Buddy, I am sorry.

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I am sorry. I should not have told you to speak up or shut the fuck up.

Since the offence was public, the apology ought to be public, too.

Please, understand, I felt bullied, and so I reacted, as I do in those cases from a few years; I hit back with double the strength. So, yes, I would have done the same if you were here.


Except that now I would not do it anymore: I now can see how unconfortable is the place where you are, and I do not wish to exacerbate this situation more.


If in the course of your studies you have discovered things that can harm our teacher, your love for Bruce and for the work that he is doing, will stand in opposition to your love for Truth. And where do we stand respect to those two principles only depends on who we are. But neither is intrinsically superior. So, yes, understanding who you are would ultimately be the only way out. I am not telling this to preach you, but just to share what I have discovered in the course of my studies. Like you wanted to share with me what you knew in the course of your studies. I know you probably already know it, and your latest posts shows it, too. But a lot of other people will be reading this entry, and they deserve an explenation too.


So, to continue my explenation for the sake of completion, there are some people for whom Truth is more important than Love or Compassion. And others for whom Love or Compassion is more important than Truth. According to Buddhism, eventually is only through Compassion that the human condition is solved. Still there are great authorities on the "Truth above all" side too. Gandhi, for example.


Each of us must find their position in this dicotomy, which obviously have many other positions too. I, for example, am on the truth side. I can never find peace in untruth, Gandhi's autobiography resonated deep in me, and because of this I invited you to speak, feeling that in the long run the truth is always the best way forward. But this was because of who I am. Not because of who you are. There are plenty of people, instead, who feel that Compassion is more important than Truth. My father, for example, and for this in the past I have often been scolded for being too honest, harming in this other people. But many other people as well; all those, for example, that ascribe to the "he (or she) does not need to know, and it would only harm him (or her)" philosophy. People on the truth side are often accused of being unkind, and cruel. People on the compassion side are instead often accused of being hypocrite, or just lazy (confort loving).


So, please, accept my apology. I could not at the time appreciate the inner struggle you were going through. Although I know I cannot free you of it, I hope this, at least will make it lighter.



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