73543_1494798777

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Everything posted by 73543_1494798777

  1. Is this pure yang?

    When looking at sunshine, I see that I am able to perceive it as brighter or less bright. Just by intending to perceive light being brighter, it actually happens. Could this be pure yang? It interests me because it seems to be like a spectrum. You can go from dimmer to brighter and it just keeps going as you raise your vibration more and more to the level of light shinning.There is a sense of dryness, warmth, and fullness which I haven't experienced with normal awareness techniques. To me, the feeling of increasing the brightness of your vision seems totally in a different direction than the feelings of increased clarity, peace, or depth that come with awareness. These feelings in a way seem opposite. I wonder if this is what pure yang and pure yin might be pointing towards?
  2. Great paragraph

    Translated by Fabrizio Pregadio in the book Cultivating the Tao, Taoism and Internal Alchemy by Liu Yiming I love this quote. I find it very helpful.
  3. Seeing, the same as knowing...

    I feel that I have a psychological/psychic/energetic distortion or blockage dealing with my eyes and sight and vision in general. It seems to me that what I see must be identical to what everyone else sees. But is this true? When meditating, I try to clear my awareness to remove all noise and disturbances. I reach a point where empty space develops. It seems 100% obvious and plain that what I am seeing is devoid of anything that I have added. I feel that this is the clearest that anything could be. But I am beginning to think that maybe what I see is still distorted, though perhaps almost on a physical level. If you can distort your senses through physical means, how can you tell the way a thing really is? I think the answer must be that you really cannot know for sure the way a thing really is, but it seems very strange to me. Anybody have any comments on this?
  4. Seeing, the same as knowing...

    I feel the question is similar to asking, "Does the world exist outside of your awareness of it?". Of course everybody will say yes, the world exists outside of them. But do you actually feel this on a sensational level? If you close your eyes can you know the existance of the world beyond the range of your eyesight? Or is it just a thought. To me it seems just a thought...
  5. Going deeper and deeper I find that many things he writes about are meant literally. The main themes he writes about: 1.) You are not your mind - You are not the voice in your head, but the awareness of that voice -Most people on here are probably quite aware of this. But it radically changed my world. By just "watching" your thoughts it seems to cause Qi to arise in your head. It gives you space around the thoughts and they decrease in their ability to affect you. 2.) The "Painbody" is an energetic entity which lives inside you and occasionally rises up and becomes you -This is crazy. Contracted life energy bundles together and becomes semi-autonomous through compulsive thinking. It exists in a personal and collective form. All personal "painbodies" if you trace them back lead to a collective form.. which is one SCARY MOFO! Ive experienced it with a bunch of people at work and we were all scared shitless. Such a deep deep feeling of dread and pain. Tolle says its ultimately an illusion. Ive seen that it is dissolvable. 3.) The "Now" is all that there is - time is an illusion -Ive had glimpses. But it is difficult to reside in this state of realization. It is easy to get drawn into reactive mind patterns which block this. Not trying to push this guy. But it helped me. The whole message is basically: Say YES to the present moment, REGARDLESS of what it contains. Anytime you say No, youve f#$*ed up and psychically polluted the planet a bit more. Always say yes to the pain. Incredible what that does.
  6. Self-consciousness / Egoic-awareness

    I feel that I am caught in an awareness bubble. I believe there is a definite distinction between awareness and egoic-awareness or self-consciousness. I am very aware of myself as the awareness of my thoughts, emotions, bodily posture... but I am not free! I do not feel free to join with my emotions, or thoughts, to experience them fully. Although I am highly aware of what I experience, my awareness is somehow divided, or trapped. I feel unable to ever fully give my attention to the external world... some part of my attention is always kept inwardly pointing, maintaining some mental sense of self. Energetically speaking I have found that my energy breaks right at the brow above the eyes and turns inward, twisting downward around my face and into my lower body. It almost feels that I am always looking inward with my eyes while pretending to look outward. Or that what I see is a bent version of what is actually out there. I have practiced a certain breathing technique where I breathe directly into my eyes and it initially had shocking effects, as it seemed to dissolve whatever energetic twists occur there. But the energetic structures feel very resistant and the technique is less effective now than it used to be. Does anybody know of good material relating to being able to really forget oneself, or dissolve self-conscioussnes, or about the difference between egoic awareness and awareness? It really is a tremendous relief to be able to give attention FULLY to the external world and not have to retain some on oneself. I believe it has to do with grounding oneself in the physical body as well... To be able to choose to be purely physical, to not have any attention mingling with your body at all, to leave it completely alone... Any suggestions are appreciated
  7. Blockages between the Third Eye point and the Throat point

    It may sound strange, but try eating something passionately. Really try to focus on the taste of the food as it makes contact with the top of your mouth. Ive been working on blockages in this area too and to tell the honest truth, drinking some really good thick milkshakes has helped me "break through" a couple of times.
  8. Some spiritual teachers suggest that you should be in a state of permanent connectedness with your inner body at all times... “The key is to be in a state of permanent connectedness with your inner body-to feel it at all times. This will rapidly deepen and transform your life. The more consciousness you direct into the inner body, the higher its vibrational frequency becomes, much like a light that grows brighter as you turn up the dimmer switch and so increase the flow of electricity. At this higher energy level, negativity cannot affect you anymore, and you tend to attract new circumstances that reflect your higher frequency.” “If you keep your attention on the body as much as possible, you will be anchored in the Now. You won’t lose yourself in the external world, and you won’t lose yourself in your mind. Thoughts and emotions, fears and desires, may still be there to some extent, but they won’t take you over.” ~Eckhart Tolle In my experience, I have seen that being in a state of deep awareness of your body can give you massive amounts of personal power and additional abilities which most people are not aware of. By consciously being aware of my inner body (in the fullest capacity I am able), I have been able to dissolve lots of dysfunctional and toxic emotions and have developed an interesting level of control over my physical appearance. At one point, when I would eat, I was able to essentially position mass wherever I wanted it in my body. I could also choose to convert the food into mass or into what I feel was "spirit"-- like converting the food into motivation or fuel for an emotional force. So it certainly is interesting what you can find out about your own potential, BUT is it the best idea to be in a state of "permanent connectedness" with your inner body? I can make my question more specific. Shouldn't the body be left to control itself, without your interference, at times? I think my awareness is still egoic and controlling at times and although keeping a high level of bodily awareness has given me great health, immunity from illness, and abilities, I think it might be healthier to release my body to do what it will, without my conscious control. What do you all do? Are you always aware of your inner body/flow of qi throughout your body, or do you at times drop all such awareness? Do you only choose to become conscious of your body at specific times? What works well?
  9. So for a while I have been developing my ability to feel and flow Qi. I believe I must have opened up my third eye, because I can very easily feel what other people are feeling and thinking. (But this "thinking" is more like feeling a "quick-feeling", like a feeling which was generated very quickly and changes the emotional field in a noticeable way). So Im not saying I can read what you are thinking verbatim, but I am saying that I can feel the subtle emotional resonance of the thoughts you are thinking and sometimes feel what the thought itself might be. If that is what it means to have an opened third eye, then so be it. This ability is especially effective in certain places where there is a lot of conscious energy present (either raised by me, or by others (e.g. at the qigong temple I go to)). This sensing of the feelings of others has proven to be a very accurate predictor of behavior. I "know" what the other person is going to do by feeling their emotional makeup and feeling which ways that emotional energy can most smoothly manifest into action. This is easily seen in cases where the other person yields, or gives the right of way to you. The person clearly feels like they will submit or not, otherwise they would be going "against the flow" and would make themselves feel uncomfortable. I can even "see" the emotional field affecting the physical plane if it is strong enough. At one place there is a deep field of pent-up anger. The place actually looks taught and harsh, there is a tightness or constriction in the air and it is very unnatural to joke or laugh. Peoples' eyes even become glossy and slightly bulged. At times this energy field has been changed and lightened up and the there is a corresponding change in the "physics" of the place. Really, at the best of my ability to perceive the objects, the objects APPEAR differently, depending on the strength and predominate "frequency" of the emotional energy field. For as long as I have been experiencing this ability, I have always assumed that other people are aware of these emotional fields and changes in physical aspect as well. I mean, when I am sensing their energy I am sensing their energy, what they are feeling! But today I had an experience which has caused me to question this assumption. I asked my parents what they felt or perceived with respect to the energy field of the house. They stated that they did not notice or feel anything other than what they have always felt and been aware of. They stated to have experienced no perception or indication/manifestation of Qi-energy or any sort of psychic energy. However, I have noticed very significant changes in the energy field of the house and its effect on the inhabitants (me and my parents). I have specifically raised energy in the house and seen it become transformed by the emotions of the inhabitants and the predominate emotional makeup of social interactions. I have felt this energy as the clear driving motivational emotional force behind conversations we have had and also general behavior. The causality to me seems quite clear; the behavior is explained very well by the emotional energetic field. The physical appearances of the house, to me, also seem to undergo shifts in a "the-air-became-thick" kind of way. However, I appear to be alone in perceiving these changes! If this is true, this is a major shift in the way I understand how energy and awareness operates. Is it possible that I can be aware of what another person is feeling, without that person being aware of their feelings themselves? It seems to be the case that other people can become aware of these energy fields as well, through prolonged exposure (which may force open their latent psychic abilities), or through conscious effort (intentionally trying to develop such abilities). But it is not clear to me if the ability to be aware of such energies is governed by A.) Simply bringing attention into one's feelings -Perhaps my parents did not notice the emotional energetic fields because they were simply not paying attention, not concerned with their emotions, or not looking for such emotional fields, "absentminded". B.) Denial/ limiting beliefs -My parents DID feel the changes and emotional energy (at least initially, or for some period), but through denial the awareness was pushed out of conscious processing, out of fear perhaps or disbelief. Like intentionally not looking at someone who intimidates you, or "forgetting" or pushing childhood fears into unconscious. C.) Truly different fields of awareness for different individuals. - What I am aware of, and what is clear and obvious to me, may be completely alien to what others are aware of and what is clear and obvious to them. Essentially saying, we exist in perceptively different worlds. D.) Their psychic centers may be undeveloped - My parents were blocked from awareness of the emotional fields due to lack of development of related psychic centers. Does anyone have experience dealing with people who are highly conscious, when you yourself may not have been? Is consciousness a two-way street or can it be one-way?
  10. I have an ego problem. Ive been working at self-destruction for about a year and half now. Ive seen what it means to break free from it. The ego problem is simple, and so is the solution. It can become seemingly extremely complicated/confused when you throw in family, strong emotional currents, and other mind-clutter. Breaking free for me is process based. You repeat the process until you clear the clutter. I see the clutter for what is now, but it easily refills, being around my family and other people with whom I share a large amount of past. I need to get out and go somewhere else. Does anybody know of places where there are emotionally mature people and it is possible to live or work? Where people know about things like Qi? Im looking at the OSHO resort, it looks promising, but it will be an expensive trip and they dont pay you to work/live there. Any other communities or places you can stay and live with mature people?
  11. OSHO meditation resort/spiritual communities

    Chicago
  12. What are some good situations or ways to know the feeling that YOU are not in control. That no matter what you do, YOU cannot control what happens, and so you must surrender. Ive been raised in a highly intellectual family, where I was always encouraged to just think more and more, exert myself mentally more and more to get the answer, to be right, to be in control. Where mental effort pays off. This has lead me to develop a deeply engrained belief that denial might actually pay off. Where avoiding something seems to make it go away. This is clearly not the case, but how to KNOW this? What is it impossible for me to ever do? What could no amount of mental effort ever achieve? How can I see this? Good example might be death, its impossible not to die... Mind says:But what if you had enough knowledge of qigong--couldnt you live forever? It seems like something like this should be OBVIOUS, not anything that needs to be proved somehow. Ive recently seen that all this mental effort is just wishful thinking, you dont actually DO anything real by denying or imagining. Its not real. It still seems like a form of creation (you are creating ideas/concepts), but they are somehow not real, they dont translate into reality, they dont affect what is. It seems like the only way to really bring about change is to be in alignment with what IS, in agreement with it. That to create anything real you must create along with what already is, rather than against it. This distinction isnt completely clear to me yet. Does anyone know of any spiritual stuff that relates specifically to this idea of creating what is real vs creating illusions? It all seems like legit creation, but somehow one way works and the other doesnt? Why would you choose the way that doesnt work? THanks for any input. Got myself nice and confused about this spirituality stuff
  13. Ive been having some really intense spiritual experiences recently. Such significantly altered states of consciousness, without any drugs--just QI. I feel almost traumatized, I dont know what the hell to grab on to. Ive dissolved, no familiar "me" that I knew for all of my life. And then the "me" comes back, but its not the same. If everybody had these kind of experiences, the world would be a completely different place. How do you process this? It makes me feel sick coming back to my old dreams and aspirations when I know that there is so much more to reality than what I thought. Is this 2012 shit, or have these abilities always been available to humans?
  14. What are some good analogies for understanding Qi and energy in relation to your body? Ive found visual analogies to be very helpful in working with Qi, but some are more effective for certain applications than others. When thinking of resistance I visualize a loop of energy being coiled up; its not that the resistance actually does anything (it doesnt break the loop) it just coils it up unecessarily. This makes a nice way of thinking of mental resistance/ego - like a knot which forgot it was made out of string. Its not that the knot doesnt exist, its true in a relative sense, just not in an absolute sense (its really made out of string). But I find that this analogy isnt that helpful when Im trying to remove myself of toxic energies. I recently was in a central american country and drank the water and came down with a nasty case of dysentery. My mind was used to using the loop-coil analogy and it was difficult to imagine sending the toxic energy out from my body using that analogy. What are some good analogies you use for working with qi? What about for thinking about the ego? Lots of spiritual teachers talk about resistance causing pollution and such, but how does that actually occur? What about the resistance is "bad"? What does it do? How to visualize it?
  15. Too much Qi at my workplace!

    Ive been experiencing qi for a little over a year now. That is to say, ive become aware of it and have been actively manipulating it and using it. When I first discovered that it is possible to "feel the body from the inside", I would go around all day in all places in a state of constant connection with the inner body. This connected state usually caused Qi to (seemingly) spill out from me into whatever place I was at. Reality would become "thick" and people could "read each others minds" easily. Its like "vibing" but on steroids. You just feel what the other person is feeling, and they feel what you feel. When the Qi is weak, you have to actively focus on it to get it, but when it is THICK, even relatively insensitive people cannot help but notice it. However, at my workplace its become INTENSE. I work at a restaurant. I used to raise energy while working and it seems to have accumulated there. For example, I will be driving to work from my home and I will be in a relatively normal state of consciousness. As I get closer to the restaurant I will notice the increase in energy and "thickening" of reality. Even as far off as a couple miles its noticeable. When I step in the door, it literally forcibly changes my state of consciousness. Whatever thoughts/emotions/energized beliefs I had before I got to work effectively vanish, and the predominate thought system-energized beliefs-consciousness state of the restaurant replaces my previous state. It can be really shocking Usually, this is OK, because the people that work there are relatively stable, solid, not easily affected by fear. Sometimes, the vibe can get noticeably darker and people can get quite scared. At the restaurant your perception of time becomes much less. The present moment is so REAL so alive that its the only thing of importance. There is so much attention and energy in everything. Every interaction, every moment is so vibrant and full of life. So much power. You go all day without feeling tired. Even at peak capacity there is no straining, just a torrent of activity flowing fluidly. My question is: How do i shut it off? Its great for learning how consciousness works and for navigating emotional-states. But sometimes, I just want to take a breath and return to normal reality. How do you get Qi OUT of a place where it seems to be lingering? Ive had good recent success by sending it into other places, up into the sky, deep into earth, into the city. Does anyone have any good ideas, intentional-tools? I realize that ultimately its all just intention and that ideas are just tools for developing and focusing intent. Anyone else experiencing really intense experiences like these? Maybe this is just me, maybe this is 2012. I dont know.
  16. Too much Qi at my workplace!

    Thanks for the replies. What about shutting down my personal energy? How do you "calm down" your own energy body? Is it possible to consciously loose connection with your energy body? I feel like the connection has something to do with the pituitary gland. It seems like qi is flowing inward in that area, and if I push it out, it seems to drastically affect my awareness of both my internal qi and external qi as well. But it uses a lot of willpower.
  17. Acceptance

    To accept, means to yield to the reality of the situation. The present moment is as it is, and to resist that doesnt make any sense..because it already is! Right? This is the basis of most spiritual teachings. But this assumes that objective reality exists. If I am to accept the present moment, I must believe that it is a higher authority on what is REAL, than my own judgments/thoughts are. But if I cannot prove that objective reality (truth) exists, then how do I decide what to trust? Who/what is the authority on reality, and how do you know it is truly authority? Basically I am looking for a justification for faith which doesn't necessitate creating unsupported beliefs. And having a hell of a time. Typically I have always used logic as the only source of certainty. But to have peace of mind you must surrender, which is based on acceptance and trust. Without a clear-cut True Authority, trust doesnt seem justifiable. How can you logically justify not using logic? How do you shut the reasoning mind off without setting off it's belief-bullshit-alarm? Ive really been quite distressed for a while about this and I dont know what to do about it. Does anyone have any good links to books or websites where they discuss this in more detail? Can anybody comment whose sitting up higher from a clear vantage point?
  18. Acceptance

    Hmm. I feel like Ive found a nice key to this logic lock. The only thing I can know for sure is nothing. Thats the only thing I can know with absolute certainty. I can completely trust that. The mind can relax. Ahhh
  19. Acceptance

    Yes I have experienced this to be true. But my mind objects. I literally feel like i an "sinning" by accepting something that I dont know to be true. I feel like I am acting insanely. From a peaceful-mindset I realize that I really CANT know anything to be true, and that they only way to discover what is true is to be constantly "making mistakes" and "trying things that I dont know to be true". Again though, the peaceful-standpoint rests on the idea that there IS something which is TRUE. Although I may not know it, it is POSSIBLE to be known. My inability to prove that something is true pulls me into mind-identification and crazy logical thinking. Ahh!
  20. Acceptance

    Thanks, I will look for that thread. Maybe a better way of asking this question is: Is experiential knowledge "more true" than logical reasoning? How do you know that an experience of reality is closer to the truth than thoughts about it? It sucks cause im stuck in my mind and logical-reasoning mode. But I cant get back to awareness mode, because logically it seems indefensible.
  21. Im going deeper and finding that I havent really resolved simple fundamental issues about the way things work. In particular about how to respond to different things. What do you do when you realize youve made a mistake? How does the Taoist master react? I am afraid of knowingly making a mistake. I am afraid of doing something that I know to be wrong. To do something that you know to be wrong to me feels like it is bad, and thats what Im afraid of. Like lets say you knowingly break a law and get caught. The police ask you if you knew it was illegal and you say--Yes. Doesnt that mean that you are inconsistent, that you are insane? Isnt that something to be feared? Something that you dont want. Something to be resisted... When I realize ive made a mistake (on a mathematics test or something) I feel a strong rush of anxiety, of fear, of dread. Who I think I AM is threatened. Its like, I think I am "right", doing the "right thing".. I know who I am, and then Boom, a mistake. Who I thought I am is threatened and there is fear. Accepting it doesnt make much sense to me. How can you accept that YOU are wrong, are false. I am left with a strong building feeling of frustration and anxiety and it feels like there is no way out... Seen from a higher perspective, I dont think you can make a mistake. Who is making a mistake? The thought of "I". An image of myself has made a mistake and I resist that and that causes me suffering. But really there is no mistake. You act and your actions cause responses. If your actions were out of alignment with the situation and your intended goal was not reached-- that is not a problem, thats the way it is. You acted and produced this response. You are responsible for your actions, there is no blaming anyone or anything, because it was always just you who acted and produced the results. The mental image of myself as someone who is right, may resist this. If a goal was not reached, who I thought I was may come under serious threat, but that is just a mental image of myself, not the reality of who i am NOW, in this moment. For any taoist masters with children: What do you say to your child when he has knowingly made a mistake or "done something wrong". Simple issues yet it would really help me if anyone could lend some advice Thanks
  22. Good Qi meridian diagrams

    Where can I find some good diagrams showing the meridians along the body. Google images has some but they arent very good. Im specifically looking at the region around the back of the head and by the shoulders. Seems like it should be a standard thing? Is there some book that has a bunch of good diagrams? Thanks
  23. Taoist Master in Chicago

    Does anyone know of one? I need someone to look at me, size up my qi situation, and give me some decent advice.
  24. Qi is making my hair fall out

    Ive developed a blockage. Its on the top of my skull/scalp. I can feel it as this sense of tightness... Its killing my hair. Last two weeks or so, Ive had LOTS of hair fall out. I run my fingers through my hair and many strands come out. I can probably dissolve it, but it takes a long time. Do you think it will grow back if proper Qi-flow is restored? Or am I going to be permanently bald from now on (age -23). Please dont tell me Im going to be permanently bald.
  25. IME: It seems that most people have a lot of contracted/cut-off/trapped Qi accumulated in their head. It seems this Qi is created when you say "No!" to the present moment--to what is. You resist what is, you create a fold in the energy of the moment, create pressure, pain, the energy becomes cut off. This pain energy gathers together and lodges itself all over the body. Most interestingly is the contracted energy in the head. How much of your skull can you feel? Right now I can hardly feel the top of my head, it feels like there is a dense cloud of numbness between my eyes and the top of my skull. However, there have been times when I was able to feel my skull from front to back, top to bottom, no dense pain energy... And let me tell you, IT WAS AMAZING@! I believe the ego structures are located in the head and consists of contracted Qi energy. When this is cleared, the ego-less state arises naturally. When the Qi in my head was cleared, there was no work on my part to be "non-reactive".. I just WAS that. SO the question is, Can you feel your skull from front to back? Have you ever? Or do you have a cloud of shit up there as well