Aetherous

Having an ego vs egolessness - I don't think these are concepts within TCM. Absence of an ego would probably be some sort of emotional disease, like "mania and withdrawal" (dian kuang), depending on how the person's symptoms presented. In Western psychiatry, I think it's considered "depersonalization disorder", a mental illness. A shen disturbance. So, we'd want to look at what's disturbing the shen...many things can do that. I don't think any TCM treatments would cause a person to lose their sense of self, such as getting rid of phlegm with shichangpu. Actually, doing such a thing might help a person's mind work more normally, and they could then develop a normally functioning ego. In that case, it would've been phlegm disturbing the shen, or "misting the mind", causing depersonalization. I think there might be a difference between Buddhist enlightenment, where a person is emotionally liberated from concepts of themselves... vs depersonalization disorder, which has got to be FAR more common. In terms of living in society unscathed, the liberated person should have no issue whatsoever, whereas the depersonalized person would experience their so-called egolessness as being highly traumatic.

It may have been caused by your own mind. You are already prone to nightmares (and this technique was said to increase dreams in general). So perhaps this is just another nightmare. The technique doesn't sound demonic in itself, although maybe best to stick with methods that bring good results. I would think real demonic experiences would happen more during a half awake or awake state of mind...not within the dream itself. Although, it could.

I've enjoyed watching his youtube videos. It brought me toward wanting to know more about Catholicism...although, researching further from other sources, I found myself not agreeing with many things about the sect.

That reminds me...I would like to prioritize the Christian teachings somewhat like this: 1) Jesus' words where multiple accounts are the same (because it's most likely to increase accuracy when more than one source claims he said or did something). 2) Jesus' words otherwise. Also, if he references the Old Testament, understanding the reference in context of both OT and NT. 3) Disciples' writings who lived with Jesus (because they were actually there with him and can have a better idea of what he meant, especially since they were told the meanings of the parables). 4) Apostle Paul's writings (because the disciples came to agree with him). 5) Early church fathers' writings (because they were the close to the source). 6) Anything else. I think doing this can paint a really different picture of what Christianity could be like. In the modern church, I believe we have the following prioritization: 1) Apostle Paul's writings (so we have the teachings of someone who never met Jesus while he was alive in the highest priority). 2) Anything else (this includes modern day books and preachers, who make things up half of the time). 3) Disciple's writings. 4) Jesus' words. 5) Early church fathers (it seems the ECF are really only focused on in Catholicism, and probably only read by scholars and priests, not the general public).

Sign me up for less advanced please.

Yep, that's how manipulation works...if you didn't feel and react the way you do, for instance compassionately and selflessly (feeling guilty or selfish), then you couldn't be manipulated. I think it's desirable to be natural and good, like you are...but at the same time, cultivating rationality (which you also are, by understanding clearly what's happening), and using both logic and heart to navigate through your path. Not good to be someone's doormat, which is always our choice...but good to take care of others, at the same time. Manipulators, or people who need help, don't make it easy to see the right steps to take...but perhaps if you wonder what the solution to this dilemma is, and continually calm your mind and let go of all thinking, the right path will present itself to your intuition.

Well, no wonder you feel stuck! To me it seems like you're being manipulated, and a healthier relationship would enable you to establish boundaries (rather than her threatening suicide if you attempt to), such as being able to go wherever you wanted for however long you wanted. You should know that you aren't responsible for appeasing her issues...they are hers.

I think online can be fine, so long as the teaching is good. It's not guaranteed that a good spiritual teacher will be in the closest city...we live in a good era, where we can research the best systems worldwide and then choose one.

Find a spiritual teacher, and try to attain the ultimate.

Sounds like you just need to figure out who you are, what you like and dislike, what you value in life, what you can never accept, etc. It helps if you don't live your life entirely for appeasing yourself, but look toward making the world a better place...think about others just as much as you think about yourself.

Beautiful.

You wouldn't be faulted for thinking that "life had turned against you" in those hard times. Anyway, I view the bolded part as simply a matter of semantics. To me, the essential meaning is the same between the two quotes. I don't actually view life as a being that acts upon me...to say "life has screwed with me" is truly just a manner of speaking, and saying that I've been through challenging situations. At least this is my understanding based on where I've been raised and how we use the language.

I think of it in terms of something I was taught, in an almost tantra context... There is clinging/grasping, and then there is openness. "Pain and misery oriented" reminded me of the clinging/grasping way of being. When we're enjoying things, we're open.

I think Chogyam Trungpa was considered many to be legitimate and a good source of info, while simultaneously not being good in some other ways. I think this particular quote is legitimate in terms of Tibetan Buddhist theories, but can see how it can be viewed in a satiating base desires context. Sometimes it's not good to "throw the baby out with the bathwater", and people who do bad things can have many good qualities. But also, other times you poison your water when using a dirty cup, and spiritual authority figures must be held to a high standard.

I never said that either. To restate what I said in the way that I actually meant it: "Try as hard as you might, but you can't escape challenging situations. They will happen." You misread my post...but looking back at it, I guess that's understandable given the way in which it was written. Perhaps if you reread it again, you can see my actual meaning now.

Maybe you should reread my posts with the understanding that we just said the same thing.

In a sense it really is true that awakening is harsh, if "awakening" refers to becoming aware of how the world should/could be, versus how it is. I think on the spiritual path we get an intuitive sense of how things should be...we are the progenitors of human evolution, and the better world comes first within us, then later on as there are more of us and our influence has spread, it arrives outside in the real world as well. If we're not careful, it can be very depressing to constantly be let down by the way of the world. Sometimes it's good to take a break from thinking about this stuff, from focusing on other people, and just concentrate on the simple pleasures in life. No use in feeling negative.

On second thought, not going to speak my mind.

You've got to be the luckiest person alive. Life has definitely screwed with me, big time.

In that there is real tragedy in life, and then there is being overly negative without good reason to be.

Hey now, don't call my intelligence artificial!

Sex trafficking of children is one example of something that makes the world incredibly messed up. It seems to me like only a monster would suggest to a victim of such things that suffering is just a product of the story they tell themselves. "There may be discomfort, there may be pain, but you're not really suffering, any suffering is just a product of your mind". Yeah right! There are many other things in the world which are incredibly messed up. Extreme poverty. Starvation. A class system which keeps certain people working in literal shit all day every day. Children trained to murder. Mind controlled people. Torture. Slavery. Prostitutes being pimped out. Spouses or children who watched their loved ones commit suicide in front of them. Spousal abuse. Children disappearing from the foster care system entirely. The list goes on, and all of these things are happening at this very moment you're reading this. There are literally thousands of people, at this very moment, experiencing each one of these things. But you say, "I don't think the world is so messed up" in the midst of that? The portion of the world in which people are mostly unaware of these things, where we live, is admittedly not so messed up, and our neuroses are definitely just a product of our concepts. But we fortunate ones represent a very small percentage of the total human population.

I guess because it was asking for one's personal opinion, that's legitimate. No need to get defensive here, though...my challenge that we expand our awareness outside of our subjective lens into the objective reality, in which most humans suffer immensely (and not just in their minds), wasn't intended to be something taken negatively. I didn't mean to single you out personally; it's just that your post was relevant to this.

I mean, there are also really bad things happening in the world, outside of our immediate perception, too. For most of us on the forum, life is relatively good. Not everyone has it so well, that they can say suffering is just due to perception.

The world is bad because that's what it does. Even if you set your situation up perfectly, let's say having the perfect wife and kids and being really wealthy and healthy...life will still find a way to throw a curveball at you at the worst possible time. For instance, your wife cheats on you; your kid dies; you get a terminal illness; you lose all your money, etc. Try as hard as you might to avoid it, you will still be screwed with. Some people think that living on earth is a "school" of training our spirits, and that life's "tests" are our way of learning. Perhaps higher more powerful spirits are like our administrators, ensuring that we're passing our classes. Who knows what's really true in that regard...that's just something people speak about. But it is true that life is hard, and the world is messed up. It is very messed up in some ways, and it's partly our responsibility to correct it, as impossible as that seems. At the same time, we can look at anything in an overly negative way, or an overly positive way. I'd say the OP is overly negative. There is a lot about life and the world that we can enjoy. If we didn't enjoy it, we wouldn't participate.