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So I came across this discussion from 2011 in a google search


A bit about me first. I am young and in my mid 20's. About 6 months ago I walked down a path in my road I knew I had to one day, which lead me back to sobriety after a 9 year gap where my life was void of love, in me, around me. I began eating of the earth, exercising, I left myself no crutches, no medication from doctors, no therapy, i put myself in a corner where I was trapped naked and without any cigarettes or cans of beer or cocaine to distract me from facing myself. I got through it alone. Everyone with addictions whether to substances or just only believing in or carrying with them a negative environment by habit, has to in a sense and to a large degree go through it alone and face themself and say hey, this is where I'm at, and Im done. Leaning on others for support got me nowhere. I will say that I might not have gotten so far without my partner's kind words always telling me I didnt have to live how i was living.


I was weak though and My personality was built paper-thin with the idea in my head that i could always turn to someone for support. I had to realize that i could turn to me, and for that to happen I had to isolate myself from every single person i knew. I disabled my facebook and shut off my phone. I have been SO HAPPY.


I lost my dear friend and partner over my alcoholism, hatred from "friends" bringing me down, I dealt also with self hatred, self pity. A conglomeration of negative things seperated us, I have since left negativity in the past. I take all bad things i remember, and I see the good they brought, the things I learned. Such valuable knowledge. I wouldnt change anything.


I'm getting back to digital and physical arts. I love the arts. Filming, painting, drawing, sculpting, stop motion animation, folding origami, doing home projects, creating with my hands. I keep a dream journal, I used to practice lucid dreaming when I was 17, I'm coming back to that as well. I have returned to the few good friends i left behind. I thoroughly enjoy my time alone and am looking to spend it in the way of fulfilling my passion. Which in general is a thirst for more. For culture. For grasping the world. I have been reading books. I love to read read read.


Before I type 3 pages i'll move on. I actually did type 3 pages, going in depth. But for sake of introduction I'll omit them today.


I spoke with a friend's father 5 years ago about practice of QiGong. It stuck with me ever since. Last week I decided to begin learning about it. I want to practice it.


 I have my own history with meditation but it is a scattered one. I am searching for pointers on the following

  • Grounding myself to help with indecisiveness
  • Good literature & guidance (ASAP) on Sexual transmutation (as of now ive just been building up my Qi and after a few days I begin getting so crazy inside, so horny, its unbelievable. I have to know a better way to direct it than just flushing it away. I want to keep it. I want not to tap into my Jing reserve. I must retain it, and circulate it. What do I DO? I am on the brink of letting my creative genius flow full force, however I've been misdirecting myself)
  • Literature or some solid, core guidance to supplement myself going into my new practice, QiGong.

The link i shared in the beginning of post, a person by name of "Fizix" here posted a reply it is the second reply, and the link will bring you straight to his spot on the page.. in his reply he shares a link to a 3 hour long lecture on sexual transmutation. Wish that link wasn't broken now, will be seeking out this lecture. if anyone knows of this lecture or others please share.


From the single thread I read I can tell the people here, are here to discuss things and give their insights seriously, and i didnt see anyone being flamed like some communities I've visited. That's what made me actually register an account here. Ill be skimming threads. You'll see me around.

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Hello, misterziegler, and welcome to the forums,

Your membership is approved and we're happy you found your way to us. We look forward to accompanying you on some of the way that you still have to go.

Please take the time to read the two posts pinned at the top of this Welcome page and take a look at the forum terms and rules. This covers all you need to know when getting started.

For the first week you will be restricted to ten posts per day but after that you can post as much as you like. Also, until you’ve posted fifteen times in the forums, you’ll be a “Junior Bum” with somewhat restricted access and will be allowed only two private messages per day.

Good luck in your pursuits and best wishes to you,

Marblehead and the TDB team

Hi misterziegler,

Quite a life you have had so far and being so young.  Nice hearing that you feel you are getting your life together so that you can be all that you can be.

Not too many people read the Welcome threads so my first suggestion is that you find a place you think best for posting the more important, in your mind, parts of your intro post.

There are many here who I think will be ready and willing to talk with you concerning the things you have mentioned.

May you enjoy your time here.


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Thanks for that, OldChi. I made an order of this paperback. I do appreciate a point in the direction of a place to just begin. So very ready to approach this. It's been a long time I've seen this place I have been walking toward. And I'm finally here.

Edited by misterziegler
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