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Everything posted by Goldleaf

  1. I found another post by a daobum on yawning and sighing here, but I am also trying to examine it from an environmental /western perspective. For me, when I enter some buildings, I find myself yawning repeatedly and easily. Even if I have just woken up, and had a good nights sleep, feel fresh and energetic, and then, after 5mins in said building, I feel drowsy and yawning. I know that I have big kidney yin-deficiency. So perhaps this won't be an issue for most. But who knows, maybe it allow me to be even more perceptive to the subtle difference in indoor environments. (I also did the microcosmic orbit for several years). I never, ever, ever yawn when I am outside. (Unless, really late at night and I have worked all day, etc.). So, I wonder if there is something to be said for improving indoor environment. What could it be?? Is it the air conditioning? Carpet? Is there mold?> What are the most common problems to be aware of in indoor environ,ment?? Should I walk around alll day with a serious air-filter mask on my face?? Most importantly, how can I make my indoor environment at home, as healthy as possible?? I don't expect all these quesitons to be answered but hope to generate discussion and get a bit more clarity on this important modern issue.
  2. what does a yawn mean (yin-deficiency)

    I swore I wouldn't go down the rabbit hole of household air (the less I have to worry about, the better), but I want to understand this, so I will do what it takes. While I was reading your wonderful post I thought of my housemates. They uuse fabric softener a lot, and also, dye their hair and use various chemicals for hair and skin, and sometimes I can smell it through the ducted air ducts. INterestingly, I tried sealing up both of the ducts the other day. At first, it felt better, but then, I felt like was choking in the back of my throat, and had tonne of mucus once I left the room. So I unsealed them, and felt much better. This makes me think it may be the carpet as you mentioned. So how can you properly clean a toxic carpet?? Besides just air purifiers, What about: vacuums with hepa filters covering the carpet near the bed with a thick rug raising the bed (temporary solution) using a gas mask during sleep I will try each of these and report results/. Hopefully help other sleep / indoor sufferers. Also, does any Daobum know by any chance of some cheap ways of detecting invisimble mould and mildew in a house?? GL
  3. Not overthinking or worry is a key to good Qi Gong and health, too. You want to get to a state where do you don't have to worry excessively about such things. :)) Sex between two healthy people who love each other will be harmonious, and the energy loss will be minimal. So you don't have to worry about semen creation, kidney Qi leakage, or can be just spontaneous and allow things to flow. You have a curious mind that wants to understand and that is awesome and will get you far :)0 But, the mind can only take you so far, whereas the heart can take you anywhere and everywhere... :))
  4. I won't mention the site I got this from. I don't know why, but honestly, it makes me feel sick in my stomach at the prospect of dating again, especially as I now older and more of a provider type. Here it is. "Evolutionary psychologists agree that women are actually looking for two mates, not one; a provider, and a genetic resource. They will hook up with providers and then have steaming sex with alphas behind the betas’ backs. The best deal is of course an alpha who is also a provider, but those things kinda cancel each other out because an alpha stops being an alpha when he supplicates. Women actually do this quite often; they just don’t get caught for it as often as men do because they don’t brag about it. They also don’t have a need to tell their partners because while men make an emotional investment in their woman, women reserve their emotional investment for their children. If you study the statistics, you will notice that while men frequently commit suicide when their long-term relationship ends, women almost never do. Anybody ever wonder why? Another study showed that the truth is actually likely to never come out; they did paternity tests to thousands of couples and their children, and it was revealed that a staggering number of the children weren’t actually genetically related to their father at all. I wish I still had that paper somewhere…" I mean, my jaw drops when I realise this is true. So, a man has to not only be a provider in a relationship, but also work hard, maintain the romance....and meanwhile the woman lose respect for him and cheat behind his back...while eating the food he puts on the table and driving his car he bought for her!!! I mean, I truly do not want to start a gender war, but I also don't want to become a mysogyonist who sees women only as sex objects who would otherwise exploit and backstab :(( I am posting here, because I have read some wonderful posts from some of the ladies here, and I am particularly interested to hear that they honestly do not believe this themselves. Cheers Gl
  5. Thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts,m good to know i'm not alone on these thoughts and nice to hear opposing viewpoints too. Yup, I am scared of getting burned again, I have been in three meaningful relationships and actually never had the woman cheat on me (as far as I know lol) in any of them, nor get bored, but even so, this paragraph really put my head into a spin. But anyway, no point worryign about things that can't change...just focus the good 1% of women that are hopefully out there... Maybe I will use the Secret to find them lol.
  6. Please Help - Sexual Exhaustion

    Sorry to necro, But wanted to add a few things and Pietro, I have a question for you based on the above site - what do you suggest for those that feel great fear at the prospect of making eye contact with a woman, while working towards her? I'm guessing its a confidence / gallbladder energy/ weak spleen issue. I am guessing I need to work on my confidence a bit first. To the OP hcp and others, Not sure if it was mentioned here, and since you are now 10 years old I'm assuming you've met someone. But, the key with this and with many things in life is that they are counter-intuitive. You are in a rush to meet a girl since you believe that is the most important thing. But in fact that is the LEAST important thing. It is just a by-product of making yourself healthy, confident, not sexually desperate, and developing skills at talking to, and feeling comfortable with, women. You want to rush to make it happen because you want to make up for lost time. I get that too because I have similar issues. But again, it is counter intuitive. You need to develop the skills first. Once you have the skills, you can get ANY woman!!! Imagine you have all the time you need to learn these skills. Savour the process of learning. It is like the first movie of any superhero movie - how the hero gets their powers and learns to use them...this is always the best movie in the series to watch!!
  7. good sleep journal

    Thanks ilumairen Will buy some eye drops shortly, too.
  8. good sleep journal

    Hi there, Am I mistaken or did there used to be sub-forum for daily practice? Rather than post occassional threads about my sleep issues, I am keen to make a regular entries, like daily practice, both for posterity and for the hope that other enlightened daobums might pick up something in what I have written, that I haven't! Cheers GL
  9. Buddha was referring to the external world as illusion to inspire those interested to seek the reality within them.
  10. good sleep journal

    Usually 1-2 hours per night. Lighting is on the ceiling behind and above me, I am lying down. I am using it this way now, and my eyes are bloodshot andsore, even though I had a great day which felt both tiring and invigorating. It feels like I am being attacked by an irritant in the room, since, I have used this computer in other areas and never feel this way.
  11. Perhaps its when you feel most lost that you will realy find what you are after. You sound pretty self-aware. I know you don't want info overload, but maybe a book like Cosmic Ordering or The Secret could help you find the answer to what you are after, since you seem to know how to ask the question. Good luck!
  12. good sleep journal

    Thanks mate! Just want to quickly share an important breakthrough. I managed to go beyond my mind for a brief period during chi kung yesterday, and had a powerful chi flow!! I felt warm and energetic and engaging, i.e, it opened my heart. Then, when I came home after long day, I immediately noticed some irritation on my eyes and nose. I used the computer in the room, and felt a not-nice liquidy feeling in my kidneys, which I wouldn't normally get from PC use. So, at least I am getting somewhere to figure this out. So here's the strange thing, when i first moved here, for the first month, I slept amazing. Had no eye or nose irritation. Felt energetic and even had girls flirting with me openly! So, what has changed?? I vacuum, clean sheets regularly, etc. That is some serious irritation. When I woke up this morning my eyes were totally bloodshot. So my next question is, are there any enlightened daobums out there, with second sight, who can help me identify the source of this irritation? Please pm me if you think you can have a go. I'll even pay you if it works. (and I honor my agreeements I am a gentleman). In the meantime, if you are suffering an issue like me, try doing your chi kung in the morning, have a nice chi flow, and then at least you can still have an enjoyable and productive day, and the chi kung will in the long term will improve your sensitivity and overall health. Thanks gl
  13. What do you sleep on?

    Reminds me of Karl Pilkington, in my eyes one of the funniest man alive
  14. Emergency situation, seeking advice (content may be triggering)

    You could also try Shaolin Chi Kung and Kung Fu. It is taught by Grandmaster Wong Kiew Kit. I did a couple of courses there, after I had abused Marijuana, ecstacy in the past, had some strong, cleansing chi flows, and although it wasn't a magic bullet (nothing is), it helped me appreciate it the simple beauty of life without drugs, and have a clear-thinking, positive mind. (I even managed to still my mind!). Courses are expensive, I paid about 1500$ Australian but you can get a full refund if you don't experience benefits. (N.b I do not work for or receive any monetary benefit for promoting, just sharing what I thought might help you the most). I've met a guy who also had a heavy pot-smoking past, now he enters into free-sparring tournaments using only his Tai Ji and wins them!! Good luck on your journey. And remember, it is you that controls your brain, not the weed lololol
  15. Freedom or Bulls***

    Freedom to choose. This is the advantage Neo had over Agent Smith in the final Matrix film. Smith had only purpose (to take over and multiply himself), whereas Neo had choice. If you don't choose the solution, you're part of the problem.
  16. Wonderful post, thanks for everything :0
  17. Hi there daobums, I once again moved house, and at first was sleeping amaazing. Amazing, saw beauty in everything, felt relaxed and open and talkative. I remember thinking, as I laid on the bed "this is so comfortable, there is no shaking in my body compared to previous beds, ahhhh". And I was sleeping so well I felt potent!! (As opposed to im-potent lol). Girls were showing interest in me and I was showing more interest in them. I was having long dreams that I remember almost all parts of them and were really refreshing. Anyway, I don't know what happened, but after two-three weeks, I had some not-nice sleeps here. I woke with bloodshot eyes. Lately I have even been waking feeling anxious and fearful and doubtful of myself. Yet I do not have bad habits, do hard drugs, and I eat well and do chi kung regularly. So here is the thing that I don't understand. How can my sleep go from 10/10 amazing, to 2/10 feeling insecure, unrested and fearful, in the space of such a short time? The only other clues I have are that like I mentioned my eyes have felt bloodshot at times. I use my laptop lying in bed sometimes, maybe I will stop doing that for now and see what happens, do a bit of minimalism. See, even while typing this I feel a liquidy feeling in my kidneys, which I did not feel when I was sleeping amazing. Here is another weird clue. I laid on the bed yesterday arvo to have a short nap, in a different way to before, and even though I didn't nap, I felt absolutely amazing, after just lying there for a few minutes. I got up and had a warm engaging chat with my housemate, that turned into a 10minute chat! Perhaps there are certain sweet spots in the bed who knows, but even if there were, it must have been pretty lucky that I hit those sweet spots for the first two entire weeks that I slept there?? *** I will update and edit this post for posterity. **** (Edit 14/1) - Just realised, could it all be because the bed has wooden slats??, and there are gaps. So I wonder, when I lay in a way which might cause a blockage in my pressure points where I lie, such as the hips and shoulders...could this cause a blockage / contribute to more difficulties? Is sore eyes related to any acupuncture channels in the arm / shoulder?? Cheers Goldleaf
  18. Hi daobums, Again I implore your help. I was sleeping well, but then something happened in the room, I started getting severe reactions - dry, bloodshot eyes, nightmares, wet dreams, even though in the rest of my daily life I try to live it with my health in mind. So I took the mattress out and didn't get those reactions. Unfortunately, without the mattress I sleep even worse since I am unsupported. I am beginnning to feel hopeless. How can I figure out what it is I am reacting to, and then, how can I deal with it? (Do I need to wear industrial gas masks while sleeping lol). I am sick of watching my life go by while I struggle with unrestful sleep every day, walking around like a zombie. I have tried many things: visit doctor, blood test, using air-cleaning pot plants, etc. I feel I am simply running out of things to try, and/or don't have the resources to try them. Why do we not have the friggin technology in almost the year 2020 to allow our fellow man to sleep well? On average 3.5 million people a year die as a direct result of indoor air pollution, according to the WHO. We should feel refreshed after spending time indoors, not fuken cancerous and sick. I swear I would make a business creating healthy, proper, inexpensive breathing masks for people to live and sleep, its a joke that we don';t have clean air and it makes me angry. If anyone is interested in helping me with getting this business started, I will drive it all the way, I will help heal our fellow man I just need your backing. Air quality indoor and outdoor is only getting worse in the future. Every human being should have access to clean air, clean water, and clean food. No compromise. Its time for a change. Regards GL
  19. Rideforever, thanks but to be honest, since doing all the blood tests, sleep study, allergy test, visit naturopath... I have come to believe the major issue is environmental. That doesn't mean I want to dismiss internal aspects. If I was healthier, doing yoga, could stop overthinking at will, was getting the reported benefits from my daily chi kung, and not as sensitive to chemicals as I probably am...then I have no doubt this would help. But the fact that I have had amazing sleeps just after moving to a new house and new mattress (literally amazing, I had girls stare at me as they walked past), what else can I believe but it is the environment? Maybe I just need to air my mattress every two or three days. I will try that and update. gl
  20. Everything, that is the funniest thing I have ever read. I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt. Thanks
  21. Thanks kind daobums. \Can't open a window, it drops to freezing temps at night. I've seen a doctor, done a sleep study, I don't have sleep apnea. Done blood tests, I don't have any diseases or allergies as far I know. Slept a little better last night, don't feel as frantic. I had dreams. If I could just understand, why some times I have good sleep and sometimes horrid (like when I wrote my first post), I could have some control over it. I even lost my job thanks to unreliable sleep lol. And how the f*ck does it change so easily, its so volatile. Anyway, perhaps a part of me secretely hoped that someone here would have some near-psychic insight into my problems and/or have some relevant experience with it, and I apologise to all you Dao Bums for approaching it this way. I have at least made progress since a decade ago when this first happened, and I am determined to keep posting any new insights I have for posterity. gl
  22. Yes it could be, but honestly, after sleeping so amazingly well in this current place I thought I had made it. Even with my doubts at first about sleep I still slept well. I don't mean to bother this forum. I am just really tired and appreciate a bit of extra help. I am so tired I cannot relax lol.
  23. Good point, the mind is powerful. But the thing is, I wasn't thinking about it much before the bad sleeps begun happening. It just crept in.
  24. Hi everyone, I previously posted how I bought a latex layer for my mattress and that solved my not-nice sleep problem..until I moved house. But at least my sleep now is nowhere near to how bad it was before. No bloody nose or painful diarrhea. In this new house, I have struggled to have a good sleep. I feel scared instead of confident, feel like hiding instead of taking on challenges. The difference between sleeps is so vast!! I don't expect that anyone will know how to help me with this, especially given all I have tried and learnt. But I hope at least you guys can help me gain some clarity about what to try / not try. My gut instinct is that its an intolerance or allergy of some kind to the new room. Once I leave the house for the day, I clear my nose a few times and feel like my throat is clogged with phlegm. The room itself doesn't have a smell, but then again I should be able to smell something in the room shouldn't I?? I vacuum and clean my sheets regularly. The great advice you guys gave me before about not taking things too seriously has helped: i'm now doing volunteering twice a week and a yoga class and it feels great. the days I do yoga I feel a bit more "nicely exhausted" and it might help me fall asleep quicker , but sleep quality is the issue. I also went to a sleep study and had electrodes and I don't have sleep apnea. My only other concern is that maybe these years of poor sleep, and past years of drugs and sex, plus overthinking and negative attitudes, have eroded my health so much that even a friggin molecule of dust might cause my body concern. I sincerely hope not. My acupuncturist says I am yin-deficient but he never says to what extent, but I know one thing: whenever I do acupuncture I feel deeply exhausted. (And no have sex drive to speak of even though relatively young). So the deep concern I have is that how can I restore my yin to strengthen my Wei Qi if I have trouble sleeping well in the first place. I welcome all thoughts, however small. I will compile these ideas plus the ideas from my last desperate thread on sleep and then distil them into another post and lets help many people who have or will have sleep problems.