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Satya

Keanu Reeves, Immortal

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I would very much like to be Keanu but when shaving this morning I noticed a flicker of emotion pass across my otherwise wooden features so I now think it unlikely that I am he.

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For breakfast I had a noisette of sprouted alfalfa seeds mixed with mongolian yaks milk with turmeric foam (obviously)... I would smoke a Marlborough Lite but only after sex so maybe once a year and as for the pump my water bed just exploded.

 

Nah ... he's not. (But I do like the vision of Apech all mixed up in an exploded water bed with turmeric foam and yaks milk)

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Nah ... he's not. (But I do like the vision of Apech all mixed up in an exploded water bed with turmeric foam and yaks milk)

 

 

You can tell who I am simply from my breakfast menu!!! Is this some kind of weird siddhi that you have developed?

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I would very much like to be Keanu but when shaving this morning I noticed a flicker of emotion pass across my otherwise wooden features so I now think it unlikely that I am he.

 

Well ... if he was you, he wouldnt let you know would he? They are sneaky like that - those immortals.

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You can tell who I am simply from my breakfast menu!!! Is this some kind of weird siddhi that you have developed?

 

Its a power I developed in Java .... I can 'channell' what you need for breakfast (maybe not what you want ) - in this case, for the emaciated 'space-ghost look' (especially when one is trying to get an actor to look like he has been living in an egg sack all his life) ; beaten egg white dry fried and one piece of dry rye toast and black coffee watered down 50% (thats not necessary, the cooffee bit ... Im just being cruel ... keeps 'em on their toes )

 

For you ... obviously, some flaked tuna.

 

Dont say nasty things about Keanu he is a really good guy .... he what ! .... He gave all the stunties a Harley each !

 

How come I didnt get one ! :angry:

 

What an arsehole !

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Well ... if he was you, he wouldnt let you know would he? They are sneaky like that - those immortals.

 

 

That is so convoluted weird and spooky that I have to believe it. We live in a world inhabited by immortals who are other people but do not let them know that they are being them.

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Its a power I developed in Java .... I can 'channell' what you need for breakfast (maybe not what you want ) - in this case, for the emaciated 'space-ghost look' (especially when one is trying to get an actor to look like he has been living in an egg sack all his life) ; beaten egg white dry fried and one piece of dry rye toast and black coffee watered down 50% (thats not necessary, the cooffee bit ... Im just being cruel ... keeps 'em on their toes )

 

For you ... obviously, some flaked tuna.

 

Dont say nasty things about Keanu he is a really good guy .... he what ! .... He gave all the stunties a Harley each !

 

How come I didnt get one ! :angry:

 

What an arsehole !

 

So while other people were lighting up light bulbs and setting fire to toilet paper you were delving into the dao of breakfast menus! Its at times like this I realise that I am not just chatting on the internet to a disparate bunch of oddballs but actually conversing with giants, accomplished masters of the highest order.

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So while other people were lighting up light bulbs and setting fire to toilet paper you were delving into the dao of breakfast menus! Its at times like this I realise that I am not just chatting on the internet to a disparate bunch of oddballs but actually conversing with giants, accomplished masters of the highest order.

 

Sometimes I wish I had learnt that setting fire to toilet paper skill

 

http://media.peopleofwalmart.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/5467.jpg

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Sometimes I wish I had learnt that setting fire to toilet paper skill

 

http://media.peopleofwalmart.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/5467.jpg

 

 

I don't think you should regret the path you chose for yourself ... or was chosen for you by some higher power. I think siddhis can get a little dull if everyone has the same skills ... I mean imagine a world filled with people all lighting toilet paper with their bare hands. No you deserve respect for the choices you made. I mean think of it ... if you ever find yourself alone and depressed in a hotel room wondering 'where did it all go wrong' you can just dial room service and get them to read out the menu ... and bingo omniscience will strike.

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Apech!

You really must stop giving away these secrets.

There are commercial issues here.

Some advertisers on here are charging $1,000+ for similar info, and getting it too.

Edited by GrandmasterP

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'smart enough to fix his own Harley motorcycles' .... and smart enough to know when NOT to take one on a bike run.

 

"Who is on the bike run this weekend ?"

 

(American accent - not Keanu ) " Oh yeah ... I will rent a Harley and come ! "

 

"Well, where we are going .... there's corners."

 

(American ) " ... and ... "

 

" Well ... you'd be better off on a little Ducati ... " (another Aussie): " ... or a Triumph."

 

(American ) " A Harley is the best motorcycle in the world! ... are you bringing yours Keanu ? "

 

" .... (mumbles ) .... "

 

" What's that ?"

 

" Ah ... no ... thanks ... I have to .... (mumbles ) .... "

 

(To me) ... "What about you?"

 

<sensing danger> "Oh ... I have to ..... <mumbles > .... too ." ;)

 

 

 

Dude had to show off didnt he ? I get a panicked call that afternoon.

 

- he high-sided and flipped it on a corner, went upside down, hit the turn arrows sign upside down in mid-air back first, took it and pole and concrete plug out and sign him and bike over the cliff and landed down there in the valley .... AND survived . . . . one of the special effects guy - seriously :laugh:

 

Harley ... best MC in the world .... r i i i i i ght ! Especially when trying to keep up with a Ducati :rolleyes:

 

And that was 3rd time I sensed danger (or extreme hassles) that actually happened, from events this 1 guy organised. He organised a canoeing trip once and they got stuck in a gorge for 2 days and nights while someone had to climb out for help...

 

Now when he suggests a trip, or event ;

 

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... if you ever find yourself alone and depressed in a hotel room wondering 'where did it all go wrong'

 

Good Lord Apech! You just described 75% of workers in the film industry there ! Just throw in some cocaine and a night spent watching Fight Club ... then ring up Nungali and talk confused rubbish on the phone at 2 am in the morning.

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That is so convoluted weird and spooky that I have to believe it. We live in a world inhabited by immortals who are other people but do not let them know that they are being them.

So clearly can't be true that it must be true.

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So clearly can't be true that it must be true.

 

And so serious that it must be a joke but it isnt. But we are clever (some of us) and can get a glimpse now and then.

 

Like when one wakes up in the morning and finds the note that says "Yes, you did wake up in the middle of the night and do your meditation." (Which I started leaving for 'myself' as some mornings I couldnt remember if ' I ' woke up and actually did my midnight meditation or not ).

 

So the question becomes ...either; who is this 'you' ' I ' left the note for that thinks it was asleep all night .... or who was the 'me' that left that note for ' I ' who knows when it is midnight and to wake up and do the meditation?

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And so serious that it must be a joke but it isnt. But we are clever (some of us) and can get a glimpse now and then.

 

Like when one wakes up in the morning and finds the note that says "Yes, you did wake up in the middle of the night and do your meditation." (Which I started leaving for 'myself' as some mornings I couldnt remember if ' I ' woke up and actually did my midnight meditation or not ).

 

So the question becomes ...either; who is this 'you' ' I ' left the note for that thinks it was asleep all night .... or who was the 'me' that left that note for ' I ' who knows when it is midnight and to wake up and do the meditation?

 

 

I left those notes for you.

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But did he , as an immortal, briefly take over my body and write the note or did he physically

 

Man-Sneaking-1473797.jpg

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he does look a bit like the cat ... yeah ?

 

 

In that moment you too were keanu reeves. Crazy but so obviously true.

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I've heard that there's a secret buddhist tantra called "The vajra-words of Keanu are directed to our reeve" (VOKADOR) which is so advanced that the dakinis had to beg the Buddhas for a thousand kalpas to obtain a quarter of it.

 

The dakinis have 108 chapters, but we humans have only 72 chapters.

It was translated into medieval chinese to produce a manual that some unknown guy holds in his house in the island of Java.

 

The Buddha became enlightened after reading the first four chapters and Jesus resurrected from the dead after studying the 9th chapter which later evolved into the Kabbalah.

 

It is said, that Keanu have an english edition of the entire book. :ph34r:

Edited by DAO rain TAO

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I've heard that there's a secret buddhist tantra called "The vajra-words of Keanu are directed to our reeve" (VOKADOR) which is so advanced that the dakinis had to beg the Buddhas for a thousand kalpas to obtain a quarter of it.

 

The dakinis have 108 chapters, but we humans have only 72 chapters.

It was translated into medieval chinese to produce a manual that some unknown guy holds in his house in the island of Java.

 

The Buddha became enlightened after reading the first four chapters and Jesus resurrected from the dead after studying the 9th chapter which later evolved into the Kabbalah.

 

It is said, that Keanu have an english edition of the all book. :ph34r:

VOKADOR has been published.

It's all there on Son of The God's website.

The whole Dakinis shebang. All 108 Chapters, anyone can read it.

Chapter ( Level) 108 ....."Have fun using bilocation." should, allegedly; only be attempted by those in possession of a permission slip signed by More Pie Guy and bearing the official lineage seal of the Space Cadet Panda sangha.

Edited by GrandmasterP
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I warned yous what would happen if you went there ... I warned yous! :angry:

 

RIGHT

 

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with a certain underscore of pride, i was able to withstand your video: in the library without making a single sound, save for those associated with my typing and the general all-around noises of the universe pertaining to my movements thereof.

Edited by Vanir Thunder Dojo Tan

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