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Earl Grey

A master once told me about fighting

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A master once told me, “You don't avoid shit [fighting and conflict] because you are a coward. You avoid shit to avoid getting dirty.”

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I avoid it because I'm lazy. More energy is used in the clean-up  than is expended in the fight.

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Here is what mine told me ; only 3 reasons to do it;

 

1) to defend parents.

2) to defend family and home.

3) to defend self , so you can do 1and 2..

 

and 3 levels of fighting

1)  so as not to be embarrassed when your friends push you around - holding your own . a very soft type, with lots of 'tricks' ;  grip and hold escapes and reverses, etc .

 

2)  for personal self defence, trying only to use 'necessary force' .

 

3 ) The  serious stuff , nasty maim and permanent injury , in the case of a home invasion / violent  actions against of your family ,  crazed amped up people on drugs etc .

 

 

''oh yeah .... ad if you dont bow deep enough  to me .

 

 

( Okay ... I threw that last one in myself :)    )

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Very good !  3rd principle  -  'no mind'       ;) 

 

 

 

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As I get older, I am just getting better and better with the 4th principle  ;  ' Keep weight underside '    :) 

 

 

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:D   Nah !  I ain't  that  bad ... yet .

 

Edited by Nungali
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I can tell you the last time I thought about fighting. It was this past January, I was on the train in the city, and a large homeless woman was trying to pick fights with random people on the train, swearing at them and punching the windows. I felt empathy for her, obviously stricken with mental disabilities... but also thought about having to defend myself and my girlfriend. They stopped the train and let everyone off, so nothing happened, except a minor altercation with another passenger. 

 

Luckily my life is pretty relaxed, and I don’t find myself in such situations often.  So no need to think about fighting 😊

 

 

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Like I once wrote about power, there are those with experience fighting who say it never brought them happiness, such as soldiers. Then there are those who shit on IMAs because they do MMA and think Tai Chi is weak and their counterparts who come in two variations: 1) those who can’t fight and spout platitudes about not needing to fight, or 2) those who know how much they can destroy and are avoiding trouble and harm for everyone.

 

Those who know how to fight wouldn’t even bother sharing they have any experience as all of my teachers downplay their skill to non students and focus on being healers. Those in training talk about it because it’s exciting like my own students and I do because it is a battlefield beyond fists and guns. Those that obsess with it like an MMA host I know may recognize it within the safety of a sport but have never fought outside where a life was threatened.

 

I met a boy who at the age of 41 considers himself a dragon because he has a bluebelt in BJJ and fought in One Championship. He calls all IMA only about training the mind but can’t defeat grapplers. But when I asked if he’d ever helped anyone in need when he boasted about his skill and expertise, he never had an altercation and became very surprised when he found that my students fight in a different battlefield: abusive parents and relationships, bullies at school and work, and shanty towns.

 

To disarm an opponent by punches and kicks would invite retaliation by the gangs or further beatings or an abusive parent who takes out her anger on the dogs when she can no longer hurt her child who fights back. To disarm them using all tools of the Tao until physical altercation is the only method available to prevent harm to anyone is worth getting dirty over because dust can be washed off, but blood on your hands for allowing harm to those who are unable to help themselves stays with you forever.

 

I teach reluctant warriors because I am one myself and strive to be what my teachers say is the higher level: a healer who heals without even trying.

Edited by Earl Grey
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