Owledge

Weird: Dream revolving around image from open eye(s)

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I think I might occasionally dream but are able to open my eyes, and am wondering whether someone knows what could be going on. Sometimes when I 'crash' on the sofa because I feel tired (e.g. from a meal, although strangely not right after eating but towards the end of the digestive phase) and take a nap, what would happen is that I go into a recurring dream theme of having difficulty opening my eyes. This time that I still remember well, I was only able to occasionally half-open my left eye, with a lot of effort. And I was seeing exactly what I would see when opening that eye awake, lying there on the sofa, part of my arm in the view etc..

And then apparently the typical dream consciousness that likes to pick up impressions subconsciously and work with them couldn't not deal with that strong impression and the dream started revolving around that. Several times I got up in the dream and tried opening my other eye, or sometimes just doing stuff like browsing a catalogue or a video, as if to train my mind to awake to open the eyes by busying it with awake-like stuff. I would use my fingers and try to pull open my eyelid(s), but that didn't succeed. They were just wanting so strongly to stay closed, just like when extremely tired. In another moment I would move my hand(s) in front of that open eye vista and realize that nothing changes about it, that I cannot see my moving hand in front of me, as if the image was burnt in. (But when closing the eye things went black. Then I would actually dream of just having my eyes closed.) Then I would desperately keep seeking and eventually see my own face with eyes within that image, pretty much like that faint reflection of your own eye you have in your glasses if you focus on it, and then I noticed how when moving my hands my eyes (both open) in that reflection would follow the hand, and occasionally the speed of that would increase. So that was definitely the dream component. That reflection then assumed a wider view and I saw a villainous person figure looming over me from behind, not moving (fictional character, likely just symbolic for something) and I did defensive movements with my hands as if to ward him off or beat him up, and that in that moment felt distinctively as if I was out of the dream already, trying to do some 'dream aftercare' just in case. But that was still while asleep. I then woke up and felt very depleted, as usual after I take a sofa nap instead of a proper sleep in my bed.

 

Now, I don't want to go all 'evil spirits' with this, but I think it could still all be an expression of my subconscious that my mind disagrees with being in the sleep state at that time and would much rather be awake. (I am in a prolonged situation where I have a desire to be more active but have trouble finding a path to that.)

I find this quite severe. And I'm not sure whether it fits the diagnosis of sleep paralysis or is more like a partial version of the opposite, since I can move an eyelid while fully asleep. (Wikipedia: "Sleep paralysis is when, during awakening or falling asleep, one is aware but unable to move.") Although many descriptions there match.

Edited by Owledge

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