natural

What is behind the compulsion to be correct? Ego?

Recommended Posts

Is it innate?  

Or learned?

My nieces are good at communicating through their use of words to a point.

Once they feel misunderstood or not respected, they resort to violence.

Biting one another.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Until just before first stage enlightenment the human persona (mask) is largely operated by an entity that can be called the Personal Will.   

 

The highest asset of the PW is self-esteem.  Thus it will maintain its self-belief at the cost of physical health and emotional relationships.  It most certainly does not wish to be proven wrong

 

The PW operates the defence systems for the human, forcing the human to get its act together - to protect the PW.  

 

At first stage enlightenment the PW changes from defence to creativity. 

  • Like 1
  • Confused 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, natural said:

Is it innate?  

Or learned?

My nieces are good at communicating through their use of words to a point.

Once they feel misunderstood or not respected, they resort to violence.

Biting one another.

 

Evolution. Both innate and conditioned responses. The human species has always been violent with very few exceptions and no belief system or religion will cure the problem!

  • Like 1
  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree that it’s probably a combination of conditioned and evolutionary responses. Believing we are correct or even simply convincing others of this whether or not we actually feel that way gives us a sense of security, a sense of power, often false but reassuring nonetheless. And of course when we are correct we have a better chance of getting the big piece of chicken or the fertile partner.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What behind the compulsion to be 'correct' ?   It goes back a long way ..... if you where not correct about your observations and what to do about them in our far past , eg hunter gatherer societies ... which we did for a looooong time - hence the 'brain wiring '   you could quickly end up dead , food for something, starving, lost,  etc .   

 

Nowadays, we have all sorts of devices and arrangements to preserve the stupid and inept .....people can get away with being very 'incorrect'  making bad decisions, etc . but the old wiring  is still in place  so they  can still feel the need  and compulsion to be correct .... even though the cause to be correct is not present .... most of the time .

 

 

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The root is in fear of death. Every position we hold establishes a layer of our identity. To be proven wrong is mistaken to be a blow to our self-identity, hence akin to a mini-death. That’s why people don’t like to lose and always try to win. If they can’t, they will resort to violence of one form or another. 

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 minutes ago, dwai said:

The root is in fear of death.

 

I am not sure that is true.  How many millions dying of cancer will try a different philosophy of medicine and health?     To do that would be to cast doubt on their decades of belief in doctors and pharmaceuticals.

 

Who even knows that they are following the Germ Theory of Disease?    Better just to die believing that they have done their best.  

 

A local woman with a breast lump, believing, had both breasts removed.   She would not discuss with me alternative approaches - believing very strongly in her doctors.

 

She had various stays in hospital of up to a week dealing with the infections from the surgery. 

 

Of course the cancer returned and with various bouts of chemo, she could hardly walk and needed to pull around an oxygen cylinder.  After 6 months of very low quality of life, she was back walking freely and with hair regrowing.

 

After all that, when I discussed alternatives with her, she was a good deal more tolerant - but still not willing to practice any.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

- What is behind the compulsion to be correct? Ego?

 

A very fervent interest for the truth.

I'd say.

 

 

Edited by dawn90

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, natural said:

Can some one please insert? embed Marvin Gaye,s  What's going on here?

 

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, natural said:

Once they feel misunderstood or not respected, they resort to violence.

I can understand it.

 

I mean I would pick other options, like becoming sarcastic, over violence, but I can understand feeling frustrated and annoyed when you try to understand and be polite to others, only for them to treat you like you don't care or isn't allowed to voice your thoughts

 

And you might even brush it off once or twice(or a few times more) but when it's frequent...well, it sucks.It kinda feels like "what's the point" of being all that only to be met with such disrespect and/or lack of acknowledgement of your worth as a person?It becomes such a downer after a while...

 

As for 

Quote

What is behind the compulsion to be correct? Ego?

 

I don't have a "definitive/this is it" answer, so in my opinion I think the answer to this is divided in three "options":

 

1.Pride(no one wants to admit they're wrong).

Ex: No big boss wanta to admit that a "lowly worker" is right when they themselves are wrong.

 

2.Fear(most people fear being wrong)

Ex: Those that follow cults do not want to admit that they wasted years believing into something fake, or those that fear they might actually not know what comes next

 

3.Hope/Desire(everyone wishes that reality is/can/will be as they believe it is/will be)

Ex: If their future isn't/won't be like they believe it will, this can break someone's spirit for the present suffering.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, dwai said:

The root is in fear of death. Every position we hold establishes a layer of our identity. To be proven wrong is mistaken to be a blow to our self-identity, hence akin to a mini-death. That’s why people don’t like to lose and always try to win. If they can’t, they will resort to violence of one form or another. 

 

Nah ..... just  some people  .

 

I dont mind loosing at all 

 

Spoiler

man-losing-at-strip-poker-picture-id1753

 

 

  • Haha 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, old3bob said:

eating crow does not taste very good ;-)

download.jpg.2a583c30a335d4f19f97fe3da1f44da0.jpg

 

I will gladly take your advice on this, but wonder about how hungry one must be as well as wily one must be to eat crow.

  • Haha 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

playing the game of chess can be quite revealing of our ego's, in some cases it can be played in an artistic way but it is mostly played as several battles that try to culminate in winning the war... and loosing such a war to a 12 year old kid can give rise to or reveal all sorts of egoic convolutions.  

Edited by old3bob
  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I could never eat a crow.

They are far too intelligent and interesting creatures. 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, steve said:

I could never eat a crow.

They are far too intelligent and interesting creatures. 

 

this may date me, however if i recall correctly there was no bag limit nor a Sunday prohibition on hunting them

  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 minutes ago, natural said:

 

I will gladly take your advice on this, but wonder about how hungry one must be as well as wily one must be to eat crow.

 

if one is hungry enough for the truth and honest enough to pursue it then eating crow if need be won't stop them...

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
16 minutes ago, steve said:

I could never eat a crow.

They are far too intelligent and interesting creatures. 

 

(eating crow in the context meant is recognizing one's mistake or one's egotistic fault)

Edited by old3bob
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I may have mentioned it before but in the late 70's my older brother carpooled to work with a fellow who was making the minimum wage and with 6 kids and a wife relying on him as the "bread winner" they would stop and collect roadkill as they went to work in the predawn hours...

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

From American Indian ways: 

"Coyote Symbolism and Meaning – Coyote symbolizes playfulness, adaptability. The ability to see the truth in a situation, knowledge, and intelligence are some of the common metaphorical meanings associated with the spirit animal coyote."  which includes being, "wily enough"

6c73e7010a3ff5ef8bcce734a902f766.png.9d7db327f501e1ff758dbb05b800356a.png

Edited by old3bob
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Just now, old3bob said:

"waste not want not" if safely edible.

 

 

Amen, amen and amen!

 

Honestly, I never broke bread or tried to eat their meager victuals, however true to my experience he and his family were extremely generous with sharing whatever they had.

Poor = great generosity!

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites