes, communication is a tricky thing -- particularly on a forum like this where everything is writing and there are no visual or verbal cues. It´s not surprising that we all get it wrong sometimes. Personally, I don´t feel like my existence as a gay man is challenged. Or maybe I do and am just not describing the experience the way you do? Occasionally I´ll avoid coming out to someone (say a new acquintance at a coffeeshop) because I think they might be judgmental and am just not invested enough in the potential relationship to want to bother. Mostly though I think that that´s something I´m doing to myself. I could be completely out and probably things would be just fine. And if someone doesn´t want to talk to me after they learn that I´m gay is that really such a loss? Probably not. I do think that it´s harder socially to be trans than gay. My mom has a gay son, me, and my mom´s partner Skip has a trans daughter. Skip once confided in my mom that he wished Emily was just gay like me, implying that that would of been easier to deal with. In another twenty years I think it will be much easier to be trans than it is today. At least relatively speaking, you are a pioneer.
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I've read his book. Some of the stuff therein was truly far out. By comparison, any and every claim ever made on this forum sounds like a child's announcement that he's big enough to put on his shoes all by himself, and his master is even able to tie his own shoelaces! But I think that's the general situation with Western practices vis a vis indigenous shamanic ones, wherever the latter might still survive. I enjoyed the book very much. If I were to get instructions from Malidoma, I'd follow them verbatim I think. Maybe.
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the one some haven't realized yet
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I think this just highlights the importance and difficulty of communication. It did not escape my notice that all of the lgbtq+ identifying people assumed I was being trolled and those who did not assume that are not people who have identified as lgbtq+. It's my assumption that when ones existence as an lgbtq+ person gets challenged regularly it makes one more sensitive to certain keywords or triggers. Communication is not an easy thing.
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when hungry, eat when thirsty, drink when tired, sleep when dysphoric, transition
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@Salvijus deserves credit too. Like some others, I really thought Salvijus was a troll but I was wrong. Sorry Salvijus!
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Is 'just sitting' a post-enlightment practice?
steve replied to Vajra Fist's topic in Buddhist Discussion
I would not recommend that you sit and hope that your mind shuts up. There will always be activity arising in a healthy mind. The objective is not to quiet the mind but to see it as it is. I would also not be too concerned about noting the content, per se. The content has little to do with this practice. What is important is noticing when you've become disconnected/distracted from your practice, such as it is, and reconnect. There needs to be a sort of passive vigilance that notices when we are being/have been drawn into thought, feeling, or focused perception. Once we notice, we simply reconnect with the practice, and continue. For me this is a releasing or resting of the mental activity, opening to my authentic experience, whatever that may be in the moment, and allowing it to be as it is without engaging, grasping, or pushing anything away. This is an ongoing process and is one of the more valuable benefits of sitting practice. With time and patience we begin to notice our interruptions sooner and find it easier to release and reconnect. Eventually it occurs with less and less frequency and effort until at some point we find a sense of stability, almost an inertia, in the openness of unfabricated presence. It can be a gradual process but there can also be very profound and abrupt experiences of the heart/mind opening into stillness, silence, and spaciousness. As practice becomes stable on the cushion it needs to be exercised off the cushion in all areas of our lives. When you practice for months and years you will notice an infinite number of variations on the theme when it comes to ways we disconnect and reconnect to our practice. Also an endless number of meditative experiences arise, the "good" experiences generally indicative of the release of a particular obscuration or blockage and the "bad" experiences often a sign that we are ttrying to hard. I was taught, and teach, a very specific recipe for this process as well. We use the body, speech, and mind, each of which has an aspect that is related to the mind's essence, rather than its content - stillness of the body, silence of the speech, and spaciousness of the mind. Also, in the Bön dzogchen tradition, zhiné (meditation with an object) is practiced until some degree of stability and insight into the mind's nature are achieved. Only then do we begin to practice with less tangible objects like stillness, silence, and spaciousness always moving towards untethering. My experience is that most people find it much more accessible to have a target, of sorts, and a tether. With practice and time these are gradually released until we are able to jump in to the deep end and find support and stability. Undoubtedly there are people who need little or no support. That was not the case for me. As always, wiser for whom? We need to know ourselves and be honest with ourselves in order to know what we need. -
I’ve had this happen at a friend’s house too. Music started playing loud through a speaker that wasn’t plugged into the electric socket or into a laptop. No idea where the sound came from.
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Is 'just sitting' a post-enlightment practice?
silent thunder replied to Vajra Fist's topic in Buddhist Discussion
Some folks see the moon. while others stare at the finger pointing... and wonder. - Yesterday
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Can I just please compliment Maddie on how level-headed she's been throughout this thread. How she has been able to explain from a position of patience and repose. I find it really difficult to discuss critically things I care about in the face of challenge. Least of all things that would be as personal to me as this. So while I learned a lot I didn't know about the transgender experience, it has been this display of emotional maturity that has been the most instructive part of this thread for me. Bravo.
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Is 'just sitting' a post-enlightment practice?
Nintendao replied to Vajra Fist's topic in Buddhist Discussion
Thats crazy. He has a lamp above his head i wasn't talking about in the video itself. I was referring to the energy field he described, that is able to interact with the nerves and qi of students to literally guide internal movement. I posted it in this thread as i wondered if a similar thing happens when Zen masters sit with someone, albeit at a more subtle level since they're not building and shaping qi but mind. So do you think he is hallucinating being able to move qi? Or worse he's putting all this effort into deliberately ripping people off just to be able to buy more whisky and cigars? -
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Is 'just sitting' a post-enlightment practice?
Neirong replied to Vajra Fist's topic in Buddhist Discussion
You can reach a level where stillness becomes permanent. Then, it won't matter if you sit, stand, or walk, and it won't require any specific physical action to work. The reason people require extended sitting in stillness is that they have too much crap floating around in their mental bodies, and they have to wait till all the residue falls down so they regain some clarity. (Think of a cup of tea with leaves). Then, when they leave their "closed 168-hr sitting retreat," they quickly return to their usual state of mind. That is incorrect. If you lift weights till your muscles give up, they will start growing and developing from the stimulus, if you lift balloons, nothing will ever happen. Thats good. Thats crazy. He has a lamp above his head. What lengths and depths do people go to prop their favorite drug addict? -
It starts with meiosis, then proceeds to mitosis-meiosis interplay.
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I see my refereeing came in late . Glad to see a resolve . I was sorta taking the view that it was not trolling and got a bit out of hand and S got dumped on a bit in an overreaction . Although I chose not to say so ( I didnt want the same barrage he got ... well, actually, I dont mind a barrage , but I was worried it would be taken the same way ) , so I decided to hold back and see what played out . You came through ! very admirable Maddie ! You 'salvijed' it and Salvijus .... finally someone who says they are leaving but didnt came back and got resolve .
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No, its in the LGBTQ PA restroom .
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Well said!
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His "Celestial Eye" or Third Eye lecture showed a complete lack of knowledge... It was like a person trying to talk about the cosmos and galaxies, but instead of talking about black holes, nuclear fusion and gravity, he ended up talking about zodiac signs and Virgo's relationships with Taurus.
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If I had a referee whistle I would blow it now . It seems to me Salvijus made a relevant point (in the midst of all that kerfuffle ) ' that some ascribe to the belief that spiritually we are neither male or female but incarnation chooses a role for us and to go with that experience we should not try to change that . I had thought that back there somewhere Maddie said . yeah , but I am not totally enlightened yet . Or something like that . Yoy should have accepted that S. as a an answer to what you where pointing out ., And further to that ; how do we know what a persons path really is ? Maybe it is to accept what 'life has given them' or maybe it is to find a way to change that . I would suggest such decisions about that stay with the person concerned and not be projected onto others choices . Just a thought , if I got things wrong I will hand my whistle in .
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Haven't noticed whether or not you argue, but repeatedly you shit on other's shared experiences, denigrate their schools and lineages with no experience and display a rigid, inflexible attitude and projection of life that speaks distinctly of your level of attainment and 'mastery of your domain' compared to others in the community and in my face to face experiences. Hence, trying to share meaningful words with you is like tossing pearls in mud... though Taomeow has more fortitude than I for this. C'est la vie.
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Not just that ... an inner dialogue with a lot more than just ego .... one could even say 'multiple entities ' ( I only use that term as 'personalities' is lacking ) ..... some of them dont seem to have much 'personality' .
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Considering both of you ; meowosis .
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Here is a video of Nathan Brine talking about longevity, destiny, and immortality. I found it interesting. Can we live forever? | Longevity vs. Destiny (youtube.com)
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Greetings and salutations! I remember exchanging 3 or 4 messages with him on this forum when he was introducing his new book . Long time ago, and for the life of me i cant find those now. If you wanna know anything specific pls let me know. Ironically his groundbreaking work is on the laboratory elixir which understandably is of only academic interest.
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