Taoway

healthy sexuality?

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I wish I could experiment but I can't even hold a conversation with most women. Im either drawing for countless hours or listening to talks at the same time about eastern religion. I get weird looks for talking about this stuff. It feels very hard to find a women who genuinely has interest in these things. And not just a tattoo of an om symbol to look spiritual.

 

Your description of your many partners and how yoh wish you had less makes me just not want to even get invovled. Whats the point? If someone perfect comes along ill know it. But that rarely happens. And its just as rare that a girl will give me the time of day and also be interested in the ssme things.

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I think being able to have those deep conversations are important, but so is small talk and simply having fun. Its kind of like finding the joyous, "inside joke", type of connection intrinsic with each persons energy that you meet. One of my favourite things about spending time with another person, is making them smile and laugh :)  
 
A perfect woman is very rare, and arguably non-existant albeit in a subjective manner, but I will tell you that as you grow and align closer and closer to the core of your truest self, and working towards and doing the things that make you happy in life, attracting a "perfect" woman becomes increasingly more plausible.
 
I think that when you say, "whats the point?", you are exibiting the same attitude as a male version of the crazy cat lady. Whats the point of anything? We might as well live in a box...   a dark box with nothing in it. And when you say that, "its just as rare that a girl will give me the time of day", you are telling the universe that you arn't good enough for when someone awesome comes a long. If you find it rare that someone is, "interested in the same things", when someone does come a long and you have this attitude you are going to repel them and then you will have to wait another 1000 years, or perhaps in this incarnation you can work out and resolve the karma. Im going to be 100% honest here, and say you that you have a bad attitude with what you said, and if I were a perfect woman, I would be totally turned off.  
 
The information is there to be able to do what you want to do, and to be able to attract and keep a high quality woman with similar interests in your life. Those videos... Coach Corey Wayne. Excellent stuff. Give it a chance, or even better yet, make a commitment to growing and overcoming your fears and dive into this information 100%. It doesn't necessarily mean having sex with a whole bunch of women. I think its more about being comfortable talking to women, being confident in yourself, and knowing that you could have many women, but choosing to be with one that you really connect with!

We dont let brothers give up! Open yourself to the possibilities, dont hide away because you are afraid!  Baby steps is all it takes! This is life, its meant to be lived! The Tao is open.

Edited by CodyWizard
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Well the type of women or men that are addicted to sex are usually using sex to band-aid their emotional damage, like any addiction. There are also people who completely cut off sex from their lives because of emotional damage. There are so many reasons. As Des mentioned:

 

By definition, if someone is addicted to sex then there is some sort of emotional problem or dysfunction. But you can´t (or shouldn´t anyway) infer an addiction just because someone has a lot of sex, or multiple partners, or whatever. It´s more complicated than that. Some sexually compulsive people have lots of sex, others have very little. Some people whose sexuality is more healthy have lots of sex, some have very little.

 

Liminal

Edited by liminal_luke
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By definition, if someone is addicted to sex then there is some sort of emotional problem or dysfunction. But you can´t (or shouldn´t anyway) infer an addiction just because someone has a lot of sex, or multiple partners, or whatever. It´s more complicated than that. Some sexually compulsive people have lots of sex, others have very little. Some people whose sexuality is more healthy have lots of sex, some have very little.

 

Liminal

 

I wasn't inferring that.

Edited by CodyWizard

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On 01.12.2015 at 8:48 PM, Taoway said:

Because many in the west with its hypersexualization and porn tend to neglect the other simple beauties in life and lack sensitivity to these things because their brains have been so triggered by intensely stimulating imagerin pornographic videos billboards advertisement movies.. people on the street.

Yes, It is.
This is a serious obstacle to normal relations between a man and a woman.
Now many people do not look at the soul of another person, in the first place for them is sexuality.
Many women dress and behave in such a way that the first thing a man sees is their body (and vice versa).
I would like that in a society there was more modesty in behavior and in appearance that it was possible to see someone first of all as the person, instead of simply as the body.

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On 11/15/2015 at 11:57 AM, Taoway said:

I agree that a healthy sex drive is natural and healthy. But I am very confused personally what a healthy sex drive is for me?

 

Hi Taoway,

 

It is now more than two years on since you started this thread on 15 November 2015.

Have you found an answer to your question?

 

- LimA

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5 hours ago, Limahong said:

Have you found an answer to your question?

 

Hi Taoway,

 

I am not trying to be cheeky.

Will there be 'acceptable' answer(s) to your topic question - 'healthy sexuality?'

 

- LimA

Edited by Limahong
Enhance ...

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20 hours ago, Limahong said:

 

Hi Taoway,

 

It is now more than two years on since you started this thread on 15 November 2015.

Have you found an answer to your question?

 

- LimA

Hi lima. 

 

It has been two years. All I can say is I feel a bit less frustration with dealing with it.  I'm putting the energy that arises into a career and creative pursuits. 

 

I asked the question because I was conflicted.  I really want to cultivate but always had this intense sexual desire that always seemed to drain me.  And I can only rarely find a partner that I feel comfortable with. So I spend most of my time single with out any sexual outlet.  

 

I am now turning that energy around and focusing on self actualization. Growing in mind and body  strength. 

 

I'm currently quite heart broken over the last partner I Had trying to let go of them  and not feel jealousy for what they're involved in now. So this suffering has lowered My libido.

 

I'm going to keep listening to that energy and pain and see what I have to do to change for the better.  I know sexuality is natural but I feel like I grew up hyper sexual. And it never did me any good. I wasted alot of time fantazising ano chasing girls who didn't want me.  So I think for the the first time in my life I'm going to try and abstain from seeking out women. And see if I can put my entire focus on improvement.

 

I also noticed that my hypersexuality. Has made me very shy and nervous around women all my life. If I let go of the sexuality and seek platonic relationships for a while I think I might benefit from it. 

 

I'm sorry for such a long response. This is just where im.at today. 

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An unsolicited idea...but perhaps it's best to just really pay attention to the times when someone is interested in you, and seek them out, rather than others who don't display any interest. Makes dating a lot easier!

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5 hours ago, Aetherous said:

An unsolicited idea...but perhaps it's best to just really pay attention to the times when someone is interested in you, and seek them out, rather than others who don't display any interest. Makes dating a lot easier!

That is a good idea.  I don't really chase those who don't care much for me though. 

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9 hours ago, Taoway said:

It has been two years. All I can say is I feel a bit less frustration with dealing with it.

 

Good morning Taoway,

 

Good for you. There is a good differential between 'then' and 'now' - more than two years on. Why good differential? Because -

 

9 hours ago, Taoway said:

I'm putting the energy that arises into a career and creative pursuits. 

 

9 hours ago, Taoway said:

I am now turning that energy around and focusing on self actualization. Growing in mind and body  strength.

 

9 hours ago, Taoway said:

I'm going to keep listening to that energy and pain and see what I have to do to change for the better. 

 

9 hours ago, Taoway said:

So I think for the the first time in my life I'm going to try and abstain from seeking out women. And see if I can put my entire focus on improvement.

 

1 hour ago, Taoway said:

That is a good idea.  I don't really chase those who don't care much for me though.

 

You have good respondents to your thread; amongst them a  fair lady - a credit to sisterhood.

 

Have noticed that you still have in mind your hyper sexuality. It is a blessing (to me at least) to be hyper sexual but you must handle this blessing creatively like a fine gentleman. Otherwise you will surely expire through hyper ventilation.

 

For your impressive advancement you deserve something great. Can I suggest something? OK? Sure? If OK - for the rest of 2017 conquer like a super-duper-hyper sexual athlete.

 

And when 2018 comes, be a super sensitive human being.

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

 

- LimA

Edited by Limahong
Enhance ...

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