Formless Tao

If you had only one day to live...

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If you had only one day to live, what advice or life lesson would you give your daughter/son or loved one?

 

Assuming that you know you are going to die.

 

Mine would be in no particular order;

 

1) The golden rule. Treat others as you would like to be treated.

 

2) Masleows hierarchy of needs

 

3)

 

If you live in the past, you wil be depressed.

If you live in the future, you will be anxious.

If you live in the present, you will be at peace.

 

Any constructive thoughts on the above?

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One day is not much. You'd want to prepare yourself and help those left behind in the muddy world at the same time.

 

I'd tell them that one of the best lessons I've got has been that inside, you need to be content no matter what. It may take alot of work to get there but it's worth it.

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My kids know the big stuff. I'd have fun with them. Walk in nature, rides in a limo, good food, good conversation, try to keep it real. Let'em know my passwords and where stuff is at.

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Why put off the most important things till you've run out of time?

Edited by Taomeow
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If you had only one day to live, what advice or life lesson would you give your daughter/son or loved one?

 

 

Taomeow makes a good point.

 

I've already given my kids the best advice I know how.

 

One of the more important things I've tried to impress upon them is the insight that no one has the power to 'make' us feel or act in a certain way unless we give them that power. No one has the power to make me angry - I choose anger, or I choose sadness, or even worse, I'm conditioned to feel or act without ever being aware that I have a choice. This is a delusion that has been programmed into us. It's not easy to see for oneself, but once seen it is very liberating.

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Oh, and this reminds me -- one thing I forgot to mention is that the work I've done reupholstering the sofa after our cat clawed through the fabric is not industrial strength after all. Gotta have to ask the cat to exercise caution.

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Well, part of me really wants to say "Quick! To the gay bathhouse!". Which would most likely be counter-productive to my heterosexual desires, but nevertheless an enjoyable experience.

 

In all seriousness, I would confide in my family, close friends and the like, and do something enjoyable.

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Love everyone regardless of their background, race, age, etc.

 

To Love yourself you must first conquer yourself.

 

Develop a personal relationship with God.

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Well, part of me really wants to say "Quick! To the gay bathhouse!". Which would most likely be counter-productive to my heterosexual desires, but nevertheless an enjoyable experience.

 

LOL :)

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Why put off the most important things till you've run out of time?

 

Taomeow its a hypothetical question so that it may spill out the most important advise or life lesson from the respondents mind.

 

Im interested to hear what others on TTB would have to say...;)

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I understand. My response was an answer in the form of a rhetorical question. :)

Edited by Taomeow
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I'd deny the whole thing was happening and die unexpectedly anyway.

 

But since your post is more about advice, I'd say:

 

Learn to concentrate, then accept everything.

Edited by Kajenx
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A Mindful Poem

Here's a really rather wonderful poem by a fellow funeral celebrant, Jonathan Taylor, who works down in Devon. He is part of the Green Fuse network. It seems to me a mindfulness primer, a miniature tutorial in how to live well; I think I'd trust a man who can write this to see me off under the ground! The "hinge" in the middle works so well, and the last word makes what seems to me, coming after the rest of the poem, a profound point.

 

Well, see what you think.

 

 

My Last Day

 

 

They say live each day as if it were your last.

 

Well, I ask you, how impractical can you get?

If today had been my last day

I wouldn't have wasted it going to work!

I'd have gone to see my loved ones

to tell them of the joy they give me;

how their love has enriched my life;

how sad I am to be leaving them alone without me;

to be leaving the world where they live;

how full of regret I'm feeling.

 

They'd get pretty pissed off with me if I did that every day.

 

I've got a better idea.

Why not live each day as if it were your first?

You'd spend your life marvelling

at the fabulous, vibrant, living world around you.

Taking nothing for granted

you'd rediscover love every day.

You'd always be aware of what your loved ones mean to you,

how they delight you even when they're being horrible.

You'd want to give all of your love

to anyone who cared to receive it,

to share in the miracle of life with every solitary and universal heartbeat.

You'd trust anyone,

unless they proved themselves unworthy;

and you wouldn't care if they did -

wisdom would be their gift to you.

You'd be happy,

and free,

and every moment would overflow

with ridiculous promise.

 

Let the first be first

and the last be first.

And then move on,

unready.

Edited by GrandmasterP
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I'd probably spend the day doing a few of the things that connect me to source. Hit the beach and listen to the timeless time-keeping of the waves. Always a deeply, instinctual and beautiful reminder that I am like a wave, unique and individual but one with the ocean simultaneously.

 

Share a great meal with those I love.

 

Tickle the bejesus out of my son and play. Take some time to just watch him.

 

Stare into the eyes of my wife and hold her precious hands.

 

and listen... so often these days, I see so many people desperate to 'teach' others.

I'd take some time to listen, to the world, my family, my body, my breath.

 

Which is cool to realize that I do these things daily already :) even a broken clock (analog) is right twice a day :P

 

side note: after the recent and very unexpected death of my Father; I've followed his example and have predesignated my family on all of my accounts and deeds of property, so that when I pass, they will have no need to involve the probate courts or any lawyers. A few simple forms and all relevant funds will transfer to them without hassle. So the mechanical life stuff is no longer weighing on my mind. That's a freedom for me while I yet live.

 

What a gift he gave my Sister and I when he did that for us. Allowing us the freedom to simply mourn, rather than wade into the wrestling match of court documents and legal processes.

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Well, since this is all hypothetical anyway, it would be safe to assume that I could be from another gender just as easily. And then I would have sex as a man. I'm just so curious how that would be.

 

I'd have no good advice to give anyone, just as I don't have now, sorry!

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I wouldn't try to cram as much as possible in one day, nor turn it into my own version of "the last lecture." I'd simply take everyone out for a great dinner and then have a nice get-together with stories and laughter and fun. The ancients were wrong about many things, but they were right on the money with "eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die." ^_^

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If you live in the past, you wil be depressed.

If you live in the future, you will be anxious.

If you live in the present, you will be at peace.

 

Any constructive thoughts on the above?

 

True,...if you live in the Present, you will be at peace....however, if your present is the perceived present of sensual delusion, you're still in the past,...and the past the past. Just because you're a tenth of a second in the past, it is no different than an hour in the past.

 

So,...tomorrow you are going to die. You are going to jump off a building to your death. Will you be aware of this death? Probably not,....because at the time you hit the sidewalk, your brain is still a tenth of a second or so behind it. So they say.

 

If I was going to die tomorrow, I may double check the follow up instruction,...but would likely not tell anyone,...been through that before,...more than once,...too much drama. Even hearing of Tim Leary's celebratory death on film,....too much drama.

 

I actually thought I was going to die 2 months ago,...had a serious surgery,...but that wasn't it,....it was a few hours after the surgery when I contracted pneumonia that I thought I was a goner, for the following three days. Really wasn't a big deal,...it wasn't my first time.

 

Yeas ago I felt like getting involved in a hospice. My idea was, it would be a great opportunity to talk with people about to die,....I thought, what awesome honest conversations I could have. But not a single was interested in honesty,...spirituality,...etc.,...they all wanted to talk about their past, their memories,....their "me story." So I stopped doing that.

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