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Is life long celibacy even possible ???

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On 9/2/2020 at 12:08 PM, exorcist_1699 said:

Passions and sex drives are so strong, especially those in our youth, that only an emptied ,mindless Mind with no intention can counteract and sublimate them  . All minds are   the tools of those passions and drives, yet thinking that they are working for  the  interest of  their own selves,  their real owners  ( in fact the host is  outcast to a  hidden corner of the body  where   people  sometime  call it  dantian , sometime  call it  the Magic Gateway ..,  it  is a guest ,  the false self , who is  really in charge ) . If people are in capable of bringing  back  their real Self  , then no matter  how hard they try living away from the crowd , on the  high mountain, into  a deep cave..  all are  just some kinds of  formalism in  life , to the end , futile.

 

It is a chicken and egg problem.  Passions and sex drives can be dealt with by stilling the mind.  But stilling the mind needs to deal with passions and sex drives.  

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All I will say is if you decide to be celibate, expect that it will deeply move energy within the unconscious mind. You better be prepared for the battle that confronts you as it could lead to excessive behaviors/emotions surfacing that are completely unexpected and can tip you off balance.

 

Will you overcome these obstacles or be dragged down with them.

Edited by idiot_stimpy
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Is life long celibacy even possible ???

 

Depends on what you mean by celibacy.

 

Without partners and offsprings you can easily be, and this will save you from a lot of things...

 

But fighting against sexuality and the need of ejaculation... You will lose eventually.

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I've been trying to retain since 5 years ago. I kinda feel that the real question really lies in whether one can control their sexual urges long enough for the rest of the life, whenever it arises. 

 

Which links with one's ability to control nocturnal emission, assuming that the circumstance is already conducive to retention e.g being single. When one retains long enough, it will feel like retaining is effortless and over even longer period of time, will make a person feel asexual.

 

But when nocturnal emission happens, one experiences chaser effect. The chaser effect usually gets more serious the longer one retains. At least from my experience. When that happens, there are changes that takes place in our body and also circumstances.

One of the main changes is the revitalization of sexual urges. So if one can stop nocturnal emission completely, the way to celibacy should be effortless.

 

 

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On 2/18/2021 at 4:05 PM, arthur said:

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But when nocturnal emission happens, one experiences chaser effect. The chaser effect usually gets more serious the longer one retains. At least from my experience. When that happens, there are changes that takes place in our body and also circumstances.

One of the main changes is the revitalization of sexual urges. So if one can stop nocturnal emission completely, the way to celibacy should be effortless.

 

 

 


The result of sex intercourse is same as nocturnal emission  as long as leakage of jing does happen. It  makes no differences whether it happened  in  sane state or deep sleep; or  whether it  is accompanied with wet dream or without wet dream ; or, whether via your own hands or via other sex's body.  In fact , people who adopt  the paying-attention-to-the-dantian way of cultivation  are especially  entangled by this problem for  the more jing and qi they have accumulated  at their abdomen, the more momentum /urge that force them to release it  , if not in awake state, then it likely in their dreams.

 

The sex drive will disguise as your own self , making you think that you are acting at your own will , for your own interest .

 

 

 

Edited by exorcist_1699

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Nocturnal emission is not the only problem.  When one progresses in cultivation, the sex urge creates a much bigger problem than normal persons.  During higher stages of cultivation/meditation, improper thoughts on sex, anger, fear.... not only erases years of hard work, but also severely damage the health.   It is the reason for clearing the mind.

 

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The bed chamber is internal without location the meeting of yin and yang to give birth to higher being, well being. One can become monk or priest and have a family no problem.

 

Mind can have many obstacles that we fabricate to prevent our journey to be better people.

 

So we can see no sex can be just as damaging as too much sex.

 

celibacy is a natural occurrence not mind driven. I was celibate for 13 years then I turned 14

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On 2020/9/18 at 6:58 PM, Master Logray said:

 

It is a chicken and egg problem.  Passions and sex drives can be dealt with by stilling the mind.  But stilling the mind needs to deal with passions and sex drives.  

 

Sex drive can be used as fuel burning for  attaining an emptied Mind , the initial condition is just the ability of mobilizing qi .

Passion and emotions , such as worries, jealousy , fear, vanity ...etc can also be used as fuels for it , not only jing and qi .

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12 hours ago, exorcist_1699 said:

 

Sex drive can be used as fuel burning for  attaining an emptied Mind , the initial condition is just the ability of mobilizing qi .

Passion and emotions , such as worries, jealousy , fear, vanity ...etc can also be used as fuels for it , not only jing and qi .

 

I have noticed that celibacy conserves energy and as the energy increases it adds energy to everything, including our imbalances. If done without mindfulness this can be very problematic as a mild temper can become a large temper, or a mild obsession becomes a big one. One the other hand if one is practicing mindfulness then making things louder can actually be of great benefit as it brings things to the awareness to be mindful of. It becomes to observe how craving is indeed to cause of suffering.  

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On 2021/2/22 at 12:12 AM, Master Logray said:

Nocturnal emission is not the only problem.  When one progresses in cultivation, the sex urge creates a much bigger problem than normal persons.  During higher stages of cultivation/meditation, improper thoughts on sex, anger, fear.... not only erases years of hard work, but also severely damage the health.   It is the reason for clearing the mind.

 

 

Our Self , is not just composed of  two big  chunks: the upper consciousness and the lower biological needs and drives . If we  look at  it through the Maslow's hierarchy of needs ,  from top to bottom , there are more layers : need of  self-fulfilment,  need to be respected, need to feeling safe.. and the bottom, biological needs of sex , food and shelter .  A male in depressed mood can be pressed  to  sex addiction , not only because he has accumulated lot of jing  in celibacy ; it is  just like some women who are urged to eating  snacks or buying clothes under stress  .  So, conversely,  those  emotions, whether they are suppressed , not being noticed , or fully sensed but not controllable  : fear , anger, jealousness, hatred , unrest .. can all be /  should be used as       ' fuels '  burning for the  emptied Mind . Or, doing / thinking it in the way around , it is the emptied Mind that  is  the  thorough , at one stroke way  to solve all troubles . 

 

Also it is  in this sense that doing our cultivation in earthly world is much more meaningful than doing it on the top of high mountain or in deep cave . In fact , only after having trained in those  earthly hardships,  can we  secure what we have achieved . 

 

Edited by exorcist_1699

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9 hours ago, exorcist_1699 said:

 

Our Self , is not just composed of  two big  chunks: the upper consciousness and the lower biological needs and drives . If we  look at  it through the Maslow's hierarchy of needs ,  from top to bottom , there are more layers : need of  self-fulfilment,  need to be respected, need to feeling safe.. and the bottom, biological needs of sex , food and shelter .  A male in depressed mood can be pressed  to  sex addiction , not only because he has accumulated lot of jing  in celibacy ; it is  just like some women who are urged to eating  snacks or buying clothes under stress  .  So, conversely,  those  emotions, whether they are suppressed , not being noticed , or fully sensed but not controllable  : fear , anger, jealousness, hatred , unrest .. can all be /  should be used as       ' fuels '  burning for the  emptied Mind . Or, doing / thinking it in the way around , it is the emptied Mind that  is  the  thorough , at one stroke way  to solve all troubles . 

 

Also it is  in this sense that doing our cultivation in earthly world is much more meaningful than doing it on the top of high mountain or in deep cave . In fact , only after having trained in those  earthly hardships,  can we  secure what we have achieved .

 

The training of Xing (approximately - Mind) has to be carried out both within meditation AND in the daily dealings in the outside world.  Otherwise the foundation is not stable and progress is slow.   The high mountain/cave is only for almost the final stage.  Historically some Taoists started their training in brothels. 

 

Using emptied mind as a tool to deal with emotional problems, is common nowadays, especially with pseudo-Buddhist teaching.  From Taoist standpoint, emptied mind is more a goal.  To achieve this state of mind, one needs to deal with emotions, body sensations like sex urges plus own thinkings/beliefs. 

 

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