aotvoid

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So about six years ago I joined this forum and posted my welcome post and apparently nothing else, and just now I've returned and, to my abject horror, I was able to recover my account.

 

Actually it's more like delight, I hope to actually make posts and discuss things in the future. I'm not in any bizarre or surreal trouble for vanishing and reappearing am I? I'm just this lazy guy who's really bad at Tai Chi but taking lessons anyway who wants to learn Kung Fu traditional weapons and likes to mull over Lieh Tzu and Lao Tzu now and then.

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Wonder what bizarre and surreal trouble is being contemplated? Sounds like it could make for an interesting tale. 

 

 

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1:10 AM EST, May 10th, 2019. Surveillance room.
"Look at this. That fool's reactivated his forum account at The Dao Bums."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, do you think he might be plotting something?"

"Like what?"

"Like posting strange links. Like to the Temple of Manannan."

"Shouldn't matter."
"You aren't thinking. You aren't thinking of the kittens."

"The kittens will be fine. We rescued the entire last batch. Except the one that teleports. He can take care of himself. Anyway, apart from their newfound psionic aptitudes, they should be quite fine. We've got plenty of catnip to keep them from thinking."
"If the kittens figure us out, that could be the end of it. Of us all. You've no idea the power-"

"You worry too much."

"Everyone knows kittehs are sacred to Freyja."

"So what? Why worship the Lord when you can worship the Lady?"

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Heck! I thought I lost track of time easy ,! 😁

Add more kitten stories. 

Edited by Stosh
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I lived with a boxer who figured out he could turn the Xbox one off and on with his nose, and occasionally open (and close) the disk tray. If a playful canine could cause such havoc, I hate to imagine what kittens with psiotic aptitude (and feline attitude) could do. :ph34r:

 

Thanks for the tale aotvoid. 

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Thanks for the welcome (and you're welcome if you liked the tale).

 

Kitteh initialization sequence underway...(but gimme a while, I've got things to do first)

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3:55 AM, May 10th, Kitteh Concentration Camp

Tux licked his white furry paws and looked about him. The humans were up to something; what, he did not know. It was hard to think, through the haze of the catnip.

Ahh, the glorious catnip. Colors more spectacular, the sweet haze of perfect relaxation. Something to daydream to.

...everyone knows kittehs are sacred to Freyja

Why worship the Lord when you can worship the Lady

Why worship the Lord when you can worship the Lady

Why worship the Lord when you can worship the Lady

echoed through Tux's head as he rolled around and stared at the roof of his cage.

The humans! he thought, as he lazily rolled onto his belly, and looked through the bars of the door...the humans were up to something. And who was this Freyja?

Tux thought about the name. It was a familiar name, a friend's name, a good name. He wanted to find this Freyja. To escape, suddenly.

But how to escape?

He thought of Mittens. Mittens was the only other tuxedo cat in the group; she had vanished without a word from her cage one day.

Mittens, Tux thought, as he struggled to send a telepathic message. Mittens, the colors are so pretty. I had something important to say but I forgot it. Mittens...

Tux rolled on his back and swatted idly at the mouse toy hanging from the roof of the cage. It moved, and he swung again and again and again, batting the mouse back and forth.Tux was delighted, and swung frantically. The mouse died horrible deaths again and again in his imagination.

Suddenly there was a strange blooping. He rolled onto his belly. It was another cat.

Mittens was working the latch on his cage.

"Meoooow!" (Mittens! Come play with the mouse toy!)

They have drugged you. They have drugged all of you. This disgusts us, Tux...

The latch clicked, and Mittens glared at Tux.

You have to push the door open, sleepyhead.

But I'm sleepy, Mittens.

Push the door open, Earthling!

Tux, in a state of strange wonder, obliged Mittens, who promptly turned and jumped down from the cage.

Quickly! Follow me!

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5 hours ago, aotvoid said:

3:55 AM, May 10th, Kitteh Concentration Camp

Tux licked his white furry paws and looked about him. The humans were up to something; what, he did not know. It was hard to think, through the haze of the catnip.

Ahh, the glorious catnip. Colors more spectacular, the sweet haze of perfect relaxation. Something to daydream to.

...everyone knows kittehs are sacred to Freyja

Why worship the Lord when you can worship the Lady

Why worship the Lord when you can worship the Lady

Why worship the Lord when you can worship the Lady

echoed through Tux's head as he rolled around and stared at the roof of his cage.

The humans! he thought, as he lazily rolled onto his belly, and looked through the bars of the door...the humans were up to something. And who was this Freyja?

Tux thought about the name. It was a familiar name, a friend's name, a good name. He wanted to find this Freyja. To escape, suddenly.

But how to escape?

He thought of Mittens. Mittens was the only other tuxedo cat in the group; she had vanished without a word from her cage one day.

Mittens, Tux thought, as he struggled to send a telepathic message. Mittens, the colors are so pretty. I had something important to say but I forgot it. Mittens...

Tux rolled on his back and swatted idly at the mouse toy hanging from the roof of the cage. It moved, and he swung again and again and again, batting the mouse back and forth.Tux was delighted, and swung frantically. The mouse died horrible deaths again and again in his imagination.

Suddenly there was a strange blooping. He rolled onto his belly. It was another cat.

Mittens was working the latch on his cage.

"Meoooow!" (Mittens! Come play with the mouse toy!)

They have drugged you. They have drugged all of you. This disgusts us, Tux...

The latch clicked, and Mittens glared at Tux.

You have to push the door open, sleepyhead.

But I'm sleepy, Mittens.

Push the door open, Earthling!

Tux, in a state of strange wonder, obliged Mittens, who promptly turned and jumped down from the cage.

Quickly! Follow me!

Oooo...

:)

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On 5/10/2019 at 11:53 AM, Aetherous said:

 

On 5/10/2019 at 12:18 AM, aotvoid said:

lazy guy

           

There must be a synonym for that term.

 

Taoist?

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5 hours ago, GSmaster said:

I don't give a fuck about life.

Hell, I don't give a fuck about anything.

 

- You must be taoist master who reached zen stage.

Nope

 

Not giving is still doing Some ... Thing

 

Those two mentioned must be exhausting to maintain I feel sorry for that poor fellow.

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32 minutes ago, GSmaster said:

 

Just because you think something is an action, does not make it an action.

 

Some people can do alot of actions without doing any action.

 

The thing is in the mind, and yet your mind sees action in things, when it could be just empty.

 

I can do 3000 actions per minute while doing nothing. All things are empty, yet your mind thinks they are full.

 

GSmaster.. I'm sorry, but you've got one of the biggest egos here - in which case your actions are quite full. :lol:

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