The Dao Bums
  • Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

About lifebythedrop

  • Rank
    Dao Bum
  1. Is it possible to change?

    I'm basically typing this to work it out in my own head, but i would love some advice......... I am a 26yo male and my girlfriend is only 20. I feel as though I am ready to settle down and be with one person. She claims to feel the same way and tells me she loves me and that she only wants me. She is very beautiful, and I think that has a lot to do with why i like her so much, but i also love her spirit and her personality and the way we interact day-to-day. The problem is that she is very lustful over other guys. She will tell me straight to my face that my friend is hot, for example. It makes it very hard for me to treat/trust her the way that I like to treat females. I find myself becoming jealous and insecure. Is it possible that she actually means what she says when she says she loves me, and that she just plain can't help her desires? She told me she has cheated in previous relationship by kissing other guys "but never sex." I'm not claiming to not know how she feels. It's natural, and she is young. I still think about other girls probably daily, but when i weigh the pro's and con's of lust and cheating i choose to stay faithful. I like to know that i will have someone to come home to every night, not just a random screw here and there. I personally have never slept with anybody else while in a relationship. I've been cheated on, hate the feeling, and wouldn't want to hurt someone like that. She told me she would cheat if she knew she wouldn't get in trouble... Selfish much?? Is it possible that this girl is the definition of evil, and that I am actually becoming more evil by enjoying the fruits of my own lust for her?? Is she a succubus? lol It seems like she wants more of an open sexual relationship while still being together, but I don't really see her being able to keep her heart out of said encounters like "swingers" do. I know i probably couldn't. Doesn't that undermine the very idea of being in a relationship with someone in the first place??? This relationship is pretty new. We broke up once and i don't even want to know how many people she slept with in that time. Is there some steps i can take to convince her that what she's doing is wrong and dangerous?? Also, why do i like this girl so much when it is so stressful to keep her in check? It shouldn't be this hard, right?? She was born in 1990. Thats probably the problem. LOL. She is kind of a tough egg to crack, and i think that is part of her appeal to me. I want to be the one that gets her to settle down. I get the feeling that this will all end on some shady stuff that she does. Should I just cut my losses now? I feel like if i do stay with her I won't be able to put my entire heart in it, and if I do I feel like I'm probably just setting myself up for disaster. I've never really been the player type. I just want to have a good relationship. I finally find someone who i can truely get along with most of the time, but there's this huge problem of her basically being uhm... loose(?) Help with any of these questions would be nice.
  2. hello

    i'm saying hello.