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Moon Knight


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Ok, so, as a rule I don't go around saying "salutations"; not one of those guys. Of course by saying that I'm being questionably judgmental. But that is what this post is about right, saying something about me... the good the bad and the ugly.


I usually am one to skip the whole "introduce yourself" post, and jump right into a discussion for any number of personal reasons, but today or rather this moment I feel particularly reflective and expository. In fact, at this very moment I feel this very strange inner floating kind of feeling that I haven't felt in quite a long time. It's been one of those days.


For all the presumed ups today there have been plenty of seeming downs, and there is probably some part of me that is still tempted right now to hold onto those points of view, but at the same time there is an overwhelming sense that the ups and downs are really nothing more than what I create through interpretation. There were just some events today...


I've skimmed this forum for information/discussions in the past... checked out recently too... and been lurking today, again skimming for viewpoints. About two hours ago I got kind of cloudy/tired, laid down, read a bit of the Tao Te Ching and then a bit from a book on nei jia quan, masturbated, and then became at once very weak and very clear. I couldn't think entirely straight, yet if I relaxed and didn't TRY to think or do things I could perceive rather clearly myself and my thoughts/feelings. Soon after I nearly passed out of consciousness but retained decent awareness while my body became even more cold and exhausted than it had been BEFORE going to lay down.


About an hour later I finally told myself it was time to fight my way up, lest I became stuck in bed. Here I lost some of the Tao I think. But since arising... and a bit fretfully googling, messaging, and reflecting.... I've slipped in further back into it, or so I believe... to the point I have this overall sense of inner weightlessness and strong mind body connection. I drank an energy drink too, that may have helped.


I needed an outlet for my reflection, and I need answers and guidance whether it comes from my own reflection (I learn a lot about myself by talking to others, whether they say anything profound or not) or from the generous assistance of fellow seekers.


Hmm... to wrap it up, a little bit more pragmatically....


I've dabbled on and off with qigong, meditation, and western magick for 4 or 5 years now, but about nine months ago I started seriously exploring qigong again. I started with the Eight Pieces of Brocade and some simple navel focused deep breathing. Soon after I took up bagua zhang and have been practicing open hand and staff forms. More recently I've also been training some long fist style kung fu and staff form, and have been working on opening the microcosmic orbit. If it is not open, it is very close, though I obviously need to smooth it out more than simply focusing on each successive point as I circle the body.


In about a month I'm going to go to one of Michael Winn's weekend workshops to hopefully refine my orbit and learn some new meditation and qigong techniques. After the new year my bagua teacher is going to shift the focus of our class to tai chi for awhile. I hope at that point to start learning the pure yang sword form as well.


Glad to be here.

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