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About triestestudent

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    Dao Bum
  1. Checking in..

  2. New to Tao, and here

    ============================================================== Hi new poster, i'm new here too but just wanted to share a quick thought since what you wrote in the second paragraph of your post touched this heart o'mine. i struggled with depression off and on for many years (runs in the family on both sides). Recently after a bizarre 'break-up' of sorts began, for the first time in this life, experiencing anxiety attacks. For a little while there i ended up choosing to take anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds as well as undergoing psychiatric therapy sessions once a week. i'm glad i went that route for that time but fairly quickly began coming off of all of it. It just happened naturally...universe, if you will, pointing out signs this was no longer needed. What has been of tremendous help since then is not only going back to my earlier practices but now undertaking Qigong classes under a wonderful instructor. It is YiRen lineage and school 'style'. i go to every single class the Qigong Master teaches and am feeling healing taking place not only physically but emotionally and i'd be so bold as to say spiritually too. Sooooooooooooooo...just want to encourage you to keep headed in the direction that feels good to you and i don't doubt you'll see for yourself that healing does take place and perhaps you'll even draw the same strange conclusion i have drawn (thus far anyways) that these conditions are actually a kind of bizarre blessing. i am now exceedingly grateful for my experience of depression and anxiety for the simple though perhaps bizarre reason that they made me realize what will never satisfy me and never satiate me. It is an inner push towards better health in every i do understand. Regards - g
  3. konichiwa ni hao namasta and if you must hello i`m new

    Konichiwa! If you ever want help with editing and improving your written grammar into English please let me know. i am new here too. i have experience as a teacher's assistant for a university here in the U.S. and worked with students from all over the world that were studying here. What i did and do is on a voluntary is simply an aspect of enjoyment for me. And while i once was an avid martial arts practitioner, back in the day, i now am studying qigong and will be studying tai chi as well after a very long absence from any form of martial arts training due to putting energy elsewhere (raising two daughters...attending university...etc.). By the the dragon!!! Beautiful! *oh...regarding the i instead of I that is where 'i' find self to be, for now...just in case any reader might be wondering*
  4. Sheer overwhelming excitement

    =========================================================== can't rush healing and the whole wisdom learning process, imho, but sometimes it helps just to know you are definitely not alone. Not by a long shot. And i don't want to sugarcoat it...i was so devastated by the experience that i ended up seeing a psychiatrist, getting on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds i gave up my practices for a little while until things settled back down. Everyone is different in terms of how quickly they get through these dark nights of the soul. Eventually i kept forgetting to take the meds and realized i was forgetting because i no longer needed them. The lovely psychiatrist sat me down (we were thinking the same luckily enough because i dreaded any attempt on her part to persuade me this way or that way by this X factor time) and said essentially, "I don't think you need to continue with this therapy anymore but do feel free to come back if you change your mind." She made sure i was feeling the same way and that was that. Basically?...i am empathetic cuz this only took place just last spring. But yeah...i feel like i walked through the fires and am feeling the whole Phoenix energy now. Sending you another Italiano bearhug and wishing you well.
  5. Sheer overwhelming excitement

    Sounds like parkour! Love watching on YouTube the folks who do can see the various animal modes of movement and i can't help but admire the courage, discipline, and body freedom exhibited. Far as what you wrote about what you went through in that relationship...i am sending you if you'll accept it a huge Italiano bearhug. Been there. Done that. And can really just...well...suck tho now so many months later i'm actually grateful for the sucky experience...the whole of it. It made me, forced me honestly, to go deeper within and look at some shadow aspects to self which now has resulted in a tremendous set of 'bearhugs' to self. Acceptance and determination to go the distance in the Now. This place seems really cool! Ciao - g
  6. introductiong

  7. Why Taoism is different

    Does Taoism teach one can go beyond Mind. The Tibetans in The Book of the Dead give quite specific details on the Bardos...and part of what i understood is that the Bardos are projections of the Mind. But my question is what is projecting the Mind? Also...can we weave a tapestry that avoids being limited by any ism?
  8. Ninja steps

    Thank you Marblehead...what kind of marble are you? Cat's eye?? More of an agate? i feel the need to clarify that when i write surrender and accept what is as is this doesn't actually imply complete passivity paradoxically enough. As i sincerely work on detoxifying through undertaking the chigong exercises under the guidance of a wonderful teacher the intention is also to be far more open to Tao and what i regard as Dharma. This place looks like a lovely school where i can learn from the rest of y'all. It feeeeeeeeeeeeels wonderful to just keep learning and being open to sharing what others have tried to help me understand in this lifetime.
  9. Ninja steps

    Used to...used to write all manners of poetry, short stories and such...still LOVE to write...something about writing triggers all kinds of cool stuff... Thank you for your kind Voids! *kind of corny so please do forgive this cornball humor...never know what is gonna pop out - Jack-n-the-box -
  10. hi there

    boomerang (right back at cha)
  11. Ninja steps

    Hello all, First-timer...feeling uncharacteristically shy...hmmmmmmmmm. Uhm...since i woke up in the amrit hours and can't seem to feel tired enough to go back to bed thought i'd check in the lobby. Seems right to give some background. i've explored some of kundalini yoga, been initiated by a few gurus (insatiably curious that way) of the Sound/Light variety, took refuge in Vajrayana Buddhism and just like to keep eyes and ears open. The goal, as of late?...surrender, pay attention and accept what is as is. There has been a change...a continuance of awareness and quicker realization when the attention drops. Intention is to keep learning and remaining open. Ciao, g P.S. Ever watching the film, Moon, i can never look at emoticons the same way. i think that was the name of the film?