blue eyed snake

so poorold me who had all the joys of sex in my younger years and gave up as an old spiritual daobum will have the best of both worlds? and how translates that in your next incarnation? or does it mean you won't come back here? although i do not yearn to return fast, being in the physical world has a lot of attractions, the green grass, the feeling of sun and wind on your skin, the sweetness of some fruit. Somehow I guess I am gonna miss that after a while

how i would like that the guy on the right is Apech, he has painted his hair and thinks he's still 18, we'll let him eh

Move over a bit, I would like a seat on the bench too, will get some cookies for us to share

I do not know why a minority of people does not feel at home in their bodies, but it is a deep-rooted feeling. And not, what is often thought, a psychological or psychiatric phenomena. Although I guess that currently with all the eyes that are on the alphabet people, some nutty people have gathered under that flag that are mislead ( or worse, misusing it). I would also not rule out that currently some youngsters walk that path just because they can. But at its core these people exist and are now in a same sort of "societal transition-time" as I have seen gays and lesbians go through. Not being pushed into shame and unfit for society, but simply being accepted for having a different sexual attraction then the majority, not a psychiatric condition, no need to "cure" with conversion therapy, just accept us, as we are. I think that there are differences in the fleshbody to be found, but not yet looked for. looking at my own body as a young woman: hands and feet to big ( those feet have never fitted in girl or ladies shoes) too much musclemass ( and a joy to train) brain too analytical, all very unladylike and never have wanted to be that either. ( also hormone levels not fitting into the accepted levels for a female, allergic reaction to estrogens) One day medical people will find physical differences between cis and trans people and as such, when you do want to make groups I guess we will fit in much better with intersex people. here in western society we've tended to make intersex people confirm to being male or female as babies. So as to let them fit in with society. So it is society that cuts humans in 2 different halves and you're not allowed to be different from the norm. But older societies could not do that and have different ways of looking at and integrating ( or not) people diverging from the norm. the first part of my life I lived/masked as a boy/young man. During high-school that was problematic, but after that I became a mechanic and found the same sense of friendship and camaraderie I had with boys when still a child. Oh, they all knew I was a woman, but I was accepted as one of the guys, doing the same chores, and having the same joys. the second part I have tried to live as a woman, it was not successful and it has made me unhappy, the best choice i have ever made was divorce after the kid was of age. That kid interestingly, much later told me: mom, when I was a kid you really were more of a dad then a mom. I never had easy contact with girls, their interests were not mine and it was only deep into my forties that friendships with women developed. I clearly remember the moment when a female friend had to have surgery because of a very high risk on hereditary breast-cancer, a double mastectomy, she told me it hurt her so much as her breasts were part of her female identity just like with all women. I never told her, but at that moment i found myself thinking. Having no breasts would make me happy. Now during the third and last part of my life I am just human, the whole idea of man or woman, one way or the other, has left me. ----- Obviously this whole subject has had my interest for a very long time, I know several trans-people that you would not be able to spot, as they blend so well in the picture we expect with a certain gender. I guess most of us are just trying to blend in were we feel we belong and the portrayal of trans-people as pink and rainbowy dressed up people is cringy to me. there is grumbling about the prides too, too much rainbows and things. but I guess in essence what a pride is...the reversal of shame, I should be ashamed I do not fit in societal norms of what a girl should be, just as back in the days, gays should be ashamed to be attracted to a male, "that's unnatural" I will never forget the teacher that left my primary school because he was a homosexual. Although it was never said out loud by the grownups, all the kids were blabbing about it. Looking back, he was a very feminine man for sure. That was in the sixties lets not repeat such things.

interesting question

i think your mom is a good person

yes, that is a story I've heard from several transpeople, like" oh, i always was like this but socieyl ( parents/sibs/peers) sort of pressured me to conform to the mold. I think in that regard I was lucky with the family i was born into

from a physical point of view, the ease of crying and the acuteness of smell are estrogen related, when I became menopausal i experienced this in the other direction. about the dimming of sexuality, I have never done anything ( hormones/surgery) about the femaleness of my body. I remember being very horny the first year I practised my brand of chigung, like a teenager really. With teacher warning me not to indulge myself

yes, but i think what Apech means is that there is some underlying 'something' that goes deeper then the culturally male/female structure. And I agree with him, imo the cultural thing is too thin to hold the weight of the identity. I am born a girl but at three i asked my 10 year older brother when my peepee would start to grow, he laughed at me and said I would not grow a peepee. Thinking he was making fun of me I ran to mom to ask her. She told me I would not grow a peepee because I am a girl, that troubled me deeply, as i was sure I was a boy. at three, i did not have much knowledge about cultural things. I just thought of myself as a boy.

you should tell us about it, its floating above your right shoulder

ah, like this?

not bad, you remind me of a brother in law when he was younger. Have had so much fun with that guy, and you manifested a nice shiny orb, but I still prefer sweet young ladies.

who are you REALLY? now, for most of us that is an unanswerable question. You do not know who I am REALLY either. I see and read a sweet young lady so I regard her as such. I like sweet young ladies.

Many years ago, before I was a member of this forum, I frantically looked for proof. Now I regard that as a stage i had to go through. As I am now busy with clearing up my home from a lot of accumulated things that need to go I found a paper that impressed me at the time. Were I am sure I had a pdf of this, i guess that has been removed from the web, i did however find it on googlebooks. https://books.google.nl/books?id=D43VJpE3w9UC&pg=PA149&lpg=PA149&dq=jaarboek+integrale+geneeskunde+2010/2011+energiegeneeskunde&source=bl&ots=M0JNVVCAlZ&sig=ACfU3U39gtOXFQL17hr7RqhlODlVs4Zg7g&hl=nl&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiv7t6VvLyFAxUNzgIHHa_mAEAQ6AF6BAghEAM#v=onepage&q=jaarboek integrale geneeskunde 2010%2F2011 energiegeneeskunde&f=false As it is my mother language I will ask @Cobie to translate, i do not have energy for that. but on page 155 it says that during a study were healers were asked to do whatever they do when healing a patient, while their hands were in dark boxes with measuring apparatus. the strength of the field in Gauss was up to 1000 times the normal measure. At that time it was enough 'proof' for me.

oooh, there we go again

I sorta like this one

dance, rhythmical movement, open and close, bellows, yin and yang, now and ever, dance...

will listen to that in the coming days, thanks for posting.

wow, thanks for posting that

thats good, less energy needed for cleaning and combing plus take off when it's hot in summer

perfect, I only need to grow a beard

flaming

belly