Flolfolil

Oh yeah forgot to mention.

To anyone worrying about my condition, i just did my morning practice and most of the pain seems to have gone away and i am no longer freaking out

Have you read Bodri and Nan's big book on measuring meditations? I seem to remember it explains about how qi penetrates and cleans,and some of the sensations concerning organs. But it might otherwise fill in some of the holes in your knowlege of physiological phenomena of spiritual evolution.

That book sounds pretty cool, unfortunately i don't have the 100$ to purchase it, or any money at all. If i did i would probably spend it on a teacher. The last year has given me so many problems that seem like they could have been avoided if i had someone to instruct me instead of fooling around on the internet. Have you seen how many yoga books have lotus as the first posture they show, with no warnings?

Thank you i was scared to continue practicing today but i guess i will after doing some more reading

well basically all i do is some head/face massage, rubbing my hands together, arm swings where i tap myself on front and back, whatever spontaneous movements come to me, dan tian focusing to end.

i also do some very gentle yoga postures, with no locks because i started getting pain when doing root lock.

and then there's these things: http://www.jamesclairlewis.com/pages/metaphysics/occult.html This is the set of exercises that gave me the ability to move my consciousness through my body and then random things started happening - the first of which was increased pressure in my head which is pretty much always present. Sometimes it can get bad and i have to move my awareness lower to relieve it. The effects of the exercises seem to do something like what i feel when i take a melatonin pill and i become conscious in my dreams.

i do all of this sitting down, and everything is extremely gentle because i am recovering from a knee injury.

well the only thing i have had was a little pain(abdominal and rectal) a year ago when eliminating, and a doctor told me i needed fiber. i got fiber, the problem cleared up. This doesn't feel the same at all though

Every time i focus on my stomach area i start to hear/feel liquids dropping down. Also while doing 2nd chakra work a few days ago that area went numb and i couldn't feel it for 10 minutes or so

Was tested for diabetes/high blood pressure because it runs in my family and i have been reacting differently to salt and sugar but they told me nothing was wrong

Other than that the rest of me feels alright

For a little while now i have been doing a bit of qigong i picked up from a book. i have done yoga for about a year and i found that raising energy made me feel too crazy and start hallucinating. Then i found qigong and i liked how the downward flow stopped my hallucinations. Problem is, now that my focus is more on my dan tian area when i become stressed out instead of my limbs shaking now my internal organs do. i have absolutely noone to turn to to ask what is happening to me on a physiological level, as the person who instructed me to draw my awareness internally has only energetic/spiritual knowledge of the body and no scientific (at least he wouldn't tell me when i asked if he did)

TLDR - i am aware of my organs and have control over my bloodflow but when i become stressed i can't handle it and my body gets all screwed up

Thank you for any help you can give

i have been lurking here for a while. Hope i can get some of my questions answered here Hi everyone