Listener

I believe I developed a Qi deviation in my heart area many years ago through haphazard energy practice. A few months ago after about twenty minutes of erotic visualization, I started to get some vibrations in my back that then moved to my chest. This felt terrible, like a rock in the center of my chest. Later on, unwisely thinking it would help me relax, I ejaculated. After that I had what I can only call an attack, with major pressure in chest, and vibrations, discomfort, and numbness throughout my body. I have been to the ER and had a doctor's visit and there are no indications of any heart issues, or any other issues. I am not doing any practices now, but several weeks ago I tried doing cloud hands, and that caused a major buildup of pressure in my chest. I have lost the the ability to have sexual sensation, pleasurable sensations of the skin, and worst of all, almost all emotion. Can someone explain what has happened to me, and what I need to do to be healed. Is there someone who can help me with in person, or distance healing? I have gone to an acupuncturist several times with limited benefit. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

I believe I have had jing qi stuck in the chest for some time. It seems that because of high stress, combined with energy being sent to the chest, I dysregulated my nervous system, and the B12 and some medications made it worse.

Thanks for your replies. There is more information I should have included in my original post. After the original incident in early October, I did have greatly reduced sexual sensation and premature ejaculation, but I did not have the other symptoms, or they were much less severe. One symptom I did have was numbness on my body, so I decided to start taking a lot of vitamin B12. I think that disturbed my sleep to where I first started taking melatonin. As the sleep worsened I started taking Trazodone, which I've used for over a month. Also, I took Zoloft for two days. My situation was already bad but these medications likely have made me much worse. I can stop the medication, but other than that I don't know what to do.

Yes I have asked for Divine help. I have also asked for many people to pray for me.

Unfortunately since this all began in early October, I am not able to connect to my heart in the way that I could before.

With only a small handful of exceptions, I have not been doing any intentional energy practice for years, only simple relaxation and stretching, however the blockage in my chest I developed years ago has remained. The visualization was not intended as an energy practice, but it became one by accident. When the energy that started in my back moved to my chest something terrible happened. Undoubtedly, I have very bad karma. I offer my sincere apologies to anyone I have ever offended in this or any past life. Believe me, I have felt very strong regrets over the last few months. I wish almost more than anything else that I could relive the past, and show true respect and appreciation to the many people who treated me with kindness and that I often treated with rudeness and taking them for granted. I am not a teenager. I wish I still was. I was a much better person then and much wiser in many ways. Or at least then I still had time to turn things around before I started making some truly serious mistakes. I have not seen a psychologist. I'm not in principle opposed to seeing one, but I don't think I would benefit much from that. I have had some problems in the past, but nothing like this. I don't know if anything I was doing back mostly in my twenties would qualify as neidan, but it could be intense, as was the recent visualization. I'm open to talking to a psychologist, certainly eating well and exercising, and getting my lie in order. If I am able to recover I don't intend to have any further involvement in energy work. Though as I said, the visualization was not intended as energy work. Unfortunately I do not think that will be enough. It has been three months since the attack and I have not improved. I have received two remote energy healings. One I felt nothing, the other I definitely felt something, though I don't think I felt any better. I need serious help to remove this blockage in my chest and to repair whatever other damage has occurred.