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Perspectives on Narcissism

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I do think it´s possible to change and grow. However, the more narcissistic a person is the less likely they are to acknowledge they have a problem.

 

Liminal

Edited by liminal_luke
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Probably a cause of being split into mind and body which results in confusion, despair and so on.

 

Takes some time to unwind that into wholeness when dropping down into your body and letting go of the ego control.

 

Any sort of suppression won't work because suppression is one of the causes.

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I think Jyotis can help them and their families in their situation, a lot better than occidental psychiatry; with no comparison.
It is not an illness, it is a repetitive cyclic manifestation of karma that is badly misguided, that needs to be redirected.

Else rinse and repeat ad infinitum.

Mantra is an excellent place to start. With knowledge of the self people change; I mean of the Self, not of them self.

To my mind, It is occidental lack of awareness of the nature of self, that essentially creates the problem. Combined with a social structure that reflects the same.

Edited by iain
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I think self-hatred is probably one of the causes of narcissism

 

This is what I've always thought. Narcissism is like a defense mechanism.

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We're all quite narcissistic, if we weren't, we wouldn't pick clothes or have a hairstyle. Just how much narcissism is probably the main concern.

 

I'm a musician and actor...very tough to get anywhere without a social media - the lord of narcissism!

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That or I've turned into a psychedelic beach towel. On the internet, nobody knows you're a beach towel.

Blown your cover there friend!

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What do you mean by narcissism? There is nothing wrong with having a high opinion of yourself relative to others. There is a wide range of ability, skill, and value among different people, and some are simply better than others. If you are one of these people, being a narcissist is simply a valid expression of a fact.

 

On the other hand, people who constantly compare themselves to others and try to exaggerate themselves while putting others down usually do so out of some kind of insecurity. Those who are really superior do not give a shit about what others do or think, and has no need for any validation.

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What do you mean by narcissism? There is nothing wrong with having a high opinion of yourself relative to others. There is a wide range of ability, skill, and value among different people, and some are simply better than others. If you are one of these people, being a narcissist is simply a valid expression of a fact.

 

On the other hand, people who constantly compare themselves to others and try to exaggerate themselves while putting others down usually do so out of some kind of insecurity. Those who are really superior do not give a shit about what others do or think, and has no need for any validation.

Having a healthy self-image is not narcissism.

 

Narcissists craves attention because they are extremely volatile, insecure and self-centred. On the other hand, a confident, secure individual (with substance) deflects volatility & self-centredness by virtue of the fact that they have no desire for validation of any sort. This is why sometimes others will bestow on such individuals a label like 'charismatic', befitting their air of likability and presence. Its never a self-awarded thing, these labels.

 

Those who are really superior are those who truly wish others to be their equal.

 

I think you have it slightly mixed up.

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What is your guys' take on narcissism? A biological or human character flaw? Can it be cured, at least from a spiritual point of view (provided the person has the desire to change)? Any other thoughts, opinions, welcome.

Its a stage of growth all humans go through. When you are a baby or a young child you literally believe you are the centre of the universe, when you are hungry you get fed, when you cry you get comforted, other peoples needs are of no concern. If there is a trauma or that stage of growth is either denied (through neglect) or indulged (by spoiling them) by your carers then growth can be arrested at that stage so it continues to be a feature of adult life until healed or grown out of. So adult narcissists are still children on the emotional level.

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At the opposite end of Narcissism one finds this:

 

 

Sophrosyne is a term for the spirit of moderation, self-control, temperance, restraint, and discretion. Latin equivalents are continentia (continence and moderation), and sobrietas, (temperance and sobriety).[1]

 

Many Ancient Greeks upheld the ideal of sophrosyne, which is often translated by such terms as prudence, self-control, moderation, and temperance; but ultimately its complex meaning, so important to the ancients, is very difficult to convey in English. It is perhaps to some extent expressed by the two most famous sayings of theOracle of Delphi: "Nothing in excess" and "Know thyself."[2]

 

Socrates, a Greek philosopher, believed that the quest for self-knowledge was to be honored more than the attainment of wealth or material goods and that the most valuable of one’s possessions were virtues. The term suggests that lifelong happiness may be obtained when one's mental needs are satisfied, and it resembles the idea of enlightenment through harmonious living. It is a nearly lost Classical ideal, but the goal of living within the limits of reason and nature through practical wisdom and self-knowledge is enjoying a revival today.[according to whom?] Parallels abound in Eastern thought, in Hinduism, Buddhism and Taoism. The Analects of Confucius, for example, has several passages on humility that resemble discussions of the Greek ideal.

 

The word is found in the writings of Ancient Greece, especially those of Plato: in ethical discussions of the dialogue Charmides where it refers to the avoidance of excess in daily life, and in the Republic. This term in Plato's use is connected with the Pythagorean idea of harmonia.

wiki

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More on this since I had a breakthrough recently.

 

If there is some sort of trauma in your childhood then this trauma will result in a formation of thought patterns that get played out in the head repeatedly.

 

Some function in the brain seems to take these thoughts seriously and this is where a self image pops up which is skewed - when compared to reality.

 

This can be very tough to break out from because of how the brain operates since it believes so much in this self image.

 

Only when the trauma gets healed will those thought patterns disappear and you can see clearer.

 

And this process goes on since there is always some level of blindness.

 

I used to believe in the process of mechanically working on myself and doing this or that kind of exercise. However any mechanical view of life is also a result of trauma - life is actually more much alive so life itself will provide the tools you need when you need them. This is the beauty of it.

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Those who are really superior are those who truly wish others to be their equal.

 

?????? Its always those at the bottom who wish for equality, and they do it by trying to drag down those who are better than them through agitation, riots, and revolution.

Edited by mike 134

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Sigh ...

 

Humility, might also be considered and option, in a sane environment.

 

This all sounds all so ... Occidental.

 

While I am on the case; music and other performance art have absolutely no place being correlated with narcissism; other than in an insaine society that is totally debased; This would undoubtedly bring about a significant drop in the quality of all the arts.

Social entropy any one?

This is of course of no issue at all, if the populous are to busy admiring their selfies to notice any relative change in the quality of anything produced.

 

Bring on the revolt; I am disgusted.

 

Oh hello mike 134, are you considering your self better than others by your stance; ... Feeling entitled perhaps?

Edited by iain

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My wife was raised by narcissists. These fuckers are no joke and do massive damage to those around them.

Their knee-jerk response was to abuse her mentally, physically and emotionally whenever she interfered with their desires. The worst part for me is the unconscious aspect of it. Projecting all of the problems and sources of discomfort outward onto those around them. Narc's are to be pitied and avoided in my world for now.

 

Healthy distance. And sometimes a restraining order...

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?????? Its always those at the bottom who wish for equality, and they do it by trying to drag down those who are better than them through agitation, riots, and revolution.

That may be true in dysfunctional minds. In healthy individuals your assumptions do not apply.

 

Just reflect for a moment whether its more effective for personal goal achievement when others are respected as equals or otherwise. I have found the former works wonders in a work environment, but its not a prevalent scenario out there, unfortunately. This would explain your stance, one which, if not altered, serves only one predictable outcome.

Edited by C T

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.

 

I used to believe in the process of mechanically working on myself and doing this or that kind of exercise. However any mechanical view of life is also a result of trauma - life is actually more much alive so life itself will provide the tools you need when you need them. This is the beauty of it.

 

 

This is beautiful.

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Just reflect for a moment whether its more effective for personal goal achievement when others are respected as equals or otherwise. I have found the former works wonders in a work environment, but its not a prevalent scenario out there, unfortunately. This would explain your stance, one which, if not altered, serves only one predictable outcome.

 

Depends on the work environment and position. If you are the supervisor you'd want your employees to be on the same level, as long as they are below you. When one guy comes in and does better than others the rest immediately become jealous and resentful. Even the supervisor may feel threatened. Its just human nature, and admittedly it really isn't conducive to a positive work environment. But when you are in the same position as others, and the competition is cutthroat, you'd want every possible advantage. The trick is to avoid looking like a douche (or a narcissist) while doing it.

 

I've found IRL that some of the most helpful, kind, and even self depreciating people act that way entirely out of self interest. They are merely trying to increase their popularity and influence, and expand their social network. I'm always on my guard against these types.

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Depends on the work environment and position. If you are the supervisor you'd want your employees to be on the same level, as long as they are below you. When one guy comes in and does better than others the rest immediately become jealous and resentful. Even the supervisor may feel threatened. Its just human nature, and admittedly it really isn't conducive to a positive work environment. But when you are in the same position as others, and the competition is cutthroat, you'd want every possible advantage. The trick is to avoid looking like a douche (or a narcissist) while doing it.

 

I've found IRL that some of the most helpful, kind, and even self depreciating people act that way entirely out of self interest. They are merely trying to increase their popularity and influence, and expand their social network. I'm always on my guard against these types.

I've held supervisory roles for more than 20 years and I have never had that attitude. Don't remember ever seeing it in other supervisors, either -- neither my peers nor my supervisors.

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