stirling

Your reaction is the common, and culturally appropriate one. Of course you don't like it - no-one does... that is the nature of samsara. There is always something about reality that is at odds with our expectations, but I think it is worth asking yourself: "When was the last time you were able to travel in time and change something?" The things we are generally upset about have ALREADY happened and cannot be changed. Accepting this is accepting reality as it is. "What is really happening right in this moment, in a 10 foot, 10 second radius?" Generally this is what you can comfortably, verifiably call "reality". This is also the bubble in which you can take an available action. What are the available actions that might stop suffering in this space? "Are the things I don't want to accept happening here in this 10 X 10 space? Have they already happened? Are they happening somewhere else? Is not accepting them as reality truly LIVING in reality?" Notice that I am not saying that accepting is LIKING, it is simply choosing not to be in clinging or aversion to a fictional version of reality that you hope will come to pass or fear will happen, or a memory of the past you wish things were like, or are afraid will be real again. If something is happening and you are driven to stop it ACT. If you can calm what seems like an impending fight, or right a letter to your congressman, or march with like minded people in this moment, then PLEASE do so. Definitely have compassion for suffering in AND outside of your 10 X 10 circle, and send thought sof loving kindness (or do Buddhist practices like Tonglen or Metta if you are inclined).

Please know that the dharmkaya, the body and emanation of ALL dharma and the outpouring of the entire phenomenal universe, accepts "you" just as you are, and always has, with complete and unconditional love. You are absolutely just as you should be. Further, please know that the universe, as it is in this moment, CANNOT exist without you JUST AS YOU ARE. It is LITERALLY impossible for things to be otherwise. Self-acceptance is a first step, agreed. Karma creates difficult situations for you to deal with, but ALL of them are an opportunity for you to realize where you can surrender to this moment and accept IT as it is, with all of its perceived flaws. Respectfully - much love to you and yours, and the best of luck in finding your sangha. If you have trouble finding one, please feel free to join mine.

One of my teachers, the late Jana Drakka, was most definitely lesbian and very actively a part of that community, but also (quietly) transgender and never had issues in her time at San Francisco Zen center, where she was a monk, and eventually a transmitted teacher. As you would imagine, there are MANY from the LGBTQ community at SFZC, as well as many from most any other measure of diversity you could fathom. At another abbey where I spent much of my time, the Tenso (in charge of meals) was transgender, and would happily tell you that there was never a comment made. My experience with Soto Zen in California is that is has been mostly blind to such things. People are there to become enlightened, not judge others.

Lojong and Chod are deeply powerful practices, but it really is worth meeting someone who knows them can work on them with you. I can deeply recommend Norman Fischer's very relatable "Training in Compassion" for beginners interested in the Lojong part. Tonglen alone, or (in my experience) in concert with Metta practice, are great for developing relative bodhicitta and transforming self-cherishing.

It would be complicated to answer the question as asked. How about: In this moment there is Rigpa. There is no "I" that contains it.

They are repeatable, but are they the SAME every time? Is any moment ever the same as another?

Right? It's is simply a shift in perspective, not the seeing of something that wasn't always there. It doesn't actually even require effort, but instead the ceasing of effort.

Once the river is crossed the dharma isn't needed, and doesn't really even make sense from the perspective of the absolute. It is a relative teaching, ultimately, a raft intended to get the student across the river.

It is unlikely that it will ever appear as an "experience" in the same way, however the underlying quality of emptiness (if there is insight) will show up when the mind is quiet and empty. Experiences are never the same, but the underlying quality is always the same. Phenomena are constantly arising and passing in a constant outpouring, but they are always "empty" of anything that has any intrinsic (belonging to itself) existence. The existence of any thing existing as a separate entity is illusory, but the label-less phenomena arise naturally and constantly, just as the emptiness does.

Have you seen it since? Do you think you would recognize it again if you saw it?

You didn't ask me obviously, but I just want to add that the IDEA of emptiness/ripga/nature of mind is not emptiness/rigpa/nature of mind. Grasping at ANYTHING, including a reified "emptiness" is not it. Once seen and understood, and once "self" is finally seen through, you can't really get lost in anything (void included). So, as you suggest, it is a relative/conventional idea to be careful of falling into the trap of reifying "emptiness" as a concept or influence on behavior. Imagine you weren't aware of temperature as a quality of reality. People would say that they were cold or hot, and you would have no idea what they meant and think they were crazy. Then, one day, the quality of temperature becomes known to you as something that seems to underly all of your experiences. You could now incline your mind toward your sense of temperature and be aware of it at any time it occurs to you. Eventually, perhaps, you could even ALWAYS be present with this quality. Silence (as a "quality of emptiness") is always present. Emptiness/rigpa/nature of mind is always present. There is always this quiet empty stillness, even when walking, or on a busy street corner, or as a thought arises and passes. It is the one pervasive constant of reality. In relative terms the silence is an underlying quality to ALL arising and passing of phenomena. You can taste this stillness in meditation, in the quiet moments in between thoughts. In those moments there is resting in enlightened mind, and how things are seen is not different than enlightened mind, though NOT enlightenment itself, which is insight.

You can believe in both at the same time, however both are just thoughts happening now. Beliefs don't have any reality of their own. Where are either of those ideas in the quiet empty stillness in between thoughts? Skill is the same illusion as volition. Even intention only arises in this moment. Where are skill or perspective in the quiet empty stillness in between thoughts? Who is there to have any of these qualities there? Self is just another idea happening now, when the idea passes, so does self.

As long as we are seeing from the relative view, Karma will always catch and snag us where we have clinging and aversion. The "path" (if such a thing ever existed) is as simple as seeing what the dharmakaya, from which all arising phenomena and their interaction borne situations arise, shows us about WHERE we are snagged and where our concretions of ideas are. What arises is always pointing back to the empty NON-arising quality of things as they truly are. Karma exists and happens until it is experientially understood and the completely pervasive that there is no-one to have or, literally, embody Karma.

Those that seek or want enlightenment tend to have an inkling that there is something present that underlies what they think of as conventional reality, and want to know what it is. This commonly happens after having a spiritual experience or "supernatural" event of some kind. Seeking also happens when someone is just tired of the struggle of human life, tired of torturing themselves with stories from their past, or projected ideas about the future that always fail to come to pass as they had hoped. How does it happen? As thelerner capably suggests, there is momentary insight into things as they truly are. In that moment what you think of as your "self" disappears, and it is seen that the world of "self", things, others - of space/time even, are all conceptual constructs that have never truly been real in the absolute sense. This essentially breaks your belief in the world as you had previously contrived it. While this insight gradually fades shortly after it starts, as the "experience" of this seeing goes away, the insight is permanent. Over time it becomes increasingly obvious experientially that what you saw in that experience is, and has always been, present, eventually dissolving the seeing of things from a fictional "self" and ,later still, making it impossible to see anything as other than the grand emptiness/fullness of the Tao/Dharmakaya. If you don't struggle with your life, or find the events or objects in it and their lack of permanence unsatisfactory, there really is no need to try to alter how you see them. If you are satisfied, why would you bother? I would guess that your presence here suggests that this is not the case, though?

Thank you for the welcome, Mr. thelerner, and for your solid boilerplate ethics. I approve! Looking forward to contributing, while boring and confounding in equal measure!

Hello friends, I spent 25 years in Dzogchen, starting the ngondro in the early 2000's, and in the process my teacher passed on. A few years later, after a bottomless insight into non duality, I sought out the nearest dharma teacher, which was the start of my time in the Soto Zen tradition (which, as it turns out, is quite compatible with my previous experience in Dzogchen). 5 years since that insight, my everyday life happens without the handicap of a "self". Today I run a university meditation program, and have a small sangha. I am unaccountably sewing my robes for ordination. I really enjoy discussion on the topic of things as they truly are in a completely non-disciplinary sense, and treasure teenage experiences with Syd Barrett and Stephen Mitchell. Taoism looms as a early precursor to future experiences, inasmuch any of these things truly exists. I am interesting in finding pointers for deeper reading in Taoism, information on it's siddhi/magick aspects, and like-minded/experienced people here, and in the Western Washington area.