Yascra

If we boil it all down what I see remaining is "power" and its abuse.

 

Like for example deleting a post because you don't like the content as an admin, and then put the user on "censorship"-Status.

 

When our society changes its collective attitude enough for women to be able to feel just as safe as men ~ Everywhere They Go ~ Then Men will win, because the women we Love and care for will be safe.

 

I will love the day I feel safe with my daughter/lover/sister/mother leaving the house with the same safety that I do.

It's nice of you to think like this, but, you know.. Having a female body you're just aware that you'll loose when it should come to physical violence. And that's a knowledge you acquire as a teenager when the boys switch to "natural doping", and never really loose.

But, of course, it's positive if you know that at least most of the society will or would help and protect them.

Me: "That's their problem .... actually, I dont have a problem ... other people have problems, like trying to force, persuade and cajole me into doing things I have already clearly told them I dont want to do."

 

Mmmeh ! Its been happening all my life

Hm, not to say too much here, but, you know... as a female you would have had a serious problem in that situation, because as a female you're not necessarily strong enough to defend your "no" as soon as it comes to being grabbed. Let's be honest about it, a female body is designed in a way to make rape an option to create children. And as a female you know you don't have the physical strength to do much about it, unless you spend a relevant amount of your time with fight training and, most effective, expose your body to doping.

With a female body, in that situation in which the overall group wouldn't support you, you might well have had the option to leave the scenery. Otherwise your options would have been limited.

Thanks needs to go to Tyler too as it was he who tried to have a constructive discussion of the concept of yin/yang, masculine/feminine.

 

I like to talk about harmony. That is, the harmony of yin and yang in all aspects of our life. Harmony is having the proper amounts of yin and yang at the proper time. Too much ynag? Add some yin. Too much yin? Add some yang. More than one always sounds better when they are in harmony.

 

Hm, yes, I feel and appreciate that I think it was an idea with positive intention. Although I have to say that this nick looks like a sleeper, and I really don't see how to trust persons who don't dare to show themselves.

But that hasn't really happened in this thread. Sure, we have compared and contrasted but we've not gotten to the insults which are typical of these kinds of threads.

Yes. Thanks to you and thanks to two or three other guys who gave some counterweight.

And thanks to some reactions to reports.

And I would have preferred it if people would have actually discussed the question:

"What can feminism do for Men", but that didn't happen.

 

I'm not the one who put the thread in the off topic forum, if that's what you mean.

 

So, do you have any thoughts about what feminism can do for men?

If not, you're off topic. YOU are a derailer.

 

Yes, and intentionally so. I didn't like this topic right from the start, cause right from the start it was clear that this would be an invitation towards people who linger around with an interest to insult and hurt any female member of this board here.

And without some guys who intentionally worked on keeping a balance here, which I'm thankful for, it would just be another sign for females that contribution in such an environment is a stupid waste of time.

It made it to page 11 with no suspensions or bans and not the pit; not even locked!!!!! That is really good for a thread on most topics.

 

Hey, the "women lack consciousness"-Thread did also make it quite far, and also without bans and suspensions, and beginning from page 4 most posts were insultive, and the intention of the whole thread was insultive right from the start; yet, even reports would hardly have brought this thread even to the pit, and suspensions or bans for any members are something that I think still didn't take place.

So obviously this kind of measurement doesn't necessarily tell more than that the topic is not amongst what the mod team considers as having priority or being important in any way.

Oh no, ladies first, I insist.

 

Yeah, I did get you're a cutie ^^

 

Anyway, I'm more gay actually, not too much interested in heteros.

Actually, you'd be surprised.

 

I think you would. But to wait for some people to develop sensitivity would really take too much time.

@tyler zambori, I really don't get what you're aiming at, I would just prefer you'd use your main account for it.

Must be creepy. Must be a weirdo. Must be a misogynist. Must be abusive towards women behind closed doors. After all, if he wasn't, he'd have a girlfriend, he wouldn't be a 26 year old virgin.

 

Honestly, prostitutes are not so bad for the problem of you being a virgin, and if you find a nice one she might be more kind to you than some females out there.

That is, if the problem really is about sex.

 

Yeah, I know, you will turn this argument around and make it seem like I was the one who brought up the topic of sex ^^

 

PS: For solution of the problem I'd really focus more on the egoist thing. Nobody really likes to be with an egoist.

Not like they come up to women and act like a jerk at first. No they wait a few months for that (or weeks depending). Wait until the women has fallen for them, then act like their actual selves.

 

Well, you see my practice - with a little help of mine at least this last Zhang didn't need more than half a dozen posts to have some mistakes of his character formulated clearly, and still I would not expect he has the slightest intelligent thought of questioning any of it.

But at least he has become more honest about it.

 

History has taught me that all great men are hopeless egoists, so thank you very much for the complement

 

Aha, suddenly it's history and not the evil females. Thanks for being sufficiently honest

I think regarding the fact that we're writing on a forum that focuses on spirituality we're both clear that this conversation is finished. Maybe you make a new start somewhere by questioning your interpretation of history or your impressions about what makes someone a great person.

The asshole with 150% of resources, with 150% success, gets rewarded 150% by 150% of women!

150% of women would definitely be so much that it would cover me.

Why do you focus on the idiotic females and why is it them you'd like to get? Maybe change your social environment, ever thought about that? Cause something seems to be wrong with yours.

But maybe I'm surrounded by too much feminists ^^ Cause actually the kind of women you describe don't even make 10% of those I know .. but well .. I tend to avoid persons who don't stand on their own feet.

But maybe I'm a hopeless romantic, eh?

 

Tbh, and I do absolutely not apply that on every accidental crossing male being, most of your words sounded more like those of a hopeless egoist who doesn't care too much about needs and desires as long as they are not his own

do I have to please him?

 

If he's not a good person, my experience is that his answer will be "yes, otherwise I don't need to waste my efforts on you".

And that might well hold true if the main efforts for holding up that relationship haven't even been made by him, but by her, lol

 

Of course there are not only bad men. But some relevant portion of males seems to grow up with this idea that someone has to please them. Like, it's part of male socialization that one or half a seat in the bus is not enough, if you're a real guy you need at least one-and-a-half seat, cause you have to show you're a big guy with a big ego.

 

I had to learn some of those shit you're raised with, for better "passing as male", and it can be regarded as funny from some perspective, but if you look closely I tend to more pity you for growing up with some amount of pressure to behave like an asshole. Most be double as hard to break out of this.

Is there room for such a scenario in the feminism narrative? Or is she merely a warped identifier with her patriarchal captor?

 

lol

 

Sure, if women were good-hearted feminists like me, they wouldn't wish that men completely succumb to their sexual desire.

 

Of course bad women exist who abuse that men are horny, and in that case I'd wish to the better examples of men they would cultivate sufficiently to not have themselves manipulated that way. But unfortunately those are lessons neither men nor women like to listen to.

 

Actually, as I feel it, and as I practice it, feminism means to find your strength in yourself, and really be yourself, including those parts of yourself that society tells you should not be part of females (and to once again bring that up, many, MOST societies on this planet have extremely harsh and painful ways to deal with persons who don't fit into what's expected of them, for men as well, but women do not rarely suffer pain, torture and death even if they haven't even been the person transgressing some of the stupid rules; e.g. it's not uncommon that a women will be stoned to death because some men have raped her .. and no, her will and health don't play a role in either the rape nor the decision that she'll suffer death for it; she is killed because she had sex with a person she's not married to. Period.).

I really don't need a man to get my sexual needs fulfilled, nor do I manipulate men in a sexual way to get money or anything else, and I find such behaviour disgusting. But these manipulative behaviour is really not what is taught by feminists, that's actually more part of anti-feminist women who don't see a need to take care of themselves and instead prefer to stick to role-models.

And you cut straight to a monetary/prostitution example.

 

Could you please tell me how you arrived at that conclusion?

Because money is used to counterweight "effort" in society.

 

The rest of your response is mainly leading into an interpretation that's not really fitting.

 

You were the one who brought up the topic of sex, your need and greed desire for it, as well as the topic of some imagined "right" to have sex (if your effort has been sufficient).

You brought it up and for clarification and to give you an opportunity fur further insight, I gave you some thoughts from sides of a person who, yes, would deny sex for "efforts".

 

I felt some complaining tone in your first post concerning girls or women who don't "value"/"pay back" "efforts" (and once again, in Western society money is what is used to calculate the size of an effort) with sex, and I just explained what might be some mistakes in that approach. If you're perfectly fine I don't get what you're complaining about.

You don't need to turn it around. I'm a cultivator, I've gotten rid of sexual desires to a large extent, and actually that's better if you want to progress in meditation practice.

If it is, I say that's a somewhat warped view of entitlement. Entitlement is something for nothing. When you put effort into something, into someone, and that doesn't get returned... then... I don't know what it is, but that's what happens.

 

So you think that every girl is basically a prostitute (hey, it is not "something for nothing", it is "something for something else"), so if you spend money on her with this you automatically get the right to fuck her...?

 

Maybe get a rubber doll?

 

Is the conclusion of your post now that you got rid of the advice of your mother to find a good partner and you took a sexmachine that's not using her brain too much or what exactly did you try to express?

 

Btw, nobody says there are no stupid girls outside who'll fuck guys who are not good for them, and other way round.

My ex-partner had even had a partner who wanted so much sex that finally HE was exhausted, lol, although he really was a sex addict who couldn't do without masturbation for more than half a day... and still he didn't get the lesson that demand, demand, demand is not how you'll get a great partnership, neither great sex.

That's the problem with guys like you, you know. Why not visit a prostitute and then start looking for a partner out of a relaxed state instead of motivated by some sexual urges? Do whatever you wish with a partner who is okay with that, as long as you're willing and able to afterwards pay for the products of what you're doing, I would say (and yes, it is the woman who will lateron have to make the hard decision for or against abortion if there should evolve products of sex that don't fit into your way of life, and might well loose a part of her physical health should she decide to give birth).

 

Well, honestly, I didn't get whether you now got your "class two girl" instead of looking for the "class one girl" your mother advised you to look for. Hey, I am a female and a spiritual cultivating person. Guess how hard it is to find a MALE partner who cultivates his body AND mind. Tbh, I don't search amongst humans any more .. if you're a little bit sensitive you notice very fast whether someone will be good for you or not .. and greedy and selfish persons are rarely good for you, no matter what the sex/gender is.

That's why I tend to like to have contact to cultivated persons, you know, no matter how far away they are .. because an exchange of energies does really not depend so much on the physical distance, and this kind of a connection to some good person or cultivators out there is still better than being close to a non-cultivator in a physical sense.

 

It is ALWAYS hard to find people who have a good character, which would be valuing hard work etc. But, honestly .. you say "if I put in something, I want something out of it" .. in other words .. you are looking for a prostitute, not for someone who values your character .. and a relevant part of your motivation seems to be sexual greed. Hey, it's okay if you're a worse person than what your mother wanted you to become, you know. But, honestly .. this attitude of yours is exactly what would motivate me to stick away from a guy like you should we meet in real life. A sensitive person just notices that someone else thinks he has a right to do to their body what s/he would like to, and the question is just, to what degree you will be willing and practicing violence to get it. Psychological pressure you've already tried to play out, and most girls who are not very aware they are NOT prostitutes will be impressed by it...but be assured, if you want prostitute-like sex, that will hardly ever be GREAT sex.

I doubt that this way and with this ideas of what you think is your right to "get", you'll get someone with a good character .. because a good character is simply not what you offer, and a good character also doesn't seem to be what you are looking for.

 

There are prostitutes, there are pron vids, there are rubber dolls and other toys to give your body relaxation, if wasting energy is the only way for you to relax your body. It's really not the duty of any other human being.

 

Btw.. if you'd like to get something like me - no, I did already get that you're not interested in having a partner who is strong, interested in self-cultivation and working on being a good person in way that's beyond "always being nice" - you would well have to accept that I might spend some time with people, and they might like to start calling this a relationship etc .. but well, if I'd like to have sex with some other guy, we will need long talks until you accept that no girl-friend's vagina is something you own. If she wants to get something from someone else, why should you have any right to forbid that .. you don't own her genitals.

Same way other way round of course, as long as "we" don't end up poor because he has to pay for a dozen children out there (yes, Sex can have consequences, and on an energetical level it almost always will as well, so don't fuck persons who are bad for you; not even to talk about things like AIDS). I don't get all this "ownership" stuff in relationships.. what's the problem if a person you love has fun with someone else? If it's a good relationship it shouldn't take damage from that ..and why not wish all the best and all the greatest experiences to a person you sincerely love?

 

Btw.. I do know girls who maybe would make a partner for people like you. You would end up hurting each other in the long run, but as long as you're both happy with having some sex... well. Anyway .. even for getting those girls it might be of advantage if you would spend a little thought on the question that: Maybe a woman will be more interested to have sex with you if she gets the feeling that she will GET something great by having sex with you, and not that she will have to serve your wishes as kind of a prostitute. There are girls out there who are way more interested in having sex than in having a great relationship as well .. but these girls also want to have their fun and joy out of it, and not serve some boring guy who just wants to have the living counterpart of a rubber doll.

Your words sound like you fit the latter category. Maybe think about it.

 

We may well be going backwards.

 

omfg, it took me some time to realize that this stupid watching woman was really trying to blame the guy who was disturbed during showering. I think the most natural thing to do would have been to give the girls some hint that this behaviour is not ... nice? :-p

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So what was this Big Super Mario thing doing here?

 

Aye, some people around were surprised when I stated I'm okay with army. Said they would have expected I'm a pacifist. Well, I am. I just don't think you'll be able to keep peace and wellbeing without a army that's able to protect those.

Doesn't mean that I'm happy when a situation arises in which war is necessary. But I just don't think it's realistic to hope that you'll be able to maintain some things if nobody's there to fight for them. There'll always be people who won't accept other people's wish to live in peace and prosperity.