Dear forum members,
I´m need urgent help. My name is Margo, male 46. Something happened my kundalini. My story short, what happened: have practiced chakra meditaton with Om Swami since 2018. I reached to the Hearth chakra. This year I performed in ashram Nav Durga Tantra Sadhana and after that I did 40 days Ucchista Ganapati Sadhana. I felt very good, very good pure golden energy in me. Evening and night before 22.03 I slipped into immoral (porn) videos. 25.03. bad videos again. This destroyed my golden energy. Night before 09.04 I had terrible dream - I black hair beautiful girl died (commited suicide or fell down from cliff). I told to her to go to the edge of that cliff so her death was my fault. Probably Devi in me died. 11.04. My mind went crazy - when I saw another person I felt I am he. I like indiviudual person didnt excist anymore. I also saw that golden honey like energy that was in deep my second chakra was removed from me. All the sexuality was removed from me. 12.04. I felt better in the mind, I was again like individual person Margo. Some days ago started new problems: when I go to bed and try to sleep very intense colourful uncontrollable images start in my head. These images make sleeping impossible. I have to use strong sleeping pill to be able sleep. In the head there is strange "alien" energy, head is constantly heavy, daytime absence, memory and attention impairment,. Never before I had these problems. Sexuality still absolutely zero. Apparently something happened to the kundalini energy. Is there anyone who could help me? Thank you!
