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CrunchyChocolate555

Pain when expressing love

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Can anyone relate to this? I have a stumbling block in my heart chakra. I have a yearning to open up, to connect, to love, but every time I try to make a sincere effort, I am pushed back with a feeling of hurt and pain. Literally, I will be talking to somebody and want to make a compliment but I will be stopped by this painful churning feeling in my chest and solar plexus. Even more fucked up, I gave one of my best friends a hug the other day, and was struck with such painful grief that I almost wanted to cry. My inability to love then gives others the impression that I am cold, ungrateful, and arrogant when in reality, I am everything but. What do I do??!!

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Hi ChrunchyChocolate555,

 

My first thought: It hurts to give others what we ourselves have not been given.

 

What to do? I'd play with the edge. You say you yearn to open up, connect, love--so do that! And then notice what happens, what comes up for you. The trick, I think, is to do it in a really super small way so it doesn't overwhelm you. If hugging your friends brings up too much pain, how about giving a quick pat on the back? If giving a quick pat on the back brings up too much pain, how about just imagining doing so? What you want is to feel the pain just enough so you can look and see what it really is. If you don't feel the pain you won't grow. If you feel too much pain you'll just get discouraged and retract into your shell. Find this middle ground where you're in touch with yourself and still relatively comfortable. Then make being open/connected/loving in a way that puts you in this zone a daily practice. Notice what happens.

 

Two cents,

 

Liminal

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Earth element imbalance: I couldn't take it anymore. Being that I knew the root of this issue, I just mustered up the heart (and the courage) to have a heart-to-heart talk with my mom for the 1st time in 15 years, and told her everything I felt.

 

Welp, that was just amazing, and so worth it. And thanks for the advice liminal :)

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Earth element imbalance: I couldn't take it anymore. Being that I knew the root of this issue, I just mustered up the heart (and the courage) to have a heart-to-heart talk with my mom for the 1st time in 15 years, and told her everything I felt.

 

Welp, that was just amazing, and so worth it. And thanks for the advice liminal :)

We all have our own answers. Just takes another person to get them out of ourselves sometimes!

 

Good going!

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