Sifu

You are too kind, Scotty! Thanks for the welcome! Bob

I took the title sifu, out of respect for my tai chi Sifu. Sifu told me that I was going to teach. I balked and figured someday, not any time soon, years from now. A month later Sifu signed me up to teach at a couple of conferences. I really enjoyed both opportunities yet had little faith that I was anywhere near ready to teach. Sifu graduated me and left the country for a bit. I taught students that had been learning since well before I started. Students who had seen me start, crippled unable to come close to even posing in most of the forms. It is amazing how tai chi can quickly heal and give flexibility back without any pain in the process. I have gotten great joy out of teaching them and seen great progress in their forms. So out of respect for my Sifu, and out of faith in my Sifu, I use the title Sifu. If you feel I am grabbing a name well above my achievements, I will be the last one to argue with you over that. My grounding is horrible, my posture pathetic. I bounce, and I have to give away energy since I can barely manage what is generated by the simplest of qigong. My balance is inconsistent. I constantly need help from those around me. I get distracted by the joy of doing it. Apart from moving with decent grace and breathing fairly well, I am a total basket case. The joy, healing and connection that I feel when practicing are great rewards, so I cannot even claim to suffer for my art. I am nervous to teach qigong although my master in that art has given me permission to and encouraged me to do a small bit of teaching. I feel great remorse and dread over the consequences of my teaching in past years. What I was teaching was something that I was quite familiar with and considered quite safe. So it is not without trepidation that I call myself Sifu. Bob

Josh, do you mind if we all send you a bit of chi? A few extra strokes of the wild mare's mane tends to gather well more that I need. Bob

Josh I have been appreciating your posts, hang in there! Bob

Here is my view on suicide, first of it is damned narcissistic. Second off, suicide is the ultimate act of shallowness. Easiest and painless, I doubt that really helps on the other side, announcing, before entering the borderland, clear the way, here comes a wimp! Best way to die, I can guess at though. Do something wildly brave and helpful instead. Here is a goofy thing to do to get yourself killed. Try actually following the teachings of Jesus. He pretty much promised persecution without limit if you do. I doubt society will let you last long if you do, and you will learn something that few of us ever will. Sure a lot of folk say they are Christians, but really putting others first while abandoning the pursuit of personal gain is not something society at large will put up with for long. Seriously, you waited in line for this, got a reservation. prepared and planned for this. probably 1000 others would have been happy to eat at this table instead of you, and because of a spot on the table or a dirty fork, you want to have a fit and stomp out. They are never going to let you back into the restaurant. Sure a lot of the stuff on the menu is really horrible, but you knew that coming in. You have probably forgotten, but you helped plan this mess. So the next time you are feeling left out dancing because your soul doesn't glow all bright, and you decide to clean up and incarnate again so you can hang out with the bright ones, where are you going to be in line? Any bum who at least sticks to the endless karma yoga will be able to bump you. The half decent bad incarnations will be taken. Seriously for an immortal luminous being, 100 years of torment is a hang nail. Here is a community of Tao folk, being asked how to kill yourself. What a waste. These are the folk to ask how to resolve ills, cure the incurable, and bring joy into your life. If you are really looking for suicide, I will admit I don't deeply understand deep long term depression. I will admit I don't know what is going on in your life, and it would not be at all surprising if most the people around you cared more about themselves than they do you. If you are considering suicide, then you probably care a lot more about yourself than everyone else put together, and that is not a lot. I have been there to pick up the pieces after a suicide and a murder suicide. I have two sets of adoption papers to prove it. Suicide really sucks from my point of view. Personally I am looking forward to death. There is a lot I want to know. But right now I am trying to get and give as much as I can from life. The day that I cannot do anything for my fellow man, I may start practicing biofeedback and pass on from this mortal coil. I won't be throwing karma around by asking others how to do it. Till then I may scream on the drops, and throw up on the corners, but I plan to enjoy this roller coaster. Bob

Or wear a nappy? as when we first went crawling we sought unknowing

Howdy, from the conservative heart of Texas! I was looking for a lively tai chi / qigong forum and managed to find the Tao Bums. This place looks like fun! I have been doing tai chi for a fairly short period of time, when my sifu told me that I was going to teach it seemed a bit early. Like maybe four or five years or so too early. I am deriving a great deal of joy from teaching tai chi so it is working out for me. Hard to describe how delightful it is for a student to sidle up and confess, 'You know that ball we are shaping? I can feel it!' My knowledge of the Tao is fairly thin so if my comments seem a bit confused please feel free to slap me around when I say something that ain't quite right. I would much rather look stupid today than to be stupid tomorrow. I also do gardening, hand tool woodwork, tool making and art. Bob