Enishi

New Age Bullies

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I found this article annoying, mostly because it is reactive (no, I am not a "New-Ager"). The article makes some valid points, but is not "spot on", as someone said. She has an accusing, self-righteous tone in this article. The truth is somewhere in the middle.
Julia Ingram herself is a PAST-LIFE regression hypnotherapist, so is probably speaking from her own past experience, lol.

 

But I do agree in general that many New Agers tend to oversimplify and overhype things...while promising instant gratification with little effort.

 

And I also agree that many of them just start spouting cliched New Age rhetoric, instead of genuinely investigating what is specifically going on in your case. I got some "readings" from some "New Agers" a few months ago and that's basically what they gave me.

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I found this article to be very interesting and it hit me in a very personal way. I can't agree with everything she said but she did make some points that I found enlightening.

 

I have a very strong belief that everything that happens to us is in some way a consequence of our own actions or beliefs whether it be considered good or bad (whatever that means). If something 'bad' happens to me then clearly I should modify my behavior to obtain a different outcome. Believing that it's not my fault means I have no ability to change anything, so all I can do is bitch and moan 'poor me :( ' The key factor though is that this belief comes ( and must to be useful) from a sense of power rather than weakness. If I caused it to happen then I can do things better next time.

 

I have had several experiences where people I care deeply about have been suffering and I see them fall into a victim mentality. I've personally experienced the downward spiral this can cause (it nearly killed me actually) and try desperately to show them the wonderful power they have to change things for the better. This has rarely gone well though :( Often enough, as pointed out in the article, they take it only as blame pushing them deeper into the pain I was trying to save them from. It then gets quite a bit more difficult to comfort them. It can be very painful to see words intended to comfort and empower have the opposite effect so these days I choose to be MUCH more carful about the way that I introduce concepts like this or whether to do it at all. To me it has been much more useful to show people how to apply this concept in an area where they already feel powerful and then help them expand it to other areas. Once they're already hurting it's too late you'd do better to just give them a shoulder to cry on ;)

 

If more people read this article I suspect many could avoid learning these lessons the hard way like I did.

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Guest paul walter

Um, hello? Everyone knows that licensed professionals don't care about you, they only care about the money they can get from you! Their advice won't be to help you, it will be advice to help the machine of society. You're a broken cog, all they are about is fixing you so you can work as a slave for the greedy corporations that control your life! I know this because of what my New Age minister told me! That's why if I ever have a problem (and I've never had a problem that truly tests my faith as a new ager) I would go see my new age minister right away! It's good he isn't licensed, because I know now he isn't brainwashed by society!

 

 

Bravo Sloppy ;) My experience with New Agers is only equalled by my experience with professionally trained practitioners of all stripes. Dangerous people to rely on in any way not connected to money. :(

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Bravo Sloppy ;) My experience with New Agers is only equalled by my experience with professionally trained practitioners of all stripes. Dangerous people to rely on in any way not connected to money. :(

 

I assumed Sloppy was being facetious. What are you saying, Paul?

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Guest paul walter

I assumed Sloppy was being facetious. What are you saying, Paul?

 

 

I'm saying Sloppy is right on the ball!

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I found this article annoying, mostly because it is reactive (no, I am not a "New-Ager"). The article makes some valid points, but is not "spot on", as someone said. She has an accusing, self-righteous tone in this article. The truth is somewhere in the middle.

 

I believe that there are lessons to be learned from life's hardships, including illness.

The new age minister above was not wrong, but his timing was off. She needed practical help right then, later, perhaps some perspective.

 

I also think that there is something wrong with the way we view disease, and often there is a taking on of an identity as a 'survivor'. Why do people continue to refer to themselves as a "_____ cancer survivor". If it were me, I would move on from that identity, and just live my life, instead of reminding strangers from here on out that you have "battled cancer" and won (for now, anyway). Why embrace that role?

 

I believe that events are neither "good" nor "bad". Some things that happened in my life I thought were "bad" have turned out to be "good", and vice-versa (but then I stopped labeling them either way). From a perspective of greater time, one can see how there is really no "good" or "bad" event. There are spiritual teaching stories that allude to this.

 

I have known some people who are fully in the role of victim, who continue to act and think in such a way that they continue to be victims over and over again, until something changes. For example, it's well-known that one's attitude and confidence affects whether or not a sociopathic individual perceives vulnerability and perpetrates a street crime on someone. I'm saying, learn how to step out of being victimized.

 

So, what did Hannah decide her son's death meant? Anything? Nothing? He committed suicide, wasn't it that he had somehow (even if mistakenly) "chosen to die"? Hannah now apparently sees the world as a chaotic, random, frightening place, where things happen for no reason. So he committed suicide for a randomly? Could it be because of her parenting? His drug addiction? his unresolved sexuality? A Romantic world view? Or did it "just happen"? I don't know, Hannah, it would make me feel worse to believe that the world is simply chaotic, cold, and random. It's up to each of us to make sense of our life experiences through philosophy, or spirituality, or religion, or psychology, or science, or a mixture of all of the above. I think the concept of Karma evolved to try and ex[lain the randomness of life.

 

But not all of life is random. You have a massive heart attack at age 53? Want to bet that your lifestyle, and your choices, and therefore your values have something to do with it? (Unless of course you have Familial Hypercholesterolemia or something related).

 

You don't have to wonder why you 'created' an illness, but you can bet there are lessons involved in living (or dying) with it.

 

So the article points something out that is valid, but overstates the case. Those people are not bullies. There are merely somewhat misguided, overzealous and perhaps insensitive. A bullies intention is to dominate and demean. I'm not sure I would call it hubris, either.

 

I don't think things "happen for a reason", but later on, with hindsight, you can see that there often was meaning derived, or values changed, or a new direction, or a re-ordering of priorities, or a slowing down, or despair that led to suicide, or despair that led to a new strength and determination, and on and on... and so, there becomes a 'reason' (looking back) that something happened.

 

The New-Agers need to practice presence and compassion, and avoid moralizing. Everyone likes to pile-on and ridicule some of the woolly beliefs and actions of New-Age people. But it seems to me their hearts are already in the right place...now let's not start bullying them! :P

 

 

THIS RESPONSE WAS THE ONE THAT WAS SPOT ON! AWESOME, TRUTH ALWAYS SO REFRESHING :)

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I found this article annoying, mostly because it is reactive (no, I am not a "New-Ager"). The article makes some valid points, but is not "spot on", as someone said. She has an accusing, self-righteous tone in this article. The truth is somewhere in the middle.

 

I believe that there are lessons to be learned from life's hardships, including illness.

The new age minister above was not wrong, but his timing was off. She needed practical help right then, later, perhaps some perspective.

 

I also think that there is something wrong with the way we view disease, and often there is a taking on of an identity as a 'survivor'. Why do people continue to refer to themselves as a "_____ cancer survivor". If it were me, I would move on from that identity, and just live my life, instead of reminding strangers from here on out that you have "battled cancer" and won (for now, anyway). Why embrace that role?

 

I believe that events are neither "good" nor "bad". Some things that happened in my life I thought were "bad" have turned out to be "good", and vice-versa (but then I stopped labeling them either way). From a perspective of greater time, one can see how there is really no "good" or "bad" event. There are spiritual teaching stories that allude to this.

 

I have known some people who are fully in the role of victim, who continue to act and think in such a way that they continue to be victims over and over again, until something changes. For example, it's well-known that one's attitude and confidence affects whether or not a sociopathic individual perceives vulnerability and perpetrates a street crime on someone. I'm saying, learn how to step out of being victimized.

 

So, what did Hannah decide her son's death meant? Anything? Nothing? He committed suicide, wasn't it that he had somehow (even if mistakenly) "chosen to die"? Hannah now apparently sees the world as a chaotic, random, frightening place, where things happen for no reason. So he committed suicide for a randomly? Could it be because of her parenting? His drug addiction? his unresolved sexuality? A Romantic world view? Or did it "just happen"? I don't know, Hannah, it would make me feel worse to believe that the world is simply chaotic, cold, and random. It's up to each of us to make sense of our life experiences through philosophy, or spirituality, or religion, or psychology, or science, or a mixture of all of the above. I think the concept of Karma evolved to try and ex[lain the randomness of life.

 

But not all of life is random. You have a massive heart attack at age 53? Want to bet that your lifestyle, and your choices, and therefore your values have something to do with it? (Unless of course you have Familial Hypercholesterolemia or something related).

 

You don't have to wonder why you 'created' an illness, but you can bet there are lessons involved in living (or dying) with it.

 

So the article points something out that is valid, but overstates the case. Those people are not bullies. There are merely somewhat misguided, overzealous and perhaps insensitive. A bullies intention is to dominate and demean. I'm not sure I would call it hubris, either.

 

I don't think things "happen for a reason", but later on, with hindsight, you can see that there often was meaning derived, or values changed, or a new direction, or a re-ordering of priorities, or a slowing down, or despair that led to suicide, or despair that led to a new strength and determination, and on and on... and so, there becomes a 'reason' (looking back) that something happened.

 

The New-Agers need to practice presence and compassion, and avoid moralizing. Everyone likes to pile-on and ridicule some of the woolly beliefs and actions of New-Age people. But it seems to me their hearts are already in the right place...now let's not start bullying them! :P

Ahhahah :D Great response... Spot on...

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I like your response! Especially: 'The new age minister above was not wrong, but his timing was off. She needed practical help right then, later, perhaps some perspective.' -It's important to make sense, find meaning and to try to learn from life's hardships, it's only when your coming out of the tunnel and don't see yourself as a victim and begin to reclaim your personal power that you can begin to see the bigger picture. When someone is in a full blown crisis they can't see the wood for the trees. I agree it's all in the timing!

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"In terms of the economy, look, I inherited a recession, I am ending on a recession." --George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Jan. 12, 2009

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