Hello People

[Josama]

Hi I am from Luxembourg and 21 years old. I just got recently into meditation(about 6 months) after having gone through two years of drug abuse.First I started normal chakra meditation mainly on the 3 eye and was even able to open it but I think that was mainly due to the antidrepessants I was still taking at the time.However since then(3 months ago) nothing has been like before again,although I was able to close my 3 eye again I have thrown my body into a major chakra imbalance I can't seem to recover from,all the time I see one type of aura,the one that is like fog,that people spread into the air and now I feel when a spirit is in my room and I see slight contures although that I find is the least troublesome.When I watch inside me it's like I don't seem to have any root chakra anymore,where before it was about 5 cm,now it's only about like a finger width.

When I talk to people I have problems looking people into the eye cause a dark side of me wants to attack the person I am talking with I know it's simply a protection but it ruins my social life.Okay so 3 months ago after learning of the MCO and practicing a little I noticed that this makes it worse and about at the same time I found B.K Frantzis Water Method which actually helps a little.And one time even I was able to sink one from blockage at heart level and for a few seconds I was normal again but the blockage returned right away and so I thought there is perhaps a blockage above which keeps it from sinking and so I tried sinking the big one in my throat but then I would feel the inside of my head go soft also and I would get angry like never before(I am never angry altough I was as kid) and so I decided to let the throat be for the moment.Since I just stopped my 10 years of smoking I figured that that would already have it's own purpose.

One time I felt heat at the back of my head and even vibrations that was when I was still doing the MCO altough I didn't concentrate there.Then having read about Kunlun on here I decided to add it to my daily practice(2 weeks ago) and since doing so my Killer Intent seems to have lessened,it doesn't pop up quite as often anymore.I also started noticing vibrations in my sacral,solar plexus and heart chakra,altough I think that is normal?And quite often I will feel my crown getting watery that feels rater bizarre.

Please if anyone knows how I can rebalance myself(and no chakra balancing sounds don't help nor does grounding) and I am doing sports everyday I already stopped meditation and only focused on sport but it got a little worse since I lost the mental clarity I get through it.

I am sorry if it's a written in a chaotic sense since am in imbalance I have memory problems I really can't seem to remember things all to well anymore,the memories came along when I started writing but I lost my ability to remember in one picture which always got me full points on free writing and I lost some of my visual imagination altough I found that is only the case with eyes closed.

[RiverSnake]

Sounds like you could really use a teacher whom can guide...guessing with this stuff can be dangerous.

 

I would put this post in Taoist Discussion and then ask the universe to send a teacher who is perfect for you to come into your life.

Edited July 15, 2011 by OldGreen