oglights

Dissolving meditation not working after 8 years

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On 29/08/2020 at 11:35 AM, oglights said:

I swear I have given it literally all I have, and have tried every little tiny variation in technique I could find.  I read the case of Jane Alexander who managed to cure her severe mental illness from using this method, and my hats off to her, that is amazing.

 

All I could get from this experience is that there is something seriously flawed with me, because I have also gone the rounds of pretty much every healing method available under the sun (including heavy duty doses of psychedelic medicines) and have gotten next to nothing out of it.

 

Good on you for giving it an amazing effort. Did you enjoy any of the time you spent doing it or not? If so it's been good for you, if not well you have probably wasted your time. Here are some thoughts that you may find helpful.

 

What you are looking for is medicine, energetic or whatever. Any medicine works for a time then stops working and it needs to be altered, if you do anything a long time it will just become another habit and add another issue.

 

What is medicine for one person is not necessarily medicine for another. I can treat 10 people with the same injury but all have different treatment methods because they all have different causes. So try something else. Lets face it even with clinical trials for pharmaciticals there is never 100% success, i think if they hit 60% they are doing pretty well. Even physio.


 

 

On 29/08/2020 at 11:35 AM, oglights said:

I must have listened to the audiobook at least 100 times now, practically knowing it by heart by now, as well as much of his other material.

I think you have tried doing it from the book, and with every variation and for quiet a great number of hours. You should be pretty experienced meditator by now, so throw the book and the tape away, you know it off by heart listening/reading it again is only going to bring you back to doing the method in a way that is proven not to work. Ask yourself inside how you can do it in a way that will be more benefitial to you.

 

Something that i think you might find helpful is check in with yourself throught the day. When do you feel worst and when do you feel better? Keep a log and try to work out the things that help and what make you worse. Then it becomes easy and spend more time doing the things that help, thats getting the fruit of meditaiton without meditating, plus you are living not sitting with your eyes closed or whatever.

 

In all honesty if you spend at least 80% of your time purposely doing these things that make you feel better, then leave the other 20% to chance. You eat good food, get good sleep and exercise i think your problems may dissapear.

 

Then if you really want to meditate, when you meditate bring the thoughts and feelings from those good activities into your meditation. Were you gentle? did you do something slow, what is it about these good activities that make you feel better? Bring them into your mediations.

 

 

 

On 29/08/2020 at 11:35 AM, oglights said:

There was recently a private broadcast where BKF said something akin to “stay away from mentally ill people, they are not worth your time” which I just tried to ignore (I have severe depression, anxiety, etc.) but it really severed my connection to this lineage and method, but for whatever reason I am still persevering and putting in the daily practice… perhaps I should give up?

 

To me this is a red flag that this is not the method for you. If BKF said himself that mentally ill people are not worth your time, then what that says to me is he is wasting his time with them because he can't help them. Find something else specifically marketed to mentally ill.

 

On 29/08/2020 at 11:35 AM, oglights said:

Honestly, I have not come across a seemingly better method (at least on paper) than the water method, and I am unbelievably disappointed that I am not getting anything out of it.

 

What is on paper is mostly all sales. What you experience is the truth. So what is on paper is just to entice you to try it, then give it a try. If it doesn't work try something else. I have clients who have tried like 5-6 doctors, specialists, accupuncture, massage, chiro, osteo, etc and then they find help with what i do. I don't claim to be so great, it's just that different things work well for different people. Often clients get fustrated that each professional they seek help from says the problem is due to something else. They are just saying that based on their training and it is true for them. But instead of being fustrated they should be happy that there is a new point of view on the problem, a new opportunity for improvement.

 

There are alot of paradoxes in all of this too though. I spent extensive time doing healing tao like you mayve 3-8hrs a day for 3 years plus most days for another 7 and felt like i was getting so much out of it but did bugger all for original problem i began practicing for. Then did anapana portion of vipassana intensely for a few weeks/days here and there and got massive benefit for my problem, but found it difficult to practice. Healing tao is like sitting down to get high, anapana / vipassana is like sitting down to watch the breath which in comparison is boring as hell.

 

And sorry to just put another spin on it, sometimes there are problems we can just get used to living with. Getting older is no fun and shit happens. I remember seeing Richard Bandler talking about going into mental homes and enableing people to leave simply by having fun with their hallusinations and not taking things so seriously. There are heaps of people living with f**ked up minds, and severely disabled bodies that are doing just fine. Sometimes you can fix something, sometimes the answer is to change your perception and see your problem in a less serious light, or look at the benefits of having your particular problem which can carry you over until the solution for your problem comes into your life.

 

Maybe the solution has come into your life already but you didn't give it a go because you were so sure that this  water method should work. It may have blocked you. Be open to trying lots of different things, sometimes things you don't think will work do work.

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