Jim D.

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Everything posted by Jim D.

  1. My wife has been advising me on the technique in opening our stuck garage door. I struggle and use muscle to open it. She uses finesse. All she does is turn the door knob to the left and then to the right, and it opens with little or no effort at all. I tried her technique this morning and got the same results. I said to her, it reminded me of Tai Chi. She said she thought the same. It took me all summer and part of the Fall to try it her way. It would make our lives a lot easier if we paid attention to others who try to help us.
  2. My brief resume': Not bad for a guy that grew up in a tough neighborhood, lived above a tavern, and a smorgasbord of mental health concerns to include being sexually abused. Thanks for stepping up and taking responsibility for the secrete that you held, while I blamed someone else. I owe Mr. Walker an amends.
  3. I'm back kiddies. Missed you. Archery was fantastic. Thought of you as I hit the target. You know, you can shoot a lot of arrows in an hour and half. Say, have any of you participated in group therapy. I will tell you about Yalom's model. Look it up so you can follow along with me. First the group has to be homogenous, you know, all alike. It is good to have only 15 in a group. It is easy to manage, and everyone gets to participate. We start out with the group leader asking the group to come up with something they would like to talk about. Then the group leader asks who would like to go first. But before this happens, we set group rules e.g. no cross talking, no swearing, no high jacking the group, no infighting, no verbal abuse, and keep it on yourself. But you know what happens. There is a dynamic that occurs when a new person comes into the group (me). It upsets them. Yeah, someone in the group will challenge the group leader, and of course, the group leader has to reign them in and establish his authority and presence. Well you know, after a while the group gets use to the leadership of the group leader and they all settle down and act like the adults everyone expects to be. So far kiddies, your behaving in the manner I expected you to behave. I am different than you, and you want me to be like you so you feel comfortable and safe. Some of you kiddies are trying to be the group leader, but can't do it with finesse. I takes years of self examination to accomplish this. It would be a customary technique for me to ask someone in my past therapy groups to take the chair for the evening. But I cannot do that yet, because no one has proven themselves capable of that yet, but "it's a commin." I think that Mr. Grey has potential. In between the lines of anger, there have been glimpses of him and his issues. Mr. Walker has potential if he can only learn to ask for what he wants without being passive aggressive. But he has to learn to keep it on himself and not blame the group leader for the feelings that bubble up. For example, why is the Jim D. pissing me off so much. Mr. Rocky is new to the group. It is obvious he needs to establish himself through his acting out and adolescent behavior. Our group community will need to work with Mr. Rocky on his lack of communication skills. Some of the words he has used, not chosen to use, is probably the way he communicates out in the world. Your see, a man's real self comes out when he feels safe behind a key board. He seems to hate himself for some reason. But if he can stop acting out and act spiritually he will progress nicely. The people I helped were people in the System e.g. Juvie, D.U.I. , Domestic Violence Perpetrators, County Jail, TASK, DCFS, Parolees, Drug Addicts, Alcoholics...Now, do you kiddies really want to behave like the above, or do you want to work on yourselves and show us what you got, what you don't like about yourself, and what you want to change. Or are you happy with the way you communicate, and at the level you communicate which is adolescent or pre-adolescent...when you challenged your parent's authority. You know, Mr. Sean told me that the Bums were a weird bunch. Amen to that! But it is doable if you follow the rules of conduct. They're there for a reason. And that is to keep the chaos agents down and manageable. I guess we all need to read that memo again. P.S. Do you really think that you are going to be able to get over on me. I have got all the time in the world, and the experience to handle it. Your attempt to piss me off, or weigh me down is silly. You can't beat a powerful man who believes in himself. Like I told a Methadone client in Methadone clinic filled with retired or broken down gang bangers...a client who challenged me in a room that was closed and I was in the interior...the only white guy other than a white client...do you really want to go there???You see, you can beat me down to a grease spot, but you can't beat the right out of me. O.K. That's it for now. Going to watch a Netflix movie. Again, it has been entertaining as always. Thanks for helping me keep what I give away. And remember, Jesus is really all right with me!!! Or Buddha, or Shinto, or Hara Christina, George Harrison, Bad Finger... Disclaimer: Anything said above is not an attempt to circumvent the rules about psychiatry, diagnosis, or treatment. Those that want to participate in a Mr. Rogers experience can at their own will. Examples given of my past experiences as a group leader were given as a matter of addressing unprofessional conduct of respondents that were less than polite, and down right rude and ignorant. Or should I say, "ignant!" Your truly forever and forever...
  4. I felt I was possessed twice in my life when actually I was profoundly depressed. There is a lot of darkness and sometimes grey, but mostly darkness, dread, demoralization, lack of hope, lethargy (see Beck's Inventory on the Internet. Take it, it is an eye opener on how much we tolerate and get use to when it comes to depression). Depression is usually anger turned inward. Other kinds of depression are exogenous, situational. Most are chemical imbalance.
  5. Well, Ms. Ilu, the thumb doesn't point forward either. You still have three pointing back at you...and the point is. Sweep your own side of the street before you tell someone else to sweep theirs. How about this, "don't spit in the wind." Try that and see if it works Or, don't take my Inventory if you haven't taken yours. Or KISS, "Keep it simple stupid" Or if you or your significant are worrying about what going to happen tomorrow just ask the question, "What day are we in." Or, if you or your SO are living in the Past and/or the Future "you're pissing on today."
  6. The only reason I came back after a 4 year break is that I got bored and needed to fill up my time intellectually. So far, it has been humorously funny and entertaining to observe people behave in the manner they did when I first came on board. This is what I have observed. There are those that have good self esteem and do not let themselves get down into the grease trap. There are others that love to attack someone they don't understand. This happened to Jesus, Ghandi, Malcom X, Martin Luther King. Then there are those that are hiding behind some secrete morbidity that they are ashamed of. Then there are those that come out of hiding when they feel safe to attack in numbers. I have my opinions, and you have yours. And that is it. Your are not going to win by attacking me. But if you find the similarities and go from there we might learn something together. So I say, let's keep the Intellect over Emotions and will have some semblance of Sanity. Remember, we cannot see each other, hear each other, sense each other, so interpretations are left up to the reader. And if you read fragmentation which are my posts, this is not a true representation of my entire self. There are so many affective interpretations that influence the reader because of their own stuff. Especially, if they cannot see the presenter. Your brother in Christ
  7. No Mr. Illumarien, it works! Hold your hand up and point to someone. Now what do you see? Three fingers and a thumb pointing back at you. Are thumbs considered fingers? The thumb can be treated as a finger but mostly within the context of fingers. Both digits and fingers are hypernyms of the word thumb. Here are my dictionary* definitions: the short, thick first digit of the human hand, set lower and apart from the other four and opposable to them.
  8. Oh yes you do Mr. Grey. I am retired and have all day waiting for you to entertain me. Were you the one that tempted Christ and thought you would get away with it? I love Alfalfa in the young rascals. Now you are dating yourself. Watch the Passion of the Christ. Relate to the hooded person with the hideous child...and then go on to Judas. The only reason Judas did not make it because he did not make his amends to Jesus. Then look at Peter who did take responsibility for his actions and repented. He was around for quite a while until he was crucified upside down. Did you know that Luke was skinned alive because he was then them. If you are the same person that started up the new thread "to accommodate me," you mention your inability to control your anger. I think that you also mentioned your upbringing as being dysfunctional e.g. physical and emotional abuse. Now Mr. Grey we are starting to get somewhere!!! Your use of "chap" which tells me that you are probably a resident of England. No one forces you to read my stuff. I have to think that there is a part of you that is attracted to me, as a person. You just can't let it go. I don't want to let it go because the more I give it away the more I keep. I don't mind service work. It's a good thing. How is it you are reluctant to look at yourself through Mr. Rogers eyes? What are you avoiding? The phrase "if your getting kick in the pants, then you're still in front" is funny but it says a lot. To be in my class, which was in a Maximum Security Prison for women, you would have had to pass a GED. I sure from what I have seen in your writing that would not have been a problem. Your ability to pass the courses I taught would be another e.g. Sociology, Criminology, Philosophy, Introduction to Psychology, Marriage and Family, Ecology, Abnormal Psychology etc. Which one would have been the one you would have chosen to improve your life skills and future? What are you really interested in Mr. Grey? And finally, although I don't think this is an "Adios" for both of us, your reference to my "authority" probably came from Mr. Walker, an associate of yours who was "off putted" by my subtle reference to my credentialing. So, to not keep him guessing and feeling bothered I shared my courage, strength and hope with him. I sent him a brief resume' of my accomplishments. Sorry Mr. Walker, I left off that I am a writer, artist, and poet to boot. Last thought, no one will listen to you if you don't have anything to back it up. Mr. Rogers knew that as well as PBS. I am still looking for that line item and the appropriation of funds form the 20M Senate Grant. I am going to archery now. Chao!!! Your brother in Christ. Jim D. MHS, LCPC
  9. To discuss something Mr. Grey, you have to be able to relate to it. You know what they say, if you're getting kicked in the pants than you're still in front. My thoughts must be very interesting to you and Mr. Walker because you both have invested a lot of time talking about me. If I irritate you that much, don't read my comments. Just pass it up and read something else. I know, read your stuff again because you must have had fun creating darkness. What would Mr. Rogers have said to you when you were seven years old and you brought up your resentments and insecurities about me to him? Would he have held you and nurtured you. You have felt safe with him. If I were you, I'd get to some kind of 12 Step meeting, or start attending one like ACOA or Al-anon, or Emotions Anonymous. Then get with your sponsor and do a 4th Step. And go on to the 8th Step, but pass it by your sponsor first to make sure your motives are pure, and then make your amends directly and honestly. And an ancillary suggestion would be to watch Mr. Rogers from the inception of his Program to the end when he died from stomach cancer at the age of 74. And then go and see the movie. If you do this, you will have filled up your spiritual battery sufficiently enough to see the lovely cathedral inside of you...you will be able to get past the garbage that you have been holding on to which litters the front entrance of your cathedral. It is hard work, but worth the effort. I know I have done and am still sweeping out my cathedral. Look up Erickson's Developmental Stages and choose which one you relate too. Tell me, and I will help you through to the next Stage in a private message just between you and me. Keep it private Mr. Grey because you do not want to embarrass your self more than you have already in front of the community. I am guessing that the child within has been used and abused some. I hope that taking it out on me has been a relief valve for you Mr. Grey. Don't worry about my feelings. The years I have spent helping and teacher others in the penal system helped me to let it just roll off my back. My brother in Christ
  10. President Trump

    This man has been dogged since the time he took office. He has never been allowed to do his job, really. I admire is tenacity under adversarial conditions. I like that he has gone after other super powers and held them fiscally accountable. I am not concerned about his relationship with Ukraine. None of this would have made a difference if he were not despised by those that oppose him as a person. He is not a politician and I like that. I like that he calls out the media. I like that he confronted China on their "Monopoly" in the free market. I like that he wants to get along with Putin. Whether he likes England or not is off no concern to our economy, or to me. He is a business man trying to do what he knows best as a business. As far as his mental health status, whatever that means, Trump has not been any different than John Kennedy when it came to women. And it was over looked, and forgiven. Richard Nixon, "Tricky Dickie" and we have people spending tax payers money to go after him. Have you ever tried running a government whose opposing party, the Democrats, hate your guts because you got the job, and they didn't. You want to talk about dishonesty, what about the Clintons, the Kennedys, the Biden's, Herbert Hoover, Richard J. Daley, Giuliani…just politicians over all. Just sayin...
  11. If it were me, I would with rigorous honesty look inside...at me if I felt "a bit off putting." Maybe I should have defined "your credentials." These are unusual descriptors and not used by most people. In my field of expertise, it is not uncommon, especially in Experimental Psychology. Again, what does your observation of me have anything to do with Mr. Rogers and Spirituality. Does your critique of me help you...feel better about you. Did I ask you to take my inventory and share it with me or the community. You know I love you just the way you are. Enjoy the challenge of my critique of Mr. Rogers and share your own observations of what his spirituality has done for you. You know when you're pointing at me, there are four coming back at you. Let's get back on track, O.K.
  12. President Trump

    Is there some way I can delete this topic?
  13. President Trump

    Please stop all of this "insanity." You have proven my point about Emotions over Intellect = Insanity. Please stop! I am sorry I started this topic. I want to go back and rethink it, and not post my personal feelings and views of a person I admire as not afraid to stand up and fight back. Is he a little crazy, I think so. It was all about my history of being bullied and not having the courage to stand up for myself. I wanted attention brought to me because I was bored. This attempt at entertaining myself was brief and very negative...not worth it if others are going to act out until they are not bored anymore. It is out of hand. I feel a lot of negativity and it is not good for me or anyone. It is becoming very dark in here. So, open up the box and let some light in. In a 100 years, what difference will it make.
  14. And humans will give no love. Take a look at the two minute YouTube segment entitled Discipline and share your observations about what appears to be a staged event. Somehow your took my observations personally, Mr. Walker. Not intended to offend anyone. For me, when I push the issue of "attachments" I am trying to win an argument, or I am trying to control a feeling of being out of control, or wrong. Feeling wrong means I have to step back and examine my motives. For me there is nothing wrong with agreeing to disagree, or letting go. I don't need to get anyone to agree with me because I believe in myself and worth. If you think, Mr. Walker, that there are indigent, disenfranchised group participants in Fred Roger's group than there is...for you.But how is it that PBS, or Mr. Rogers did not make that clear. PBS had to do some sort of background check. Yes, the thread started out talking about a movie and its spiritual message. I shared how it is that it didn't work for me. I took a closer look at the content and context of the show and asked if what I observed was a real time representation of current events, and was it reliable and verifiable. Then I asked if Mr. Rogers mission was to reach all people and there seemed to be a weakness here. Then I asked a question about who was behind this production and became aware that it was PBS...a non-for-profit organization. In my experiences in working for non-profit organizations, at the end of the year, any monies left over are given over to management, and sometimes staff, and purchases of equipment. So, yes, the intent was to talk about the spirituality of Mr. Rogers. And as I understand spirituality, it means when I do thus and so, something changes within in me. I did not see evidence in other comments, only sentiment. This left the door wide open. My background in Etiology and Epidemiology lends me to critique that which is purported as something to believe.
  15. President Trump

    I did not start this topic with the intent to argue anyone's politics, policies, or the ability to be President. I could care less about Politics because I don't have the background or interest in it. I'm not a political person. I do care about a man's inner struggle with himself and others because I can absolutely identify. But that is it. That is far as it goes. The activity that has occurred here thus far reminds me of my curiosity with a finding a hornets nest in my backyard. My intent is to explore, the hornets intent is to defend. The hornet's agenda is to be a hornet. It lives its life that way, and that is it. But hornets have their feelings of fear and resentment. When perceiving a threat, real or imagined, they go after the threat. They even leave their scent on the victim so that other hornet supporters will add to the agony of the victim. In psychological terms this is called mass hysteria. You see, the hornet never stops to think about questioning how it is that the human or otherwise stopped to take a look. They don't notice the affect of the curious or the honest motive. They just want to attack and get it over with...this behavior brings their inner world back to equilibrium, homeostasis. I was stung by hornets three times, with the third time putting me in the hospital. I now stay clear of hornets, but you never know what a safe distance is, really. But you know, I still find them interesting and important in the community of man and nature.
  16. President Trump

    Thanks Earl Grey. I was warned already.
  17. Back to Fred Rogers. I watched him chair as group leader on a segment regarding the topic of discipline and parenting. As I looked at the group participants I noticed that some people were missing. I did not see ghetto blacks, Hispanics, trailer park parents, or single moms in this group. The group I did observe seemed fairly affluent, well spoken, and cooperative with their significant other. This post is made to support my assertion that although Mr. Rogers TV personality seems to be a kind and generous person, PBS missed their mission to get the message to all people, not to a few select middle class few. When I asked for an answer about the 20M PBS received through Fred Rogers efforts, I was asking for line items on a spread sheet. Rogers said that his over all costs were thousands, not millions. So why not continue with that budget? Who got the rest? I also listened very closely to his message as a Developmental Psychologist. He wasn't saying anything new that someone else could not have gotten in a text book e.g. Dare to Discipline, Focus on the Family, Dr. James Dobson, 1976. So, why this man?