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About Integrated

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    Fighting demons in the abyss
  1. I'd say it depends on what the spiritual practice entails. Some mediation is almost like a break, some are more intensive. Doing it everyday is probably good, but how much time one can spare/stand, is both an individual thing, and also something that depends on what it entails. There are spiritual breaking points as well as bodily breaking points. What one identifies as those breaking points depends again on ones tradition and what one actually do. Yet spirituality and psychology are closely linked/intertwined, and hence if one is unbalanced in ones psyche, then one might not be able to stand much spiritual practice before "burning out". Whatever one does, one should test out ones stamina and adjust the level to that. Some things are better measured through repetitions, other by time, and maybe there are some other units that feels natural to you. Whatever one ends up doing, starting small and building is never wrong. Maybe just one repetition or one minute. If one cannot handle that, one should look oneself in the mirror and ponder deeply if that is a reflection on oneself or the practice. It is usually both, and often one has waded into more advanced stuff than one was ready for.
  2. Rank beginner: Tai Chi or Qigong?

    From my own personal experience, I've found that my Tai-Chi practice have taken care of my health better than any qi-gong ever did. Partly this is so, because Tai-Chi is more of a full package, while qi-gong is sort of a spread. Depending on the qi-gong system, you might get the equivalent of Tai-Chi or you may not. On the flipside, it is better to have some simple qi-gong you actually do, than a Tai-Chi practice that was too complicated, that you abandon. So yeah it depends a lot, so you need to use your own judgement about your situation and available resources.
  3. Responding to the main topic at hand, I'd say that any system will have it's basics. When you focus on the basics and eliminate the advanced stuff. You are usually left with simple A + B + C steps. The way I look at it, simple steps are mostly something that happen in your own head. You limit and label stuff in such a way that they to your level of insight take on a simplicity. That only happens when what is advanced to you disappear. You can only get rid of the advanced stuff, when you get real with yourself and accept where you are actually at.
  4. @liminal_luke Thanks, hehe, yeah I call myself that as an affirmation, as I know I have a shit-ton of stuff left to integrate. So I need to find some way of prioritizing what to deal with first. The more base and dirty something is, the better. After a bit of reflection I actually started with death. (Hard to get lower than that) In this day and age, figuring out why you actually want to live, is probably key. Cause when you meet nihilistic people who have great arguments for there being no point to anything, you better have figured out for yourself why there is still a point for you. Not that you need to tell them why you believe there is a point. You just dismiss them as irrelevant and move on, safe in your own reason to live. I could go on, but you see the point I hope. (Phun intended) As for people overreaching for the light. I've noticed in my own practice as I slowly build from bottom, how the cost of integrating higher stuff rises. It didn't take me too long to get through each of my "death-topics" as I was hardly suicidal. A couple of days at most for each, now however I'm starting to average a week on each topic. Cause the cost of integrating the higher levels is much more pricey. And I assure you, I'm still dealing with stuff that is pretty base, and "higher creatures of light" constantly try to save me. But since I know I will get up there eventually and probably at a much stabler manifestation than they had, I'm comfortable being told I have run astray and have lost the light. When I get to that level, each topic may well take me months, cause if nothing else when one gets higher, the problems one encounter starts to get more real. Sure I'm not suicidal, but I have many other vices that I'm now slowly having to face in a very uncomfortable way. Hence I often dissociate and think of something else in my meditations, defence mechanisms are a great way to know that one hasn't managed to own something. Denial, projection, etc etc are all great indicators that maybe one needs some more time to deal with a subject.
  5. I meditate every day, but I meditate on a topic. If I lose track on the topic, I have to keep meditating on it the next day. I will have to keep meditating on it until the topic resolves itself in my mind. I get a new topic when I grasp it fully and can keep focus until my stopwatch signal the end of the meditation. Clearing my mind of thoughts strike me as a futile excercise at this point in my journey. I have way too much content to deal with, better to deal with the content than to just clear the slate, cause clearing the slate consciously does not fix the unconscious baggage. Also I find a lot of people running for the light, like they think that if they just get closer to the light the shadow will resolve. Unforunately when you place yourself in front of a light, a shadow naturally arises. The only proper way to deal with a shadow is to accept that it is a natural consequence of the light. Then try to learn to deal with it, after all, there is shade from the light in the shadows. Shadow-work is hard, but totally worth it, when you integrate the "lower levels", nothing can really phase you all that much. Cause you have been down there under controlled circumstances several times. It is like exploring subterrainian caves, if the lights go out you don't panic like everyone else, cause you know your way around in the dark. Sure there is a lot to be found on the surface and up high in the clouds, but you often do not get to chose your starting location, nor what events gets thrown your way. By being a good grappler in martial arts, you don't have to worry about being pulled to the ground. You can then focus on standup fighting knowing that you can handle yourself if and when the fight gets a little dirty on the ground, you can even escalate it in that direction if it serves your purpose.
  6. Tarot as a Magical Tool?

    I personally don't like to think about tarot as a magical tool. I end up doing pretty much the same methods that magical oriented people do, but I classify it as a psychological tool. On the surface things seem mostly similar, but the subtle differences become bigger the deeper one goes. Not that one perspective/way is better than the other, just different paths with similar aims. Although with different trappings and different ways of looking at what is going on. I guess I'm too much of a materialist to be able to fully embrace it as magic. I have in the past delved into having a magical approach to the cards and elements. Burning spells, burrying them in the ground, scatter them in the wind and throwing them into bodies of water. At one level such actions are powerfully symbolic and does indeed have an impact on how one sees the issue. It is sort of like the extra work is a sacrifice to deepen the promise to oneself that the spell in many ways represent. In my view such symbols attach to the unconscious and drives one to syncronistically get to ones destination. It in many ways acknowledges the limits to our consciousness power. The ego does not like to be told it is not in charge, and sacrificing time, effort and material in a ritual, is a way to accept and submit to the inner forces that drives us, at least in the areas defined by the spell/promise.
  7. Correct use of Tarot

    It depends on the person really. If your psychic structure is constructed in a way that makes you need a group to orient you, then go join a formal group and get injected into a hierarchy where you can fight for position with others. Masochist and sadists alike have a lot of great opportunities for unfolding themselves there. Personally I don't operate well in hierarchies. So I keep on the fringes, always trying to spot traps that want to pull me into others sadistic structures. The bait is always alluring, but having access to the same material they pull upon to create those groups to begin with. I'm seldom impressed by their teachings, and find that the overhead of submitting, far outweighs the benefits. In fact all I need to do is triggers some of the higher members, and they will spill all the beans in defence of their little bubble of participation mystique. Beyond that, all that seperates someone good is practice...LOTS of practice.
  8. Meeting this new forum

    So I joined this here forum and I even found a tarot section haha So I decided to lay a spread on what this whole new experience meant to me so far. I'm using the Modern Spellcaster deck. 1. Core issue There is a lot of arguments and colliding opinion on my entry here. 2. Crossing factor This is somewhat at odds with my original purpose to learn more about Nei-Gong. Though I have made headway on that too. 3. Visible factor I seem to be caught within some very narrow reactionary dichotomies, where I operate out of an either or solution to certain situations. 4. Hidden factor I have strengthened my willpower and resolve considerably lately. 5. Past influence I've been plenty of dark places, and have taken plenty of deep journeys already. Always finding something new to be disillusioned about. 6. Future ideal My ideal for the future is pretty realistic, you win some you lose some. 7. Me as I see myself I'm driven by a wish to compete, to put my own take on things first and damn all the rest of the blind fools. 8. As others see me Others see me as a newbie with a lot to learn. 9. Solution Keep gathering resources and power, that is all that people respect in the end. 10. Result The end result will be that I will find a way to take part in this community. This paints an interesting picture on the last couple of days.
  9. Location of Heaven and Earth When Horizontal

    Heaven North and Earth South someone wrote in some book I read a long time ago. If their assertions are right, I do not know.
  10. I think Ken Wilber asserts that non-duality is consciously accessing the state of rem-sleep. Nothing in the world changes, it is just your perception of it. And apart from the impression it makes on your experience, you do not become radically changed by it. Just as sleep won't change you much, you wake up maybe in a better mood, but that is it. Your work, bills, friends and family will stay just the same when you "come back/wake up."
  11. Hey!

    Good! Cause you are a funny guy, I'd hate to lose out on some of your jokes.
  12. Middle Class Daoism : Bagua vs MMA

    Yeah, not all styles are infused with a klanish attitude just like a fotball team, but most people project that attitude onto martial arts in general from watching movies and the like. I'm a part-time freelancer, and have my skills marketable under the mask of "Tai-Chi". Recently one of my fellow "consultent" at this project I'm hired to do, learned that I taught it, he soon came back the next day talking about this fitness center that apparantly taught it. He wanted to compare my teaching to that, even though I told him nothing except the Tai-Chi name and that I'm very pricey. Part of the price is just to keep all the misinformed yahoo's that want to learn from exploiting me. I can teach, but only the very specially interested and dedicated. I actually am quite pleased that I can discourage customers with my price. Anyway the long and the short of it was that he was trying to convince me that since I had competition, my prices was not right... I took a look at their website, and they called it "Balanced Energy" and had some weird mix of yoga, tai-chi and pilates. It was dumbed down and made into a neatly packaged consumer product. No internal value, no martial value, just regular excercise. Hehe, I remember when I was about 21-22 and had a few years of Tai-Chi practice, plus a few other martial arts skills installed. I met a kickboxer, a former "stormtrooper" from the Army and what passes for a Hillbilly in my country. Each of them taught me in their own way that even though I did well in certain scenarios and my forms, when put to the mettle in wrestling with the big bulky army guy, sparring with kickboxing gloves, or the hillbilly being uncooperative just for the hell of it, my art mostly failed. A fight is always messy, so ones skills need to be extreme to be able to compansate for it. That being said, the rare occation I for example threw the bulky army guy effortlessly to the ground, the look on his face was priceless.
  13. Hey!

    Sure I understand, it will probably take me a little while to adjust to the atmosphere though. Might fill up my ignorelist a bit, with false positives, including the bad guys!
  14. Hey!

    Didn't have surplus to address you, but now that the loud voices have quieted down I may. Yes I have learned a few things about setting boundaries already in this forum. Nothing like being thrown out on the deep end from the start. Though nothing could have prepared me for having to ignorelist someone in my welcome thread. Most forums have a very different attitude about the newbie section. I went to the forum/tech section and lo and behold, there was no order there either. Although now I was more prepared mentally. Not that there is anything wrong with it, I'm just habituated to another forum that has a more active modding staff. It matters little, I'm well equiped to switch people who don't want to behave, I even enjoy it.
  15. General introduction

    Sounds nice, thank you!