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Controlling sexual desire

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Have I mentioned that I never tried to control my sexual desires when I was young? I always tried to fulfill them.

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Have I mentioned that I never tried to control my sexual desires when I was young? I always tried to fulfill them.

How unusual lol :D

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She does not even realize consciously what she is doing at all, its just sort of instinct for her and a lot of people. Later that day she gave me a classic example of how she does it. So at the time she was draining off m qi I was helping her change her bike tire. It was kind of tricky and at one point we were contemplating taking it to the bike shop down the road, but we eventually got it. After that we went to lunch and as we were talking about the bike tire she was telling me that if we had been unable to get the tired changed that her next tactic would have been to go to the bike shop and play "cute and dumb" in hopes of getting the tired changed for free.

 

I asked her why she would act dumb. She said because if she went in there being smart and serious and saying "I am having a hard time getting this bike tire on" then they would most likely view her neutrally and charge her.

 

Then she said but if I go in there and say in a high voice "oh can you please help me I don't have any idea what I'm doing" and acting like a dumb bimbo that they would want to run to the rescue lol.

 

Now on my end this was VERY enlightening. When she said it the first time I felt nothing in particular. The second time she said it I could actually feel my "male hero empathy" aroused and my qi drained off by her for the few seconds she was talking that way lol.

Yes, exactly. SHE wasnt draining your qi. YOU got hooked into her tactic.

 

Think about it.. if you were gay, you wouldnt have drained qi when she played it all girlie. Nor would you be drained if you were with a high % of mysogyny.

 

Your response to being asked to be the traditional strong supporting male, is to feel weakened.

 

If you were Tarzan and a girlie askes you to 'pwease change my tire, pwease", you'd swing through the trees bellowing a funny yodel thing, and feel stronger.

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Yes, exactly. SHE wasnt draining your qi. YOU got hooked into her tactic.

 

Think about it.. if you were gay, you wouldnt have drained qi when she played it all girlie. Nor would you be drained if you were with a high % of mysogyny.

 

Your response to being asked to be the traditional strong supporting male, is to feel weakened.

 

If you were Tarzan and a girlie askes you to 'pwease change my tire, pwease", you'd swing through the trees bellowing a funny yodel thing, and feel stronger.

Haha that made me laugh (the Tarzan part) lol.

 

Well she was draining my qi, but it sort of made me realize where that legend about how a "vampire can not enter your house unless you invite them in" came from.

 

She took the qi, but only after she subconsciously affected me in such a way as to sort of want to donate it lol.

 

I think that's why in the past week I'd gotten better at not allowing her to drain my qi, cause I told myself I wasn't going to fall for it haha.

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Sex is like old bubble gum - it just keeps sticking to you the more you try to take it away.

 

So if you're trying to build up your energy then the flies will stick to you - they will seach you out and do whatever they can to take your energy from you.

 

It is totally impersonally. I've had plenty of times where I am sitting in full lotus in public and then I feel my energy getting sucked out of me - but no female is in sight! Then I turn my head around - ah -- a female is behind me! haha. Or once I was in a Muslim restaurant in full lotus and I felt my energy get sucked out of me so I had an internal climax. Where was the female? It was room full of males! But wait! I was sitting next to the screened off "female" area of the restaurant and on the other side of the screen was a female in full regalia -- body all covered up. haha.

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Haha that made me laugh (the Tarzan part) lol.

 

Well she was draining my qi, but it sort of made me realize where that legend about how a "vampire can not enter your house unless you invite them in" came from.

 

She took the qi, but only after she subconsciously affected me in such a way as to sort of want to donate it lol.

 

I think that's why in the past week I'd gotten better at not allowing her to drain my qi, cause I told myself I wasn't going to fall for it haha.

She knows how to make qi transations. So does everyone who is alive. So do you. Sometimes you participate in transactions that drain you and you are getting conscious about it.

 

My guess is that her bf knows how to take her qi as well, and she feels drained by him when he makes it clear she should have less pubic hair/thinner thighs/a higher degree of education/better fellating skillz etc..

 

and so the beat goes on.

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Sex is like old bubble gum - it just keeps sticking to you the more you try to take it away.

 

So if you're trying to build up your energy then the flies will stick to you - they will seach you out and do whatever they can to take your energy from you.

 

It is totally impersonally. I've had plenty of times where I am sitting in full lotus in public and then I feel my energy getting sucked out of me - but no female is in sight! Then I turn my head around - ah -- a female is behind me! haha. Or once I was in a Muslim restaurant in full lotus and I felt my energy get sucked out of me so I had an internal climax. Where was the female? It was room full of males! But wait! I was sitting next to the screened off "female" area of the restaurant and on the other side of the screen was a female in full regalia -- body all covered up. haha.

This is the aspect that I notice in class as well. I might choose a table that is relatively isolated and class starts and the professor is talking and I'm taking notes and no big deal.

 

Then like 30 min into the class I start to feel my qi being drained and I'm like "?". So I turn around and a female classmate had just come into class late. I noticed the qi first, her being there second.

 

It's more noticeable if I'd done a lot of meditation before class.

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Sex is like old bubble gum - it just keeps sticking to you the more you try to take it away.

 

So if you're trying to build up your energy then the flies will stick to you - they will seach you out and do whatever they can to take your energy from you.

 

It is totally impersonally. I've had plenty of times where I am sitting in full lotus in public and then I feel my energy getting sucked out of me - but no female is in sight! Then I turn my head around - ah -- a female is behind me! haha. Or once I was in a Muslim restaurant in full lotus and I felt my energy get sucked out of me so I had an internal climax. Where was the female? It was room full of males! But wait! I was sitting next to the screened off "female" area of the restaurant and on the other side of the screen was a female in full regalia -- body all covered up. haha.

Drew, just for exploratory sake.. do you know for sure that no part of is reaching out looking for female energy.. how do you know it isnt a unconscious need that sent out tentacles, in the muslim restaurant. Sniffing out some food is an instinct, no?

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Sex is like old bubble gum - it just keeps sticking to you the more you try to take it away.

 

So if you're trying to build up your energy then the flies will stick to you - they will seach you out and do whatever they can to take your energy from you.

 

It is totally impersonally. I've had plenty of times where I am sitting in full lotus in public and then I feel my energy getting sucked out of me - but no female is in sight! Then I turn my head around - ah -- a female is behind me! haha. Or once I was in a Muslim restaurant in full lotus and I felt my energy get sucked out of me so I had an internal climax. Where was the female? It was room full of males! But wait! I was sitting next to the screened off "female" area of the restaurant and on the other side of the screen was a female in full regalia -- body all covered up. haha.

 

If you are a young healthy active male who is also celibate you are going to have a lot very powerful sexual energy trying to find its way towards release, this is the fundamental drive of the universe you are dealing with which is always seeking to fulfil its purpose, so how do you know it is not your own sexual energy trying to attach to the females rather than them trying to take your energy?

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She knows how to make qi transations. So does everyone who is alive. So do you. Sometimes you participate in transactions that drain you and you are getting conscious about it.

 

My guess is that her bf knows how to take her qi as well, and she feels drained by him when he makes it clear she should have less pubic hair/thinner thighs/a higher degree of education/better fellating skillz etc..

 

and so the beat goes on.

Actually its very interesting being at her bf house and watching the interactions between him, her, and his friends.

 

More often than naught their latest gossip conversations that they have every single time they get together get very boring for me very quickly. So we are all sitting around his living room, and they are all talking about pointless crap, and I just start meditating haha. Anyways after a few min of meditation I become sensitive to the qi interactions going on in the room.

 

I feel her bf's friends lusting after her, and being jealous of him for having her haha. I'll feel her ego wanting a boost and then a second later she'll make some sort of comment to get an emotional reaction out of her bf, and when he reacts on que he releases some qi and she absorbs it and feels pretty good from the experience.

 

Of course she has no idea that shes trying to milk some more qi out of him, so does not understand why the reactions she gets out of him makes her feel good. lol

 

Then its like his ego feels the qi loss and wants it back, so he'll say or do something to get a reaction out of her, and then you get a reverse exchange, and back and forth and back and forth it goes. Its kind of like ping pong haha.

 

Then one of her bf's jealous friends will tease him and that will get a rise out of both of them and now he gets the qi, and it goes on and on and on.

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If you are a young healthy active male who is also celibate you are going to have a lot very powerful sexual energy trying to find its way towards release, this is the fundamental drive of the universe you are dealing with which is always seeking to fulfil its purpose, so how do you know it is not your own sexual energy trying to attach to the females rather than them trying to take your energy?

 

 

The chi energy activates the female vagus nerve and so then the female goes into what primatologists call "female display behavior" -- the most common display behavior is "backside display" but there's also the "spread eagle" display and the "Baywatch Effect" - flexing out the breasts - and also direct eye contact and also mimicking masturbating and fellatio -- this is sticking the tongue into the side of the cheek as if the tongue was a penis (I know -- I was shocked when I first say this display done to me). Another is putting the hand in the jerking off gesture - like behind the back - or also there is actual female masturbation - this is by pumping the legs or even using the finger - in public. There there are the vocal gestures - orgasmic sounds being made - and then there's the arching of the back - and the shuddering. Then there's the verbal confirmation - "he's orgasmic" and "do you know what you're doing to me?" "I'm already cumming!" OH yeah females staring at my penis. Lap dancing to me while I'm in full lotus, etc.

 

So when the female climaxes through visual display -- jumps in the air and yells out orgasmic cry - and the exact same time then ejaculation shoots up my back as an internal climax.

 

I did this for five years and then I got a phone healing from qigong master Chunyi Lin who said "it's great you can give females bliss but until you store up your energy in your lower tan tien then your transmissions will always be weak."

 

I knew that - my energy was much stronger back in 2000 when I did the intensive training.

 

I began sitting in full lotus in public as self defense - I had girls hitting on me - like total strangers getting into my public space - staring into my eyes lasciviously - and the parents look on, like encouraging the girls to get as much as possible. haha.

Edited by pythagoreanfulllotus

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The chi energy activates the female vagus nerve and so then the female goes into what primatologists call "female display behavior" -- the most common display behavior is "backside display" but there's also the "spread eagle" display and the "Baywatch Effect" - flexing out the breasts - and also direct eye contact and also mimicking masturbating and fellatio -- this is sticking the tongue into the side of the cheek as if the tongue was a penis (I know -- I was shocked when I first say this display done to me). Another is putting the hand in the jerking off gesture - like behind the back - or also there is actual female masturbation - this is by pumping the legs or even using the finger - in public. There there are the vocal gestures - orgasmic sounds being made - and then there's the arching of the back - and the shuddering. Then there's the verbal confirmation - "he's orgasmic" and "do you know what you're doing to me?" "I'm already cumming!" OH yeah females staring at my penis. Lap dancing to me while I'm in full lotus, etc.

 

So when the female climaxes through visual display -- jumps in the air and yells out orgasmic cry - and the exact same time then ejaculation shoots up my back as an internal climax.

 

I did this for five years and then I got a phone healing from qigong master Chunyi Lin who said "it's great you can give females bliss but until you store up your energy in your lower tan tien then your transmissions will always be weak."

 

I knew that - my energy was much stronger back in 2000 when I did the intensive training.

 

I began sitting in full lotus in public as self defense - I had girls hitting on me - like total strangers getting into my public space - staring into my eyes lasciviously - and the parents look on, like encouraging the girls to get as much as possible. haha.

 

I'm curious. I assume that now you are focusing more on storing the energy in your dan tien. In doing so do you find that females notice the energy less now?

 

I ask because as you know a few weeks ago I was having more of the kinds of problems you were mentioning about the display behavior. Then you suggested storing the energy in the dan tien. Since that time I've noticed that while the issues has not totally gone away, it does seem to have lessened.

 

Of course that could also be that this past week my kundalini was exorcising all sorts of emotional blockages which was very unpleasant, and I am pretty sure it was having this effect on all who got near me (which is why I mostly holed up in my apartment this week like a hermit lol). I went to the nature trail earlier this week when kundalini was still in full force, and I stopped at the cliff wall where some rock climbers were climbing to watch with a few other people. Well as soon as I show up the other spectators all start looking "fidgety" lol and uncomfortable and leave after about a min.

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No - it's the same - I live with four females and they all suck up my energy. I get orgasmic sounds from the females - and also display behavior.

 

Since I no longer "flex" my pineal gland then the female reactions are much much less because I'm not transmitting energy to give them what they want. haha.

 

I used to do that and the females were much happier, relaxed, and also healthy and energized. As soon as I stopped then the females got cranky - "bitchy" - and sick.

 

But I stopped right after the phone healing with Chunyi Lin. So now the females are forced to sublimate their energy since they can only get the energy from my indirectly -- not from my transmitting it to them.

 

So if a perv gets their electromagnetic spirit pulled up from the lower sex center into their liver -then the perv gets angry! Because the perv is having their consciousness elevated to a higher frequency against their will - it is an exorcism.

 

So if a perv can not get their lust fix then they try to get a "Rise" out of the person. It doesn't work well - in other words if you can get the male angry then it's a poor substitute to soak up the energy discharge.

 

But only through meditation can that angry energy be converted into the internal climax energy. It has to be converted from the stress system to the relaxation system - the parasympathetic nervous system.

 

So that is what I call the anger-fear-sex cycle. LIke the baboons studied by Sapolsky - the bored Alpha baboons intentionally beat up on the beta baboons because then the alpha baboons get a dopamine rise out of it - well where do they get that dopamine from? haha.

 

So the thing is that the female orgasm converts dopamine to serotonin but what happens is that if the female is not getting enough orgasms then she is stuck in the dopamine cycle - just trying to get more dopamine fixes. Dopamine is what causes violence also. the testosterone turns into dopamine. So then you get all the sadomasochistic b.s.

 

It all is based on male ejaculation addiction which is what our whole Western culture is based on going back to the Greek philosophers -- the older philosophers suck off the younger ones - literally suck off - to get the younger male energy.

 

But the male ejaculation then puts the system back into the stress mode. So it is a positive feedback cycle and just gets stuck in dopamine - more stress - more violence dopamine - dopamine sex - more stress - more violence, etc.

 

That basically sums up Western civilization right there and why it is destroying the planet. Modern humans are basically just chimpanzees or baboons.

 

So when I was just outright giving the females orgasms then they were much happier and healthier but obviously that is totally taboo for modern society. haha.

 

It's also dirty energy since it's not based on purifying the yin chi energy into yang chi energy through the solar heart energy.

 

So Modern people are in total denial about this - it is instinctive psychophysiology we are talking about. It's why the Bushmen males practice Tshoma for their training - a month of solitude away from the females. Then when the third eye is open they can heal the females better.

Edited by pythagoreanfulllotus
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I'm not sure how one "flexes" the pineal gland? but I'd like to know how.

 

Since I don't know how to do that, a few years ago I had another trick that I don't use anymore because I realized it was manipulation.

 

So a few years ago after my divorce I went dating crazy. Having done energy healing through my hands I did know how to project qi that way. So what I'd do on a date is if it got to a "make out session" but if the girl still seemed reluctant to go "all the way" I'd place my hand on her sacrum. Then I'd super charge her sacral chakra with qi. Then all of a sudden she'd suddenly be in the mood haha. Then (as I was still doing Chia's method at this time, which is probably why I was so sex crazy in the first place) I'd do the power lock and big draw and circulate my yang qi through her MCO and that would give her orgasms in each chakra as it passed through them, and then draw in her yin jing on run it through my MCO which would also feel very good for me.

 

The draw back to this method though was the next day I would feel a lot of her emotional issues and have do deal with them.

 

But anyways how do you flex the pineal gland?

Edited by dmattwads

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I think people should be mindful, when developing vital energy, of the relationship between sexual desire and sexual energy. The idea is to be abundant with life and vitality without impulsiveness and emotional imbalance.

 

The Yellow Emperor's "10 Questions," found at the Mawangdui site along with the second oldest available texts of the Dao De Jing, describes the importance of sexual energy as the most important of human energy, saying that "When sexual energy is stifled, the hundred channels become ill."

 

It also talks about following the cyclical nature of Heaven's energy being used up and replenished monthly. So the idea for "the spirit to remain in the body" is to learn how to make love in way that is not agitated - and this attitude will help the sexual energy to remain in abundance within.

 

One must also release stagnant energy at night and breathe fresh new energy into the perennial areas in the morning. This appears to be the origins chi gong, and of later sexual energy related developments, which arose with Taoist schools following the 8th century.

 

So, be aware of this balance, so as not to "throw the baby out with the bathwater" in "skillfully governing energy and amassing vitality." Do not be afraid of sexual energy which is the source of the sexual desire. It should be welcomed into the body, nurture the body, and allowed to pass in a natural cycle reflecting the movements of Heaven :) .

 

 

from: "Sex, Health, and Long Life:.."

 

"The aim of daytime breathing is that the exhalation and
inhalation should be gentle, ears and eyes clear, with a very
subtle mood of joy, not suffering internal degeneration, so the
body does not die prematurely from illness.

 

"The aim of nighttime breathing is that respiration be deep,
long, and slow, causing the ears not to hear, so one can sleep
peacefully. The higher and lower souls rest in the body, so one
can live long."

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I'm not sure how one "flexes" the pineal gland? but I'd like to know how.

 

Since I don't know how to do that, a few years ago I had another trick that I don't use anymore because I realized it was manipulation.

 

So a few years ago after my divorce I went dating crazy. Having done energy healing through my hands I did know how to project qi that way. So what I'd do on a date is if it got to a "make out session" but if the girl still seemed reluctant to go "all the way" I'd place my hand on her sacrum. Then I'd super charge her sacral chakra with qi. Then all of a sudden she'd suddenly be in the mood haha. Then (as I was still doing Chia's method at this time, which is probably why I was so sex crazy in the first place) I'd do the power lock and big draw and circulate my yang qi through her MCO and that would give her orgasms in each chakra as it passed through them, and then draw in her yin jing on run it through my MCO which would also feel very good for me.

 

The draw back to this method though was the next day I would feel a lot of her emotional issues and have do deal with them.

 

But anyways how do you flex the pineal gland?

 

Well I have a permanent magnetic bliss in the center of my brain. When I use my intention then I can transmit energy out of the center of my brain. When I do this then the right vagus nerve begans pulsating and you can see my neck pulsating and this means the pineal gland is pulling up the lower body energy -- including the anaerobic bacteria also. So the brain leaches out the toxins also - which is why I had to use antiseptics all the time like vinegar or garlic, etc. Sex is dirty. haha.

 

So basically I was reversing the normal subconscious process of desire in the mind as chi energy then going down through the medulla oblongata through the cerebospinal fluid to create the semen for ejaculation. I could literally just dry out my balls by flexing my pineal gland, pulling up the sex fluids, and then turning it into "yin chi" energy.

 

The problem with this is it's called False Fire of the Heart - it's not real chi energy. It's still jing energy and so then it depletes the jing energy over time. So yeah in full lotus then the perineum takes in the female jing energy.

 

Yeah I didn't do this just for sex energy but any lower emotional energy blockage. Like a couple years ago I fasted for 10 days and just lived off the lower emotional blockages. So I was converting jing to chi energy - taking in all the extra emotional blockages of the females and then transmitting chi energy back to them.

 

Umm - yeah people were having exorcisms. But I did that when I healed them also - like I exorcised my mom's liver blockage and she was screaming bloody murder at me - that was from strong chi energy - but I had never seen that kind of anger from a person. Since I had been fasting for 8 days on just half a glass of water so my energy was really pure and then I'm just blasted with all this screaming. haha. So that was one of the main reasons I stopped practicing.

 

Anyway so yeah I did clear out people's liver blockages by flexing my pineal gland and also lung sadness but the main thing was the sex energy -- and then after about 40 mutual climaxes then the heart chakra opens up. So I would be converting jing to chi -- then orgasm and then deeper orgasm by more jing to chi - and so slowly the chi energy builds up for both people.

 

A Little About Sexual Tantra …

http://www.meditationexpert.com/meditation-techniques/m_sexual_tantra.html

 

As Bodri points out this is a very limited practice - you can do it for health healing and real love - and so yeah it is great in the sense that Western modern culture does not even know what real love is - that it is from the male chi energy going into the female and the female jing energy going into the male. And the energy cycling like that. So you can heal lower emotional blockages.

 

Qigong master Chunyi Lin said he does not practice this since the energy he gets back is not nearly as much as he is giving out since it is jing energy being taken in and it takes a lot of jing energy to make chi energy.

 

I just ate tons of meat by dumpster diving food for free. haha. Then I ate tons of garlic as antiseptic and then tons of greens to counteract the garlic.

 

Yeah it was out of control - biking ten miles a day, reading a book in full lotus while having mutual orgasms in public - I did that for five years. I also used tea tree oil as antiseptic - but I overdosed on that a couple times - pretty scary as it overactivates your parasympathetic nervous system and then you can't breathe for a while.

 

Actually that reminds me that the Bushmen relied also on "terpenes" as an antiseptic they used during their healing dances.

 

So other terpenes I've used -- thymol from the wild bergamot growing in our field - umm.. has a couple names. thymol is in Thyme of course and it's used in mouthwash also.

 

Vinegar is a better antiseptic than alcohol - ummm... anyway I'm not advocating this tantra practice but just saying I did do it.

 

One of the craziest moments was when I was in full lotus in Taco Bell and this prostitute -- African-American - she is got her butt in my face -- doing a dance - there were two other females sitting together on the other side -- just in total shock. I'm just transmitting energy into the prostitute and we're having mutual climaxes. Then -- the pimp comes in all decked out in like purple felt hat with blue feather sticking out and fancy green suit - something wild like that and he's got a John customer with him - all AFrican-American. So then she points to me - this skinny white dude - and she says she doesn't need the customer since she's cumming already. She was laughing but then she went with the John. The two females on the other side of the Taco Bell were just looking at me like wtf and I just went back to reading my book like nothing ever happened. haha.

 

But yeah I don't need to "flex" my pineal gland - I can feel if my energy is getting sucked out of me. Like I mentioned before - I was reading in a cafe maybe a month ago - and I was not in full lotus and not flexing my pineal gland. The young female - like young college age - she lingers in front of me with her backside facing me as she is "cleaning." I used to get that manuever all the time in fastfood restaurants - the female would linger in front of my both while she was mopping - with her backside to me. haha.

 

Anyway so this time I'm just reading my book - not even looking at the female - I just notice she is doing this because all of sudden my eye balls are fluttering. I can feel the shen spirit biophotons shooting out of my eyes. The words of the pages are fluttering because the energy is going out of my eyes from my pineal gland. So she was sucking up my energy.

 

I suppose at that point I could have stopped reading and then chanting japa in my mind to empty out my mind so that it then pulls my energy back into my brain - the lower body energy - and I suppose pulls her jing energy into my body also to make up for the energy loss.

Edited by pythagoreanfulllotus

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How was it that you got the feeling of the various parts of the inside of your brain in the first place. The only one time I can remember where I actually felt my brain was that instance a few weeks ago when I felt sensation radiate from my heart up the left side of my neck and into my head and then eventually inside to my brain, but even then while I was able to feel the left side of my brain I was unable to distinguish the various parts of it. How did you get to that point.

 

As I was saying since I can't distinguish my pineal gland I could not tell you what was going on with that, but there have been times when I felt a lot of buzzing in my lower dan tien and it was at these times that I would also get a lot of that buttocks display behavior from females in public places as well. I was in the book store once a few years ago and I'm sitting there checking out some books and I notice my lower dan tien buzzing big time. During the time I was sitting there at least three females just happened to come at various times to the same section of book shelf which was right in front of my face and stop there to "check out books" while sticking their ass in my face. By the third female the buzzing had dissipated and then no more females did that lol.

 

So how is it that you got to the point where you were able to feel your brain with enough sensitivity to distinguish the various parts of it?

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How was it that you got the feeling of the various parts of the inside of your brain in the first place. The only one time I can remember where I actually felt my brain was that instance a few weeks ago when I felt sensation radiate from my heart up the left side of my neck and into my head and then eventually inside to my brain, but even then while I was able to feel the left side of my brain I was unable to distinguish the various parts of it. How did you get to that point.

 

As I was saying since I can't distinguish my pineal gland I could not tell you what was going on with that, but there have been times when I felt a lot of buzzing in my lower dan tien and it was at these times that I would also get a lot of that buttocks display behavior from females in public places as well. I was in the book store once a few years ago and I'm sitting there checking out some books and I notice my lower dan tien buzzing big time. During the time I was sitting there at least three females just happened to come at various times to the same section of book shelf which was right in front of my face and stop there to "check out books" while sticking their ass in my face. By the third female the buzzing had dissipated and then no more females did that lol.

 

So how is it that you got to the point where you were able to feel your brain with enough sensitivity to distinguish the various parts of it?

 

 

Qigong master Chunyi Lin said I had an "enlightenment experience." I just trained real hard when I was 29 -- I did it to finish my masters degree at the U of MN - so no one could hassle me. haha. I had student monies so I could afford an organic vegan diet and then I read meditation books and then meditated at least four hours a day. I worked just on the weekends - and I didn't exercise that much. I had a car and I drove the Spring Forest Qigong classes or guild meetings - once a month.

 

So I did that for six months - no t.v. - -just very little email - no internet otherwise - no socializing except one friend who was into meditation....

 

So yeah I got strong heat in the lower tan tien and the Level 3 class was a week away and I knew we learned fasting - so I figured I would jump ahead. I had read in the "Taoist Yoga: Alchemy and Immortality" book that when the lower tan tien really kicks in the heat then you can do the fasting.

 

So I was not hungry and so I just switched to meditating at least six hours a day - and then as the week went on I just had half a glass of water - but then my channels kept opening up, the electromagnetic energy got stronger, and then first I felt my kidneys get real hot and then my thymus and then I started to feel the middle of my brain get hot.

 

Then the top of my head got soft and was pulsating and the centers of my palms and feet were pulsating with electromagnetic energy. My breathing was minimal and I had water created internally in the center of my brain and it would just flow down into my throat. So I figured it was some sort of electryolysis process creating water so I didn't need to drink water.

 

I needed less sleep as the week went on - five hours a night. Then when I went to the LEvel 3 retreat - it was a big conference room full of people but I could single out this dude near the front - I could smell him like he smelled like rotting flesh like death. Then he stood up and said he came up from Arizona to get special healing and then the qigong masters said that they can smell cancer like rotting flesh death smell so I figured I could smell his cancer.

 

So then I went up to Chunyi - I never told him I had been fasting - but I just asked him: "What should I do?" He said: "Let me read your aura." Then he went into the Emptiness quick and came out and said: "Keep your mouth shut." I said - "You mean when I am meditating?" I realized I had been keeping it slightly open and so it was dry. He said yes and then he left the room as it was the break and I went to my sit to wait for the break to end.

 

Suddenly the middle of my brain was ON FIRE and I realized that Chunyi was working to open up my third eye - the fire sensation was so strong I could not handle it. I just wanted it to end. haha. So then when Chunyi was in full lotus meditating I could see yellow forms shaped like humans forming out of the top of his head and one would form and then break off and then it would float out into the room to heal people. Then another one would form and break off, etc. and so he said someone could see this and so he explained they were his "yin spirits" going out to heal people. But then I saw yellow forms shaped like humans float into the room from outside - we were in a remote forest Christian retreat camp from like the 1950s - and so I didn't say anything again but Chunyi said someone could see this so he explained that they were dead people as spirits coming to him to get healed and that this happens to him regularly. I had just read about that in the biography of Phra Achran Mun, the most famous Thai Buddhist meditation master - and so I have not read of that since then - but that was corroboration of what Chunyi had said.

 

So anyway I went to work that Monday and I explained to a coworker how I hadn't had any food for eight days and I felt awesome but then -- oh yeah then I was working alone in the backroom and this female manager came in - not my direct manager - but suddenly I had strong electromagnetic fields shooting out of the center of my brain! It was a field of electromagnetic energy and I could then sense her thoughts as telepathy. Then when her boss and my boss came into the room suddenly this female coworker manager said to our boss that she thought I should get promoted to be a manager. This was way out of the ordinary since I was not even qualified to be a manager as I was just an assistant administrative position but education wise I was over-qualified - I was the most educated person working there. haha.

 

Anyway so yeah I went to lunch since I was working I figure I would break my fast - and so I had a vegan tofu greens soup -but it had sea salt in it and it tasted like complete POISON to me!!

 

Then when I meditated in my room there was this spacetime vortex of the room spinning around me! That really freaked me out. When I came out of that meditation I felt like my mind and my body were really not the real me. So I threw out (recycled) my old journal of 500 pages - and I even threw out my Yan Xin meditation qigong cassette because I felt like I just didn't need it anymore.

 

Oh yeah when I was hanging with my qigong friend - he was a friend from my activist days and we had lived together and we both did music and we were in the local anarchist cafe - and so we were not talking about meditation and he was at the next table. But again I could feel electromagnetic energy shooting out of the center of my brain into him. I just sat there hoping he would not notice!! haha.

 

Suddenly he cries out - "Hey what are you doing to me!"

 

Yeah and that was the same day when I saw this female I knew and she was about 15 feet from me but when our eyes met suddenly I knew she had this orgasmic reaction to me - like a real orgasm - as I had the same experience internally and I knew somehow that she had the same thing. But it was so bizarre to me that my mind did not process it - -it just happened but I did not analyze the import of it. I think I was like - wow now I'm literally a chick magnet. haha.

 

So yeah then I went to do my weekly healing practice on my mom and she just screamed bloody murder at me and so I ate a bunch of food - and anyway I healed her and she actually fell asleep -- but when I healed her I felt really strong electromagnetic energy going into her and pulling out her blockages.

 

Well the days these things happened varied - I should have wrote it all down. I went to the Guild practice session that weekend after the Level 3 retreat. Jim Nance asked me to explain my fasting experience to our healing practice group and then this old lady asked me to do a healing on her. So she was sitting in a chair and I didn't touch her but I forgot not to pull the energy blockages out of the top center of the skull. So I did that by accident and I felt this heavy electromagnetic blob get pulled out of the top center of her skull. As soon as I felt it she immediately just bawled - even though she couldn't see what I was doing. She just kept bawling and she was bawling for at least 15 minutes and someone else had their arm around her. My local qigong friend was walking by as everyone was leaving and I said - you're not going to believe what just happened and then the lady walked past still bawling and someone with their arm around her. But then I saw her maybe a couple months later and she smiled at me as she knew I had just made an honest mistake.

 

So my mom called me two weeks later to say she wanted another healing and that the healing I did was the "difference between night and day" and she no longer needed surgical stockings nor to keep her legs elevated all the time. So I said how I had stopped practicing since she had yelled at me so bad. Then she said I was just lazy. haha.

 

Anyway I didn't realize I had done an exorcism of her liver blockage. So I told all this to Chunyi at the next Level 3 class I took - and he said I had an enlightenment experience. When I told him about how I had thrown away the Yan Xin meditation tape he said that my mind was confused. So then I kept wondering about the difference between consciousness and the Emptiness and it took me a few years to figure that it was due to the complementary opposites of reality. Consciousness is the light energy but Emptiness is not light - Emptiness is pure being as awareness but it's more like a spacetime vortex. But the reason they are not the same - consciousness will go into the Emptiness eternally - this is because of the yin-yang dynamics of reality. I go into this in more detail - about symmetric logic, etc. as I've mentioned. But anyway from my study of nondualism I had been thinking of the Emptiness as a static realm -- like once you achieve it then it is beyond good and evil - and beyond clean and dirty, etc. and so I had experienced the Emptiness but after that I didn't feel like I needed to keep purifying my energy. So was eating meat and then eating out of dumpsters for food and I went into the tantra practice as females were chasing after me.

 

Like once I was in a bookstore and this female literally stalked me around the bookstore. haha.

 

Anyway so that was my confusion - obviously you have to keep purifying your energy and keep storing it up and it wasn't until almost ten years later after I kept studying the book "Taoist Yoga: Alchemy and Immortality" did I discover the reason why the room was spinning around me. So it says that there is dizziness if your spirit starts leaving your body before it is surrounded by enough chi energy. So you have to store your spirit in your lower tan tien to then encapsulate the spirit inside chi energy to power the spirit travel. So if only I had studied the book more at the time then I would have been prepared when it had happened. But that is a very intense book.

 

Anyway so what happened is then I took another Level 3 class and Chunyi Lin put his finger to the center of my forehead and he shot this laser bliss into the center of my brain - and even though I had stopped practicing my energy channels had not fully closed up. So then I was super sensitive of energy - I could read people's energy through the walls in the other apartments - and it was not fun. So I kept moving and looking for a better place to practice meditation. By now I was done with graduate school so no school money and no car anymore and so I was exercising too much and eating not pure and then I moved nine times trying to find a pure place to meditate - no luck. Then anyway I wondered if the magnetic bliss in the center of my brain would go away and so I completely stopped practicing for a couple months and the magnetic bliss in the center of the brain was the same. So I figured it was permanent. That was back in 2001.

Edited by pythagoreanfulllotus
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So basically keep up the meditation and things keep happening.

 

Last night was the first social gathering I'd been to for a while, and first one since my kundalini experience last week as well. So some students had a backyard party with lights in the trees and such and that was very pretty. But you know when something gets so over the top it freaks you out? lol. Well (I'm trying to think of how to put this) ... no matter where I went I found myself surrounded by females, and they were all talking to me eagerly and touching me when they talked a lot, and then as the night went on and they had had more to drink lol, they all started telling me how they loved me and I was the greatest and it was starting to get embarrassing and surreal, and they kept wanting to hug me over and over and one picked up her guitar and in front of the entire party dedicated a few songs to me and I got beet red and just wanted to turn invisible lol.

 

But it was so weird. I mean I remember in the past when I actually wanted to meet a girl at a get together like that and tried I was invisible and now that I don't want to find a girl they everywhere... life can be so ironic haha. So having a bit of a sense of humor I decided to mess with them and told them about how I'd really been enjoying listening to Ajahn Brahm and how it made me want to become a monk, and then they all gasped and were like "noooooo!!!!" haha that was funny. But anyways you know when something is just so over the top its no longer fun or flattering but freaky? lol

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So basically keep up the meditation and things keep happening.

 

Last night was the first social gathering I'd been to for a while, and first one since my kundalini experience last week as well. So some students had a backyard party with lights in the trees and such and that was very pretty. But you know when something gets so over the top it freaks you out? lol. Well (I'm trying to think of how to put this) ... no matter where I went I found myself surrounded by females, and they were all talking to me eagerly and touching me when they talked a lot, and then as the night went on and they had had more to drink lol, they all started telling me how they loved me and I was the greatest and it was starting to get embarrassing and surreal, and they kept wanting to hug me over and over and one picked up her guitar and in front of the entire party dedicated a few songs to me and I got beet red and just wanted to turn invisible lol.

 

But it was so weird. I mean I remember in the past when I actually wanted to meet a girl at a get together like that and tried I was invisible and now that I don't want to find a girl they everywhere... life can be so ironic haha. So having a bit of a sense of humor I decided to mess with them and told them about how I'd really been enjoying listening to Ajahn Brahm and how it made me want to become a monk, and then they all gasped and were like "noooooo!!!!" haha that was funny. But anyways you know when something is just so over the top its no longer fun or flattering but freaky? lol

 

Sure. Maybe you should start charging money. haha. I used to jokingly call myself a psychic gigolo. Of course I never charged money but I did have a female coworker stalk me. Literally like - I worked after everyone else left since I needed the paper that they had to put back into boxes. Yes I shuffled paper for 10 years. haha. This one female though would stay after doing backside displays while I was in full lotus shuffling paper. So she was too stressed out - our job had gotten worse since the nonprofit secretly had leased this new speed dialer and then were trying to downsize the workers - and anyway - so she was one of the few females left and her jing energy was low. So I just charged her up and she kept coming back for more - and so that is how she dealt with her stress to compete with the males. So then she got promoted to being a manager and the same thing - I just kept charging her up. So then she got promoted to being the director and she was still stalking me. haha. I mean I would wait later and later to go into work hoping she had finally gone home. One time I waited until 2:30 a.m. and she still showed up at work. I really don't know -- I finally said I was going to say something to the boss and she got really upset - you're not going to tell them are you? haha.

 

Anyway after so many mutual climaxes with her then our heart chakras really opened up and we had this serious love going on so that when we were physically separated there was heart break and when in the same building there was magnetic connection like our bodies were interwoven.

 

But at the same time I had to use antiseptics all the time while I was having mutual climaxes with her all the time. I also had to eat a lot of meat to keep my jing energy charged up since her jing energy was so low. She lived with these perv males who would always suck off her energy to deconvert her electromagnetic spirit back down to her lower chakra.

 

Anyway so finally she said: "You're very charming but too bad you can't talk." Since the whole time she was just doing backside displays, etc. and so I just then overdosed on my tea tree oil and proceeded to "chat" it up with her and then she left at about 1:30 and I just crashed as I had O.D.d and I woke up to the morning manager being super pissed at me. He was trying to finish my job - but what my job had become was ridculous since I didn't even have a work schedule anymore. I was literally "on emergency call" at all times. I had to check my email since I didn't have a phone and I didn't even have a computer - and so I would bike into work whenever they needed me. And it was just because the supercomputer speed dialer had stole the turf pieces of paper - it was a phone canvassing nonprofit - calling people for money. So I looked it up since they wanted me to leave the turf dirty - like call people eight times instead of five times. I looked it up and it is illegal in Californa to harrass people like that - there is a law about the number of times you can call a person as the percentage of the total people you are calling. I didn't even mention that to them as it was not the law in Minnesota and obviously they didn't care. haha. So that is why I no longer had a job schedule - what I did once a week was now needing to be done over and over as the phone callers kept needing to call the pieces of paper more often.

 

Yeah it was all super stupid but I had to break up fights since people were scared they would get fired so they turned against each other fighting over pieces of paper with more money on it. haha.

 

So I smelled like crap so bad from giving the one female so many mutual climaxes and then since I OD'd on tea tree oil then I used garlic as my antiseptic but then I smelled like garlic so bad like the rotten eggs. haha.

 

But then the love was so strong with this female coworker but I was not even physically attracted to her. haha. But we had so many mutual climaxes that it went beyond any sex aspect - it was just all heart love electromagnetic energy and so I could not even stand being in the same building with her and then pretending like it was just a working relationship.

 

So finally my department was completely downsized and so then the female coworker who had stalked me and then she got promoted twice - so then she created a whole new job for me - but I didn't really have a place to work in the office and normally I worked at nights since I had to wait for everyone to leave. So now I was really stinking up the office and the place was fake for the most part anyway. haha. It had become corporatized and I discovered how they relied on Wall St Rockefeller money and they didn't really do much activism at all. So they also destroyed a unionization drive despite pretending to be part of a Blue-Green Alliance.

 

Yeah so I just quit with no notice and the female coworker asked me if I wanted to talk about it. haha. But I had already said I quit - after ten years of working there. No notice, no discussion. So but before I quit she had me sign this form - maybe a couple weeks before -- about how I had been "disloyal" for the past four months. See they needed a "fall guy" and so somehow -- because they were not making budget since the pieces of paper had gotten put into this supercomputer and basically got lost. It was a serious mismanagement problem. Anyway I signed the paper that someone had typed up saying I was "disloyal" since I knew it was my female coworker - now "director" - that it was her job on the line.

 

Anyway so that was the big finale to my psychic mutual climax lifestyle. I then biked for 250 miles on a bicycle, dumpster diving and taking breaks in full lotus and then visiting the Buddhist monasteries set up by the SE Asian immigrant communities, etc.

 

Oh yeah a year later that female stalker coworker called my sister where I used to live and she left a message saying she had my vacation pay and then she mailed me a check for $1000. That was a year after I had quit. haha. Hilarious. Yeah for 10 years I only worked about 15 hours a week on average and then dumpster dived for food and I wrode bicycle 10 miles everyday through the long Minnesota winters and then read one scholarly book a day and then had psychic mutual climaxes with females all day for the second half of that time - five years.

Edited by pythagoreanfulllotus

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That's a good question and one that I have been pondering as well. I know that I really enjoy listening to Ajahn Braham talk and its not just the content (which is excellent) but also just listing to him in and of itself is very nice too. He definitely has an appeal and a draw to him that makes him very likable IMO.

 

The Dali Lama is also very well liked. Listening to Chunyi Lin also feels very good. I've noticed many of the talks by monks and nuns that I listen to online have a wonderful feel to them.

 

It does seem to be uncanny the radical change in the way people relate to me as I continue to meditate.

 

*last night's adventure did make me really see the wisdom in the precepts that monks have which in the past I thought were the kind of "kill joy" rules I had escaped from when I left the church lol.

Edited by dmattwads

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My recent discoveries show the following:

 

You have to have information how sexual energies work in order to transform your sexual desire, obviously. This does not mean controlling them. More of that at the bottom of this post. If this information is not given through meditation, wisdom comes through an secondary source as information and is then applied, if one feels it is correct.

 

That means, if one is uncertain that things wont work out for oneself, irritations are being created. Bias that has to be overcome with extends the initial process.

 

So ask yourself:

 

Do I want change?

Or do I want to live out and find out what is it all about sexuality that I do not yet understand.

 

If you want change, then you must drop "feels good/bad". The self-experience in this case (as always) is much more important and mostly does not feel good. But that just a matter of the polluted ego by our media, dont worry.

If you want to try it all out, then DO SO! By all means. Really. Have Sex, lots of it! At best when you are already meditating and feel the heavy impact of it, how you get drained, how you fall asleep all the time during attempting to meditate and generally have no drive to do anything.

 

I am grateful that I came to a stage in meditation where I witnessed how my higher aspect has made changes in my body. How chakras opened, how nerval pathways opened first with pain and then all flew into joy. And most importantly when your heart opens... THIS! is what will make you forget the world you life in, THIS! will make you realize what you are wasting.

 

If you are into pornography, then I have to tell you now, before you maybe learn it later anyway by yourself, that you have officially become a victim of energy-vampirism which happens all the time in our society. You have to remove that triggering in your life, you want to come to a point where 10 naked women can dance infront of you and nothing moves in your pants, because you KNOW how much more precious your own sexual energy is! That is a goal along the road of understanding energies! A very, very important one.

 

And when you dive deeper into energy practices (like you are with Taoism at the best source!), how everything connects and you consciously make choices for your own life and direct yourself right on the pathway of immortality.

 

I always say to myself in times of doubt and desperation: There are so many spiritual beings all around me waiting for me to realize my spiritual nature and I am here contemplating to eat that fat cake or jerk off to that porn. In no way ever I am going back that road. I learn how to work with energies to gradually understands what immortality truely means.

 

Once you are there and have... tasted that nectar of the most tiniest but already so incredible powerful parts of your eternal nature, you finally awaken and then PASSIVELY through your actions awaken the WHOLE world!

 

This, my dear Visa-advertisement, is priceless.

 

 

tl;dr: We do not want to control a desire, we want to understand what a desire is that wants to tell us that it wants to be controlled. Understanding creates wisdom and you naturally drop what you do not need. Controlling you do your sexual energy, but not the desire which is of a psychic nature. A unwholesome pattern of your mind that wants to be understood. Only a fool fights a war, wants to control something with force, he does not yet understand.

Edited by 4bsolute
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well , by some strange reason this post has popped back up exactly 4 years this month since i posted it.

I have to say there has been alot of change in them years , becoming internally multi orgasmic and then realising that there is alot more to cultivation , but it is a fascinating topic , so many layers and experiences away from the traditional friction based orgasm.

Shantam nityama being one of the masters of this whole energetic aspect.

I hope we all find peace in whatever it is we are searching for.

:-)x

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I am grateful that I came to a stage in meditation where I witnessed how my higher aspect has made changes in my body. How chakras opened, how nerval pathways opened first with pain and then all flew into joy. And most importantly when your heart opens... THIS! is what will make you forget the world you life in, THIS! will make you realize what you are wasting.

 

Hi,

please, could you say something more about this? Thank you ^_^

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