Everything

Thanks for sharing that, looks like a great documentary I'm going to watch I also find it very interesting how sometimes people from the history books know more then we do today.

Just reread your earlier posts here, they're great. I'm not quite sure what you ment with following desires at first, but with this post I think I do now. I totally agree that identity comes from quiting the rat race of passiveness. Especially for a kid. Sitting passive and doing nothing will eventually lead to regression and becoming a child. So people say "Its better to make the wrong decision and learn from it then not to decide at all!" This is how you learn to deal with anger and fear. When people choose the passive journey, they become depressed. Alot of anger gets stored up, they do nothing with this energy, it becomes sadness, it becomes depression. You decide to become happy and seek excitement, face your fears, do courage and feel confident. Care for your desires and be assertive when angry to get what you want. That is what I ment with motivation. Being motivated by anger and fear in order to reach goals. When you're afraid, you do courage. When you're angry with work, you get some relax time and have fun with buddies. Motivation... What you ment thought was not follow destructive desires, only positive desires. Only life enhancing desires, right? What if you take care of the things that make you feel angry/ fearful in the first place? What do you need confidence for if you no longer become afraid. What do you need well-being for if you no longer become angry? That is what I mean with focus. With such a great focus people can withstand alot of pain and fear and become unsensitive to it. Like a samurai, who fights only out of commitment to higher order, not out of anger or fear. Without emotions. Tranquil like trees and grass, without desires. That sounds like an honorable way to go. If a murderer spits in your face while you were to execute him and you become angry, you have failed. Seath your sword and return home, for we do not kill out of anger. Do not kill animals out of hunger, but out of commitment for killing them the best way we can, fast and smooth with least pain possible. Commitment to something bigger then one self. Focus... Is there really one without the other or do we need both motivation and focus? In the context of what I mentioned.

Hehehe, on my iPhone I cannot retrace my posts, weird interface on this site. Now that I'm on my computer I can finally reply again. Sorry for taking so long. Man the words really get messy here... You're right, caring and confidence is great for sharing love, ofcourse it has to be returned aswell. Like you give her confidence she gives you care. Finding a mate, however, is not about succes or intellectual accomplishments woulden't you agree? It is not a "goal." A goal is just a small part in the relationship. The relationship consists of passion, friendship and partnership(goals). Infact, with girls you spark first and formost with a physical attraction, you are mysterious to here because you know that you can do kung fu and your body language shows it, you accept her challenges and deal with it, you delve right in. Without this spark there is no passion. Also the girl has something beautiful about here, she challenges you and cheers for you, then I feel attracted. Thats my experience. Without those I just know passion will not last. It does not begin with friendship usually. Seeking a mate you just walk to a women not because you like her, but because you feel attracted to her, and she does not run away because she is attracted to you. Secondly, the thing you talked about is friendship. You share your confidence and care with here and she gives it back, the emotional energies are spinning around and you feel alive around eachother. You become happy with eachother besides sticking around like magnets. Last, but not least, you form a team, a partner and commit to eachother. You might get married and set clear boundaries but agree that you will return to love at the end of the day. This cannot be done if you're not intellectual complementary. Its like: she keeps the house clean, you mess it all up. Or you earn money, she spends it all away. Thats real teamwork So what I ment with goals is the partnership part of the relationships with either yourself or others. Basicly, your efficiency with time. You either focus on certain things or are flexible. That is how you get things done. For example, your girlfriend might be focused, and you provide for the flexibiliy in your journey together towards a goal. Like going on vacation. But the vacation itself consists of attraction, friendship and partnership for the whole package. I think you should definitely distinguish those while dating. It'd be really messy if you'd say like: "OK DARLING LISTEN UP! We're going to get happy today and we're going to do it good! You focus on getting candles, I try creating a love song for you that I will drink over champane... Ok you don't agree with this date? WHERE ARE YOUR ARGUMENTS GODDAMNIT!!!" Lol that should go right into a romance comedy film

I'm a person who has succeeded in doing great things. That is what I think when I look back in the past. I do not see my struggles, because I do not remember them. It is very strange how the mind works... How focus and awareness works. How they are dependant on sub-conscous and how they change our memories. Truth is: I have failed more then succeeded... Or is it? (I'll answer that one later) When we sub-consciously believe in something, we(as in our consciousness) do not require any focus in order to make it happen. Our mind naturally, instinctively, impulsively focuses on it. When we do something wrong our mind will even then correct our behaviour very efficiently and wisely without our consciousness ever noticing that we altered our own behaviour or that we were even struggling in the first place! You even have to analyze your own behaviour to notice why you have improved in a certain task or behaviour... You really have to sit at the edge of your focus when meditating on a certain task to notice the influence our sub-conscious minds has on us. You might be thinking 'this guy is a lunatic, everyone would simply be using this knowledge to his advantage if it were true!' and appart from me being a lunatic, you're right! Well whats going on then? Two important factors that we must consider: we are highly social creatures and great knowledge requires great wisdom to handle. Whats got social to do with it? What I mean with social is that our believes shoot out energies which are contagious to other people. I'm not willing to go into this with great detail. Lets say that changing believes will destroy your relationship with the people you love. You will burn your fingers on fire of knowledge that you perceive to be a toy. On the other hand, some people lack to see the potential in fire if handled responsibly. This led me to the spiritual journey. I believed that I could possibly continue changing my life for my own benefits in one area and still have all of society back me up. I got attracted to Tao te Ching and paradoxically learned that my lack of wisdom was the cause of society turning its back on me. I was naive to think that society would gladly see me win everything why they did not win. Also, some people might reach this point from another path, by being too shrewd and destroying other peoples lives in order to get ahead while in the end they have no one to share it with. I simply dealt with this by only serving society and all of mankind, all of live on earth and nature. At first, even for a naive person like me, this felt like loosing and letting others win. But it is not... It is winning and giving what you have won to those who have lost so that you can infinitely win over and over again... Believing, you have faith. Trying, you do not yet have faith, but are seeking it. Think about it... So, to return to the question, did I really fail more then I succeeded? Lets say I did. Its a nice step closer towards wisdom. Besides, all the wise people say this! Why would they say it if it weren't true? Right? Well, lets say that it is not exactly true, that they only say that because we are social creatures. Let us say that we actually WANT to hear that we failed more often then succeeded, just as a concept. Why would we want that? Because we believe we did. We see that we failed at our lives so often and we believe it. Wise people notice this, and they say we did fail, they even claim they did fail to! Surely thats not a lie! Well, it is. The believing part, that is the lie your mind made up. The wise people don't believe they have failed. They have the ability to hold this concept in mind without caring and secretly, quitly not care about failing, not believing in it in order not to upset the defense mechanisms of our minds. All they can do is agree that failing exists and show their carelessness in the hope that other people will notice their carelessness towards failing as a subliminal message. What is the message? You already know it. Let me just recall it for you: truth is relative. You don't have to see in order to believe(you don't have to try untill you see a result, which is equal to insanity if you ask me), and you can believe in order to see(have faith that it will be here and you'll see results). Succesful people simply do not even think about failing, they don't hold it in their minds for longer then a few seconds a day at most. They actually feel repelled by the very idea of failing and only use the word when when the social necessity arises to do so. Their friends usually can't hold the concept of failure in mind either. This naturally makes them compatable and puts them at ease around eachother. They don't have friends who think about failing in whatever timeframe. If I believe I can do something, I will more often recall successes from mememory. When I try to do something I will often recall struggles from memory. Answer: I did not fail even once when achieving those great things in the past, because I never had that concept in my mind in the first place. I never got sad when I did not succeed, I only got happy when I succeeded. Most importantly, I never even TRIED to succeed. How to fail if you do not try to succeed? Always be aware when you catch yourself trying to do something. Also remember that the truth is relative. When it os pulled out of its context it doesn't matter. It is what you believe is the truth that matters. Make your life the context and relativity of a truth full of loving kindness and peace so that in this universe nothing can possibly stand in your way, for you will become like the powerful element of water. If you're a beginner, for the love of god don't go yelling out your believes and know the sacrifices you'll have to make before you dedicate to a certain believe. You might hurt a loved one trying to change their believes. Use this light, but shed no light unto others so that you may do yourself no harm. Remember that changing believes is like playing with fire. The more stronger you believe the bigger the fire gets. More passion, but also more burning. Never mistake the fire for being actual wisdom. Remain flexible enough to change believes on the go without to big attachments. Last, but not least, keep your faith during the struggles and the struggles will naturally go away. Practice focusing on your faith on your ability to create the life you want. Or you can simply remain present minded and rule out the factor of the the sub-conscious mind with an increased awareness and expanded conscioisness. That one is more tricky but works wonders too if you don't have lofty aspirations. hf & gl.

If you value or hold precious of an idea it has become an believe. The ideas that you value form your reality. Sometimes the core believes are forgotten, like a subliminal message, and the emotion is always felt. The believe attracts similar concepts related to itself and grows like a magnet attracting small debri. The stronger the emotions during the formation of a believe the stronger it will attract similar believes. For example, I once wrote a piano piece that I really liked. Suddenly I believe that I can write great music, even though I can't in reality. Some people say my music sux, but my focus is on finding evidence that I am good. It is a natural instinct. And everytime I find evidence my survival instinct catches this useless piece of evidence and holds it precious like a magnet. My reality slowly begins to change. I begin listening to classical music. I believe that I totally understand a piece of chopin or beethoven because I think I'm a genius. So its just a matter of time for me to completely get it. You say we should do something instead of believe it. I think that doing is the first step towards believing. If I did not believe that I understood music composition I would never keep listening to beethoven for example. I would say ok this sux, I don't get it, byebye. If i do believe, my only purpose is wait for evidence with patience. That is what having faith means to me. It is the ability to do as little as possible and get out of your own way and believes. But you first have to dedicate to a believe and value it increasingly over time untill it becomes undestructable. This is how humanity makes progress. We believe and it becomes reality. Some people do something and nothing gets done because they don't believe in it in the first place. I'd rather practice non-doing because I believe that even picking a piece of pencil requires faith. We should not fear the disappointment that comes with having a strong faith. It is natural to get dissappointed from time to time. This just means your faith is not strong enough. Your faith is your light and you should not give it away. The problem is not that we should stop having faith, we should have faith in better things. We can't go around giving love to people when you believe that people are rats who form a plague. Just an example. Think about it. Faith is the amount of value you place on certain ideas, for good or for worse. Why should we not value things at all if we just get dissappointed this one time that someone steals our valued idea. Protection is part of life. Your identity becomes more clear and stronger when you can protect and lend this protection to others. Someone has to protect faith. For it too can be stolen. What do you guys think. Living without believing in anything, being completely tranquil, doing the rat race? I don't see the purpose of it. I just think that becoming tranquil we reset our reality, empty our cups and become newborn. Confused and eager to learn. This where we form oir faith anew again... Maybe we're not ment to stay without believe for ever. Maybe we should find new purpose after the discovery of inner peace and emptiness. Maybe death is an initiation into a new reality with new believes. A baby does not believe yet and is empty of faith. It represents potential. A baby is thus most susceptable to trauma's and attachments to experiences, like touching a hot fire. While a man can shoothimself in the leg and then do it again just for fun. Because his faith is already in his strength. So with doing comes faith and with faith comes non-doing.

Thank you for reading it.

Herbert Benson says I should meditate! ;P How do I meditate? When I meditate, for example on a word, I try to visualize that word in front of me and focus on the pronouncing sound of that word. I hear it and see the letters, over and over again, untill I loose awareness over my relaxed body. Any other thoughts in my mind, I let go and focus back on my word. Another way is, let the thoughts run trough my mind, stay aware of all my senses and any input that is received. Even when the dream process begins, I allow my thoughts to enhance that without intervering, simply staying aware of the whole process my mind is going trough, even the thoughts. The first method, I don't really understand. Never found clear instructions about that one. You can do it trough all sorts of ways, like yoga, religious prayer, imagining sounds and focusing on that. Even jogging is a meditation on the repeating movement of your feet? Herbert Benson said something about a relaxation response. No idea what that is. Also, do I focus on the letters of the word, do I focus on the thought behind the word, do I focus on the sound of that word, do I focus on the smell of that word, do I focus on the taste of that word? I don't get it all. How does it feel after you have meditated right? Do you feel without much thought, do you still have acces to that creative self? Are you more aware, less distracted by stress, less distracted by the petty details of your life? Less distracted by your lofty aspirations?

Totally in tune with scientific reality. Precize description, backed up by deep and wise philosophy. Thanks for sharing that video. Might not have come across it otherwise.

I hear in libya the banks are not allowed to use money in order to make more money. That would be awesome.

My financial enlightenment came from a dream: we cannot eat money. All you have to do is replace the word money with food and water, then you can complain all you want. Don't complain about a lack of money when you have no idea what it even is! People who travel and complain about money I just want to smack their faces and say "enjoy your money, I'm going to eat chicken." Alot of people fear their money is going away, since this is a monetary system. The real problem is food and water, we should fear that people die of hunger and disease because of lack of healthy food and water. Nature is whats real. Worry about food, then money. When the economy collapses, its not becauze we don't got enough food or money, its just that he whole system is one big failure or outdated. Some even believe the system is designed to keep us working as slaves, slaves that house their selves. Ultimate slavery. Soon we'll have to pay for air too. Then people will really seek financial enlightenment. I'm sure they'll have a perfectly good excuse for us paying for air. "Global warming! Now pay for air, because we've got kill some children who are potential terrorists. Bring them food and water for free? Hell no. Thats bad for the environment. Replace the working children in africa with robots? Hell no thats bad for the economy. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to eat my money du fromage. MMmmmm..." People wont protest unless their system collapses. Look at greece and spain. Took so long for the people to notice all the flaws. When a country suddenly goes bankrupt only then do they realize/accept they've become a modern slave.

All is one means to me: one is all. I think it is important to turn the words around too just for the sake of it. We usually do not realize it but we can draw infinitely new realities from similar experiences. For example, are you now looking at words, letters, Pixels? The entire universe can be found in a single grain of sand. Everything is relative and connected in some way. Even poop has a connection to flowers. Instead of tracing the connection just accept that poop can be a flower aswell. You make it a flower whenever it suits you best. That is enlightenment. For example, on valentinesday you should not enjoy the smell when take a dump in the toilet, but during the date you can denie that you even use toilets or have an anus. You can say that angels pickup all the excess in your belly and transform it into abundant love. Only with wisdom like that can you effectively use this knowledge of allis one and one is all. Enjoy.

I've found that neither money nor desire is the most important thing in life. Money is currently equal to debt. Desires change and never become satisfied. I seek that which does not change, it is within. With this inner truth any life is peaceful. So I just continue on pretending I don't know this is a dream. Unless someone asks ofcourse. I'm going to let this one slip my mouth. Sorry in advance Thanks for sharing the video. I've enjoyed listening to it

Ok, I can totally relate to that. I thought you ment follow your heart as in follow your desires. I know that everything out there is fake. Only our senses and present experiences or feelings are real. I practice lucid dreaming and addepting quickly to new realities. This practice has been really fruitful. Or dream yoga its called? Our thoughts are not in the present. Thoughts derive from the memory and hold the concept of past and future, while in the real world we cannot possible comprehend the true nature of time. I think the answer to this one really lies within. I totally overlooked this one though. Motivation has not got much to do with concentration from that perspective. The illusipn here is that some things are more fun then others. It is an ilusion from the memory that comes up while trying to focus on my goals. My ego was in the way here, I'm embarresed to admit. The topic title should be focus vs flexibilty. Let me share the concept here. Its the least I can do. As I said, my weakness is focus. For example: Goal: Reach the next country C. The road has a huge wall blocking. I start driving on the sand beside the road and make a stop at country G then Eventually I end up in country Z. Got flexibility but no focus. While someome who lacks flexibilty Goal: Reach the next country C. The road has a huge wall blocking. Oh my god a wall. What are we going to do now? My focus is on getting on the other side of the road. You try to ride up to the top of the wall and your engine explodes. Not even realizing that you can ride besides the road on the sand aswell. Focus, but no flexibility. Thanks for the great posts Otis. Very powerful advice indeed. You seem to write from a place of much experience. It is generous.

Both will sit passively and drink tea with eachother. Without ilusions of the mind there is nothing to reflect, nothing to strike against, no reason to fight. When they do fight, My honest believe is that one mirror will eventually snap and let one thought slip into his mind. Then its over. Calll it fate, bad luck, lack of experience. Eventually the whole purpose here is to fight only at the edge of your life. Not sooner not later. This truely is the way of wisdon and peace.

Ok in short. Live without following the heart brings less excitement and thus less sadness aswell? Or would you say thar we can accumulate loce from the outsidr in and be generous with our abundant love that way?

I agree on this. When memory defines who you are, you live an ilusion. Deal with the Past by attending the present. We're a new person every second, our memories do not contain the experience that can be drawn from infinitely. Analyze your past by seeking where it effects your present negatively or positively. No matter how many bad side effects our memories or our past hast has got on us, it cannot easily be killed. You must come in turns with it(am i saying that correctly?). Simply lessen its grasp on us by not dwelling in the past, because in the end most of the past is an illusion. Untill the day your memory is gone, you'll have to make huge efforts to live in the present only in order to live beyond your memories or thoughts of he future. You will find that most of your day goes wasted to dwelling. There has been discovered a new type of memory in science, one that goes beyond your regular memory, it is the memory that cannot be taken away or changed. A subconscous kind of memorythat is all over your brain. Like the memory of riding a bike, even amnesia patients have these memories, but they can't recall them neither necome aware of them. We call this wisdom. Why not kill memory? It will eventually ebb away when your wisdom is mature enough. Eventually you wont need it to live anymore. But it will never be completely gone. I don't suggest you develop amnesia. You can live in the present. This way you natueally cannot dwell in the past or future and your memory or ego naturally has no power over you

That is a truth that is hard for me to face or accept. Sure something I feel like "I cannot just follow my heart! I will become a bum!" Or something like that... then in the end I don't care and becoming a bum is more fulfilling in life. Sometimes I really do desire to just follow my heart, but I wish to live without desire, without trying to fulfill all my egotistic desires or longings of the eye. I want to keep my heart quite, relaxed, chill... In peace... I really do. I no longer wish for excitement nor do I seek it. Paradoxically this way I no longer have all the fear and anger/sadness aswell. My heart is the very thing that allows me to experience every single moment. But my peace does come when I simply do work against my will without thinking about it and then later filling my belly at the end of the day as a reward. All I really want in life is food, thats the truth of my heart here. When I seek love or riches I end up with expenses and fear... My heart still has this ocasional wish to be loved and have alot of riches or abundance, but its almost gone and my days are very peaceful now. So we should not allow the heart to control us right? Just observe the heart and know everything is going ok down there, but you cannot cure your heart from the outside in. "following the heart" seemed to be a solution in the past, but it only seem to cure symptons now... What do you think?

If weakness leaves you vulmerable, then strength will deprive you of love. The Tao somehow seems to prefer flexibility and softness over hardness. If strength means hardness to you, then you should prefer weakness. If strength means durable and flexible, then you should prefer strength. These abstractions change over the course of our live from meaning and leaves us confused. I see them merely as encoded words, not yet translated into usable tools. Power is strength, power is efficient energy use. Avoiding agression is power, avoiding agression is strength. When killing an animal is should be done in a way that is responsible. The powerful now requires wisdom to deal with their power responsibly. You should not let the animal bleed to death with a knife merely out of efficiency. This means you choose to live in a destructive world. Strength cannot be used without wisdom, those two together form politics. So for me weakness is hard, strength is soft.

I think what goldisheavy is trying to say is: What do you mean with balancing the left and right hemisphere? If thats not the case, can you guys still ecplain it to me?

Hey, guys. I have this recurring struggle with making decisions in my education. Everytime I attempt to make a decisions here I cannot make sense of it, get frustrated. Since whatever decision I make is against my own will. I'm gonna explain how and wish you to help solve all conginitive dissonance in general. I just mention my own experience to bring an truthful example to the table here. Cognitive dissonance is an inner struggle of dualities. For example, a smoker might enjoy smoking but wishes to become more healthy. What is the cognitive dissonance? The desire to smoke and the desire to quite smoking. No matter what he does, inner peace will never be found in this area of his life. This is very counter intuitive, since most people struggle their entire life without even realizing this. Cognitive dissonance is usually a lack of clear identity/boundarie/believes/values or any similarity between those. With me, I wish to enjoy my life, and I wish to invest in my self. Enjoying my life, I simply go with the flow and never see the seriousness in anything. Investing in my life, I study and am seriously neglecting my self. I go from study to fun to study to fun and never being content in this area of my life. I've realized this before, but my way of dealing with it was "rather make a wrong decision and learn from it then no decision at all" So making decisions really did help, but my frame of reference has changed from "make wrong decisions untill you find the right one" to "no matter what decision I make, they are all wrong in my eyes. Getting rid of the cognitive dissonance and I don't have to make a decision at all!" This is not ment as an excuse not to have to make a decision, but this struggle simply cannot be solved with impulsivity. I have to sit down patiently, think about my cognitive dissonance and dissolve it like salt in water. When someone says "study" or "fun" I get frustrated and confused, so a little bit angry and other times a little bit anxiety. I might even get fearful. For example when I study, I want to run away from fun impulsively for it WILL ruin my studies, and vice versa. If I have fun, thinking one second about my study and fun is dead. The cognitive dissonance is subconsciously causing this frustration and confusion. The struggle between two opposite values. Currently I run away from fun and stick to my investments like superglue. As you might have guessed, fun is always around the corner and I cannot find the time to succeed in my studies as I constantly get overworked and become tired of motivation. To make it more general and less about me specifically, a smoker might flee from conversations about health, or a quiter might wish to flee from other smokers, especially if they're offering them sigarettes. Or they might feel agitated when people talk about smoking or health, even if they don't show it. This frustration might come out in unexpected ways as in the form of negative energy insufficiently and unwisely spend. I see that with addicts all the time. After a while you can intuitively feel what subjects to avoid. Some people might not avoid their cognitive dissonance and discuss these subjects with emotional attachments. Especially when it is constantly coming up for them, they snap and quite running away from it. These discussions are not wise or fun discussions and usually lead to nowhere. For example, I might get angry and direct it on someone who says "Comon lets have fun/you study too much!" and I respond with "Don't confuse your desires with mine. I don't want to have fun and I'm nothing like you. I am going to study." While 5 seconds later I feel frustrated by my own sentence. cognitive dissonance: "I DO want to have fun and study at the same time, but I can't!" I don't exactly think those words, but I feel the values and emotions behind this cognitive dissonance subconsciously, without realizing where the emotions are coming from. Its like you're trying to find a toilet in Africa and get smacked in the face for being too polite and doing it on the ground. You have no idea what the reason behind the pain is. Cognitive dissonance sux... The problem here is obviously a lack of a clear boundary for a certain area in your life, like cigarettes, health, relationships, studies. For me, I have no clear boundary for my studies. I either study 100% and fail, or I let go of my studies and have fun 100%. So my guess here is: hold both dualities in mind at the same time and find inner peace with them both. But I'm not sure how. Basicly, setting clear boundaries for my self and integrating them into my identity does help. For example, wake up early and study to a certain time so that I have the rest of the day for fun stuff. Sounds pretty stupid, but it does the job. When someone says you study too much, I say "I study from this time to this time." Or when someone says "you smoke to much" you can say "I'm going to smoke untill I have lung cancer" rather then "no I don't!!! You're stupid!" which stems from a lack of identity/boundaries/values. Basicly: know thyself. Perhaps you can take these examples and analyze patterns in your memories for any cognitive dissonance experiences. Any ideas on how to solve these to make a step towards inner peace is very appreciated, along with all other comments about this subject. Thanks in advance.

Weird associations. Gonna read more of this book. It always fascinates me how people can have so many diffrent ways of describing some universal truth of human reality over and over again and the diffrent symbols they put together to explain any concept. In the past magic was like what science and technology is today. We're unsure of its capabilities, but it still fascinates me. No matter how dangerous it is. One should deal responsible with knowledge, for it is like fire.

That sounds interesting, as it looks beyond the concept of language into the physical use and perception of sound. Language is obviously an ilusion and should not be depended upon in your path towards enlightenment. Thats clear to me. What I personally think is that our physical reality is the root of our emotional values and our emotional values is the root of our intellectual believes. Physical reality of nature, emotional reality, intellectual reality. The enlightened returns to his natural self and explores his physical reality to gain the deepest understanding possible. While most people go about enlightenment by exploring their intellectual realities or "illusions." Even exploring your emotional reality can be a huge step towards improving your life. The physical reality overrides all. It is also common most animals. We can even relate to dogs in this journey. My exploration and contemplation on my physical reality really stretched my boundaries in terms of dealing with agression in my own body. The emotional stability stems from these practices and this emotional stabilitiy allows for more productivity, better health and memory. More time efficiency and intellectual succes. There is little emotion standing in between me and my goals thanks to physical practices.

What does Restraining ejaculation mean?