Josama

A few months back I had a vision of a chinese man with white hair and white beard, he reminded me of Laozi. Then I had annother vision of the small hut he lives in. Recently I asked him for help and the name Laoshan popped into my head. Now, I would like to find him for personal reasons. How hard could it be going by these clues? Anyone ever tried something similiar?

The funny thing is I know if I weren’t attached to it I would be able to find him easily, considering the destiny I have with him. 

Not TCM doctor, but I can recommend Sifu Jenny, easterninternalarts.org. She does sessions over Skype. I know she is an expert when it comes to diet/nutrition.

No! It means that I am observing and listening. What part of my lengthy explanations are confusing you. I am a retired Lecturer at the University level. If I gave you a mid term exam and you answered the way you've responded to my posts regarding same, I would have given you an "F."

 

Either you are playing the Devil's Adovcate, or you do not have an aptitude for the Subject Matter. Please stay on topic which is "Why I cannot rely on Philosophy." This one of the rules for the Doa Bums, stay on topic.

 

I do not want to discuss Psychology any longer with you because you are either tying to aggravate me, or you really are not getting it. One way or the other, Please take it somewhere else e.g. your own Personal Discussion Post and get off my Post.

 

I just look at your profile and understand how it is that your are responding the way you do. When I was 26 I thought I knew everyting. :-) It is arrogant and disrescpecful for you to posts your challenges on my thread without verifiable and reliable data.

 

I do not believe in opinions, nor do I trust them which means I do not trust your Motives.

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I would say modern psychotherapy is still very much an art form, you can't impose any sort of strict guideline to the way you interact with a client, rather the more open and less rigid you are with the way you treat the person the more success you are likely to get. Psychology on the other hand is turning into more of a science with cognitive neuroscience and brain imaging and things like that. But even then the 'hard problem of consciousness' has not come anywhere near to being solved, scientists still have absolutely no idea how or even if the brain and body produce consciousness, it is a complete assumption that it does so.

 

Therefore I wouldn't rely on psychology too much as the most primary fundamental ground of it which underpins it all is up for grabs, ie if you are not your mind/body and you are not defined your psychology then what you are may go far deeper than anything psychology can ever touch. In some ways psychology is just a way of rearranging the chairs on the deck of Titanic, it may make it nicer for a while but it is still going under. The deeper issues still remain,.

 

Not that philosophy really helps here either, unless it can point you towards doing your own individual investigation in your own being around these issues. But in reality most philosophy usually prevents rather than enables you to do that by keeping you in the realm of mind rather than in the realm of experience. A lot of it is more like mental masturbation, the mind saying how clever and wonderful the mind is in its own circular world, until life bumps up against it inevitably shattering its conclusions.

 

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Freud did not use logic/intellect. His patient laid there on a couch and "freely associated" meaning whatever came into their mind they talked about it. Freud used alot of dream analysis, and symbolic intrepretation based around the struggle between the id, ego, and super ego. His theory was that people are sexually driven and always in conflict with and controled by their id.

 

He also gave his patient's Cocaine to help them. That was not a logical thing to do to their nervous system. He was a "coke" user as well.

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I don't understand, so you already have an idea who your master will be? Is it someone you ever met before?

 

IMO, life on the road is just as potent as any lessons or insights I have ever had with one person. Granted, I have never had a "guru" or "master" -- but I have met loads of people, some my age, some my parents or grandparents age, some of which very wise people. You can get a lot out of talking to people, not so much that they will answer or solve anything for you, but just that it is nice to feel connection and to learn from other people's life stories.

 

Yet for me it is the transience, the dynamic nature of travel, that can be a powerful teacher by putting us in different situations, some of which can be very challenging. You might spend a week in a busy city, living with a bunch of people who are getting wasted in dorms, and then spend the next week in the wilderness doing a meditation retreat. It chagnes fast. In some ways, it is similar to meditation/psychedelics in that it can trigger some altered states of consciousness.

While you will probably be fine, it is a good idea to have a back-up/return plan just in case things don't go so great there or you just don't like it. Especially if you have not traveled much before. Some people expect to like travel a lot, but end up not really liking it, or vice versa -- it is hard to know until you have been doing it for a little bit. Just a warning though, travel brings out extreme feelings. I've felt the most ecstatic moments of bliss, powerful insights... and then also some crazy low moments of depression, anxiety, self-hatred, etc. If you already feel "extreme," travel will likely be even more that way. Especially with solo travel, for all that time to be alone with our selves.

 

What are you looking for in a master? I am curious. Also, where do you think you will go to look for one once you arrive?

Well the first thing I am looking for in a master is humor....

Shopping at the markets is a pretty cool, interesting experience.  It can really challenging to try to bargain with someone while barely speaking their language... and then you feel good when you get a good price on something.  Not only that, but it is nice to support local economies and the clothes IMO is cool looking and often fits better than western clothes.  Sure it can be considered "touristy" but I don't think that should stop anybody from experiencing another place and culture.

 

To "bring an end to confusion," I would definitely recommend time in nature, which would make a tent very useful.  I don't think you need to go all the way to SE Asia, although it may definitely help.  Just to spend time in nature wherever we go, in solitude, can really help clear things up.  I don't know if confusion ever ends, even for enlightened beings... but I would not know as I am not one.  When I travelled, I often wondered "am I running away from something or am I running towards something?"  It could be quite confusing, but ultimately I realized I am running towards being present, seeing myself and reality clearly, and running away from illusion, living in untruth and habitual thinking and patterns.  Travel was just a tool in this greater quest, but a powerful tool indeed.  I am still confused, flawed, etc. -- but travel did help me have a bit more patience, and faith in the cosmos (which is faith in All that Is, quite useful for a former skeptic and pessimist).

 

Obviously, your experience will be unique but I have a good feeling it will be helpful.  Travel is something I'd always recommend to people, if they have the time and some degree of mental/emotional stability, that is.  Are you getting a one-way ticket or one with a return flight?

The problem is that I have absolutely no mental/emotional stability at all. I am quite insane actually, maybe not unmanagably so, but I am not far. I guess the buddhist term 'hungry ghost' describes my state well. Sometimes I just want to end it all because I can't deal with these intense feelings. The only thing that keeps me going is that there is still hope when I leave. I know that at least now, at this time there is no way of changing anything. I have been in therapy since june last year, however there has been no change at all. So I have decided that I should look for a master that I trust, he should know what to do.

I just realized that I forgot the most thing : I can't eat spicy food, (anything with chillies in it) because I have an allergy to it. So how careful do I need to be?

RigdzinTrinley : Thanks for the rest info. To be honest I am a terrible haggler because I can't say no to people and have low self-esteem in general. Are you going to attend the Kalachakra Initation in january?

Futuredaze : I have only camped a handful of times in my life^^ Truthfully, I don't plan to buy anything or do anything that could be considered tourism. I doubt I will be buying any souvenirs or clothes. All I want is to bring an end to my confusion.

Thelerner : thx, I will look into it.

Dustybeijing : The only reason I am really planning to bring a laptop is to communicate with my family back home and for couchsurfing. Hmm now that I write it like that it seems all the more obvious not to take one. The mobile should be enough and I won't get a headache worrying about it.

Songstan : I am not a big fan of vegetables so you don't have to worry anout that. About looking tough part : I doubt I need to worry about that. Although I am only 1,85 m tall I have quite the broad shoulders/ back body build, like a scottish Highlander. Also, I have 'sharp' eyes. (Sadly) I certainly don't look like easy prey with or without beard.

Taoist Texts : I hate crocs...

The countries I will visit for sure are India and Taiwan. Inbetween I will probably stay in (South) China or I might go to Thailand instead, but I doubt I will do both.

To be honest I don't plan to do that much backpacking, but rather I will try to spend at least a month at one monastery. Along the way I will also try and let myself be driven off along the river and see where I end up. However, I am highly unlikely to visit any countries as far south as Malaysia.

I already spent some time in Senegal before so I know already a little about what to pay attention to. The question was really just meant in regards to the equipment I should bring. Also, should I bring a notebook or use internet cafes on the go? I am really thinking of taking no electronics at all apart from my mobile....

I am wondering what equipment you can recommend for a trip to SE Asia. I am looking for a good bagpack that is waterproof and will allow me to pack my yoga mat.

What kind of shavor is preferable?

Should I bring a tent? (stupid question maybe)

Anything else, apart from the most obvious?

It depends what you understand under 'like'. Some masters use the term 'like' instead of 'clinging'. However, I found that you also like something without being attached. The only way really to tell is how you feel during the activity and after. If you are aligned with the Tao during an activity you will find that your mind clears up, time is forgotten, you don't feel exhausted, there is happiness and serenity.

Contrary, if you indulge in activity you are attached to, there is a lot of anxiety involved. It may make you feel alert during the activity, in an adrenaline kind of way, but after you are finished you will feel drained in a bad.

I would also love to have one, please 

well seems like you are on the way to making progress, all the best to you.

 

one thing though, you might be surprised at what getting in front of a teacher can do for you as transmission cuts right through the bullshit.

 

w.

Yes, but I wasn't really talking about energy. I know that is the one thing that can't be replaced and that's exactly why I am going to a monastery, that and the community life....

If you go to a big monastery, you will find that energy permeates the whole environment and you don't need to be in a direct contact with a master.

i hope you're able to resolve things Josama but I wouldn't expect much progress until the masturbation thing is under control and certainly not until you stop using visual stimulation for it. i know about this issue from personal experience - the energy you're experiencing in your head is directly related to the fact you've conditioned yourself to get off on certain imagery. sexual energy is travelling up hitting certain areas of the brain and around the eyes. it's a dopamine thing too, as you're aware. that's the most obvious part, but there's likely a whole load of incoherent energy throughout your energy structure associated with this behaviour (eg spleen, heart, liver, groin & hips area) that you're not yet mindful of. if you get to the stage where you're not masturbating but having wet dreams i believe that's a sign of good progress.

 

it's all karmic and strong conditioning based off something that is already incredibly powerful (lust). my advice for going cold turkey would be to get into a retreat environment for several weeks or longer and avoid technology if that's a trigger. i actually think i may have attracted an entity through some of my behaviours in the past, much like you describe. funny thing is i was totally unaware of it until i went on a retreat and started being cleansed through the teachers energy field. i think this must have flushed it out because first night it sneaks into our bedroom and starts causing a hassle including attacking me. thankfully someone else told the teacher (i was pretty shaken up and we were in silence) and he quickly located it and told it to bugger off. i only found this out at the end when we broke silence and i while i can't be sure the entity was related to me, i have a feeling it was.

How much is a life worth to me?  To save one's physical life,  there can be a price. To save one's spiritual life, there is no price that can be set. And yet people who charge thousands to get a entity removed have put a price on the spiritual life of another. They will pay the the price for themselves later.  

 

If you think you are dealing with a spiritual issue and want answers, look for that which cannot be bought.  Fresh air, clean water, some herbs, and sunlight -- these are a start.  A mind that is heavily burdened by ideas of entities has already lost another priceless thing, their freedom. 

 

All beliefs are temporary.  Some beliefs are helpful and supportive. Most are not.

Hi Josama,

 

 

(1) If you really think what you are writing, then walk your talk: You can stop masturbation now with any recovery program, book or whatever distracts you or help you delaying doing what you have to do to save your life.

If your life is at stake, things get pretty simple, unless you are not 100% convinced it is.

 

(2) You asked for a healer, giving the precision that you didn't want anything New Agey. Ok.

So you are calling x times per day Amitabha Buddha... Are you Buddhist or are you just using Amitabha Buddha's name like a magic bullet without any Buddhist Faith or practice? In the latter case, you are just falling into the New Agey behavior.

 

If you want to get out of your problem, if you feel your life is really at stake (is it or not?), if you feel some connexion with the Buddha, be consistent:

-Follow the Buddhist Path

-Find a Tibetan Buddhist teacher- expose your problem to him/her.

-Go for refuge, take precepts.

-Practice since your life depends on it.

-Take completely charge of your life.

 

Otherwise it is just empty talk. It has been months and months that you are living like this. Are you really caring about what threatens your life or are you just finding some more excuses to go on piling up bad karma and destroying your life?

 

No healing can take place without you, and outside your own mind.

 

edited for spelling

Fighting demons and entities can become a hobby.

A sense of purpose it bestows:

For the inflicted,

I am fighting for my life and purging myself of evil.

For the healer,

I am fighting for his life and serve as the voice of dharma/gospel/Tao.

 

Psychologically,

focusing on entities are a type of mental dissociation.

We are all a mix of good and evil.

When I say I have an entity,

I separate the negative aspect of my being and treat it as something external.

I ignore the internal evil to deal with the external evil that has invaded me.

 

The fight between the heavens and earth will always ensue

when the mind is not at peace.

The unrest is surely time immemorial,

but more common in people who are hyperreligious and undeveloped.

Chuang Tzu once said, "Heaven and earth and I are One!"

But who will listen to the indifferent sage?

In unity there cannot be fight.

 

10000s of Ah Mi To Fu's chanted,

12,000 dollars paid,

many healers visited,

some lessons sure cost more than others.

But we all learn so slowly,

there is no one we can blame.

 

It's not healthy for the living to think of entities.

Leave that to the dead and dying.

It's better to be normal and natural.

We are all human beings with problems,

None of us are special.

These problems can be gently improved by normalcy and calmness of mind.

With no exception,

We are nourished by the sun, healthy gentle exercise, good water, and a healthy diet.

Let the mind think of no abnormal thing.

That is a source of true spiritual power.

I agree with about 99% of this, particularly the thing about some lessons sure cost more than others, just not money, money is no cost, money compared to life is worth nothing, even if I had to pay 50000, 100000 or a million to get my health back, I would still gladly pay it. How much is a life worth to you?

Josama, if you're still masturbating a lot you could give The Open-Focus Brain book + cd a try.

 

My theory around internet porn masturbation is the heavy use of computers / phones in narrow focus mode causes irritability and tension which the body wants to release. Then porn is the outlet.

 

The key is then to release narrow focus which is only needed for very specific situations and not all the time.

 

Open-Focus is what others call open awareness but this time a scientific method is used based on getting the mind accustomed to focusing on space around objects and thus release the gripping mechanism.

 

If this does not apply for you, please ignore it.

I am already working on my masturbation habit, this is actually my first priority at the moment. If you are interested on the subject or anyone else I recommend you read the book Out of the shadows : Understanding sexual addiction. As for treatment recoverynation.com 

Yes, regardless of whether in truth you are possessed or not, cultivating the storyline that you are certainly isn't helpful.

You are right, but I don't want, it's just that the people cause me to do just that : I just asked for a healer who offers an entity removal service and people come talking about entities so of course I answer their questions truthfully. 

Do you do any physical exercise or some Chi kung?

oh soory centertime totally overlooked that, I do Northern Shaolin Kung Fu, no Chi Kung

Hello Josama. Since you seem to have an affinity for chanting mantras, then one possibility for you to consider is to do research on mantras and try to find one that that is the most suitable for your particular situation. For example, there are many different Sanskrit mantras which are for many different very specific purposes. The idea being that mantras evoke a very specific energetic response from the 'universe' based on the specific seed sounds which are contained in any given mantra. Some mantras are more generic in purpose and some are very specific in purpose.

 

Here is an example of a very simple Sanskrit mantra which is described as being for the purpose of 'bringing in the light that removes afflictions':

Om Arkaya Namaha

 

I am no expert on mantras by any means, but it seems it is often recommended that you chant a mantra at least 108 times in a chanting session, and chanting does not have to be out loud. You can apparently say it silently to yourself with your mind, at least according to one source I have encountered.

 

According to Thomas Ashley-Farrand in his book 'Healing Mantras', you should ideally chant a mantra like above for at least 125,000 times, done over a period of a few months to achieve the full 'mantra siddhi', but I would think you may possibly start to see some results long before then as you recite the mantra from day to day. Since it is a short mantra, even if you only chant for short periods of time throughout the day, the total repetitions would start to add up quickly over the weeks and months. The above mentioned short mantra could probably be easily chanted 30 times a minute, so in just 15 minutes that would be 450 repetitions, which is 900 repetitions in 30 minutes total of chanting per day. Maybe a fair bit of effort to put in on a day to day basis, but possibly something worth looking into if you feel an affinity towards mantra chanting.

 

Light and strength.

Thanks, I actually already tried this quite some time back. However, today after having practiced quite a bit with pure land recitation, I am of the opinion that there is no real difference between the different mantras and since I have already been practicing this one for years I don't feel like changing now, but thanks anyway

I usually do about 5000 (more like 5000-10000)recitation of Amituofo a day