knowing what love is

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I don't claim to fully "know what love is," and it was the realization that I don't that made me want to post this.


I do feel though that I have had a fairly accurate idea of love throughout my life, and although I've failed many times in this respect, I have tried to interact with others in ways that were kind and respectful toward them.


What I want to say is, people seem to have varying degrees of clarity about the nature of love. I don't mean in a philisophical way, but as a matter of relating to others (and also to oneself) in the kinds of ways that would be regarded as "loving".


An example is my older sister's parenting. My nephew told her once, when he was only about four, that it made him mad when she would tell him to do things. A very mature and healthy expression of emotion imo. She responded, "I'm your mom and you have to do as I say."


I just feel that she could have really blessed him if she had said something like, "Oh thank you for telling me honey, I'll think about that. If you ever get mad, please tell me and we can talk about it. I love you."


You see, it wasn't that she was trying to be a bad mom. But, her reaction didn't seem to me to reflect a very accurate understanding of what love really is.


J. Krishnamurti said, "Can you put your whole being into finding out what love is?"


What is a truly loving way to interact with others?


How would love respond in a certain situation?


We demonstrate our personal answers to these questions every day, as we live our lives.

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knowing what love ISN'T...


love ain't lust

love ain't saying "I love you" with words, but actions differ

love ain't sexual entanglements

love ain't "because of ( beauty/money/security/prestige/etc.)"

love ain't "here today, gone tomorrow"

love ain't "but I love you, so you need to do zyx"

love ain't constant

love ain't towards one person

love ain't exchangeable




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Love is the nature of the Self. It is absolute equanimity towards all things, knowing that they are just projections of one's own Self. There is no good or bad, this or that there.


Love and Joy are the same thing. When this expresses itself through the mind-body, they become what we consider love and joy in the normal, everyday sense. What we experience through any object in our consciousness (mind), e.g. I love my dog or I'm in love with someone, is just the means to taste that which is already within us. Similarly joy - when we listen to a most beautiful piece of music and experience joy, it is just a taste of the joy that is our own nature. When we become truly present, we find that love and joy is already there. And that these are unlimited as the consciousness that we really are.

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